Silent Night • An Avengers Story

Six-Part 3

"Hey only six more things to cross off your bucket list...at least until we can come up with some other stuff to do."

Trish nodded with a forced smile as Sam turned around before she dropped her head a bit as her mind swirled with thoughts. She let out a breath of air a bit too loud that caught Sam's attention.

The black man turned and frowned.

"What's wrong gumdrop?"

Trish shrugged, not even finding the energy the sign that she didn't want to talk about it. "You don't know or you don't wanna talk?" Sam asked, taking a bite of the cereal that he had poured despite it being noon.

Trish signed "don't wanna talk." and Sam nodded. "Well, when you feel like talking come find me. Or better yet, go find Bruce. He's a doctor and he's also been nagging about getting you to tell him what you can and can't remember of your time in HYDRA to keep on the record. But only when you feel comfortable."

Trish nodded and Sam walked out to go eat his cereal in the living room, leaving her to exhale and sit down on a barstool, flopping her chin into her palms as her leg began to bounce up and down anxiously.

The blonde zoned out as her mind went through the words that played through her head.

Lonely...

Silenced...

Burned...

A light finger on her shoulder made her snap out of her thoughts, Trish's head turning to see her favorite super soldier standing there with a small smile on his face.

"Sam told me you crossed off sewing."

"Yea. It was nice to learn it. I damaged a lot of clothing back in HYDRA and they would refuse to repair them, so if it happens again I can fix it." Trish signed. Steve chuckled. "Well, once SHIELD clears you to start working with us, then you can start getting a pay check and you won't have to worry about fixing them. And plus SHIELD will fix or replace anything on your future uniform."

Trish frowned. "Uniform?" She asked in confusion, her brow furrowing. "I just got word today that if Bruce clears you mentally, then we can move on to see more of what you've learn from HYDRA."

"Wouldn't that make people...nervous?" Trish asked, her eyebrows raising nervously. "What do you mean?" Steve asked, sitting in the chair next to her. "Wouldn't it make people nervous that all that I know is from HYDRA? Wouldn't they want me to learn more of SHEILD's fighting styles?"

"Well, I mean sure, but even so our tactics are similar to HYDRA, and now that technology is advancing everyday then we don't have to worry much about being caught off guard." Steve explained and Trish nodded, still looking unconvinced.

"What's wrong, doll? You don't seem excited about maybe finally to get out of here."

"I talked to Bruce about it, but i've just had these words in my head I can't seem to get out." Trish told the super soldier, who leaned his palm. "What kind of words?" He asked.

"Kind of like...code words, but not quite. I was never under control by HYDRA because I was raised there, but I think they still wanted to make sure I wouldn't try anything, and I think those words were more similar to like a person telling a dog to 'focus'." Trish explained, exhaling in frustration.

"Huh. Do you want us to avoid those words?" Steve asked and Trish shook her head. "I think hearing them helps me forget of them more, because now they don't have the same meaning. Plus they're so commonly used it'd be hard." The former assasssin said, shrugging.

"Alright, if you say so." Steve said with a light smile that comforted Trish. She returned it before frowning at him.

"Doll?"

Steve turned red and coughed. "Oh, it's a nickname we used to use back in the 40's...I didn't mean to use it, it just kind of slips out sometimes with women." Steve explained and Trish nodded.

"I like it. I think it's cute." She said and Steve coughed again, rubbing the back of his neck. "Thanks. I try not to use such old fashioned phrases but it's hard."

"I get it. Sometimes I think to myself like that. It's kinda harder to use them signing but I always like to hear them, from any decade, just because I'm not so sure which one I'm from." Trish explained and Steve frowned.

"You don't know what year you were born?"

Trish shrugged. "Or Month, or date, or time, or city, even country." She told him and Steve looked shocked.

"Have you asked Bruce to look through HYDRA's files?"

Trish nodded. "He couldn't find it. All that came up was my HYDRA file." She said. Steve thought for a moment before getting up abruptly and holding his hand out to the former assassin.

"Cmon doll. I got a place we need to go."