I'm Not Gay, I Swear! | McPriceley

Chapter Twenty-One

Steve was starting to feel bad for what he had done.

(Bet that was a sentence you'd never thought you'd read.)

Sure, he never really cared for Connor in the first place. It was just another guy that he could rat out for not being entirely truthful about being straight. And by being a Straight Companion just like Connor, getting Connor fired for being gay would've made Steve look even better. It was a great plan, really.

Except, then it didn't go exactly as planned.

Connor got fired all by himself, and then Steve got placed as Connor's Straight Companion. Annoyed with this job placement, Steve decided to just spend most of his time away from the McKinley house, just taking an hour or two out of his day to "talk" to Connor. But really, the guy was hopeless. He didn't need a Straight Companion, he needed a counselor. And that was not what Steve was here for.

But then things started to backfire. Connor's parents caught him cutting himself one time, and instantly demanded that Steve stay with them 24/7. Steve was really irritated by this request at first, but as he spent more time with Connor, he saw just how bad the guy had gotten. The once super bubbly and excitable boy was now sad and silent. It seemed... unnatural.

Steve wondered that if he had actually been a good companion to Connor, maybe he could've prevented this from happening. That maybe Connor could've been even going outside of the house at this rate, instead of constantly being looked after, just in case he would do something to himself again.

And Steve hated to have sent Chris away the other day. Okay, he didn't hate it, because he never really cared for Chris in the first place, but it surely wasn't his favorite thing. But he just wanted to spend more time with Connor himself, to try to fix all of the things he had messed up on.

At the moment, Steve was sitting on a chair next to Connor's bed, as Connor sat atop his mattress, scribbling away in his journal for the third time that day. No one knew what exactly Connor had been writing in there, but everyone respected the journal's privacy. Though they were all a little scared of what they'd find inside it. Of what things Connor's mind was full of in his current state.

After taking a deep breath, Steve finally decided to ask the underlying question. "So... what're you writing in there?"

Connor wrote down a few more words before answering, though he never looked up. "Things."

"What, uh, what kind of things?"

"Things that I'm not sharing," he said abruptly.

"Okay, okay," Steve sighed. "I'll stop nagging you about it then."

Connor just nodded, before finally shutting his journal and placing it on his nightstand. Steve noticed his hand hover over the drawer's handle before finally turning away from it. His pocket knife was gone now, of course. His parents had scavenged through his entire room to make sure he had no other sharp objects that he could harm himself with, which left Connor to only write with a twistable crayon. Steve still thought that that had been a bit extreme, but he wasn't one to argue with them.

After a few more minutes, Connor finally got off of his bed, and out of instinct, Steve stood up to follow him. Connor just shook his head with a small sigh. "Steve, I think I can take a shower by myself."

"Oh, uh, right! Sorry, I'm just supposed-"

"Yes, yes, you're supposed to follow me wherever I go. But I think we'd both very much appreciate not going into a shower together."

"Yeah- of course," Steve let out a nervous laugh before sitting back down. Connor shrugged and made his way across the hallway and into the bathroom before shutting the door.

. . .

Steve hadn't even noticed how long Connor had been gone, since he'd fallen asleep within minutes of Connor leaving for the bathroom. Looking after someone and making sure they were alright every second of the day was a tiring job, and Steve didn't get much sleep in general, as he was forced to make sure Connor fell asleep safely every night, too.

He was starting to feel more like a babysitter than a companion.

But when Steve had opened his eyes, Mr. McKinley had been standing in front of him, aggressively shaking his shoulders to get him to wake up. Behind him, in the hallway, Mrs. McKinley was pacing around, obviously talking to someone on a telephone. Steve's eyes widened as he looked back up at Connor's father.

"What happened?"

Instead of answering, Mr. McKinley just scowled at him. "Why did you fall asleep? Why weren't you paying attention?"

"I-I didn't mean to! Just- what happened?!"

The older man huffed angrily and turned away from Steve, taking a few moments hesitation before finally answering him. Steve immediately ran into a panic, and quickly made his way out of the house, ignoring the man's screams of protest behind him. Without stopping for anything, Steve continued to run, down the sidewalk, around the corner, and towards the diner. But before he could finish his route, he ran into a group of people, knocking both him and another person to the ground.

Steve rubbed his head as he began sitting back up, repeatedly saying sorry to the other person before finally seeing their face. "Oh my god, Kevin."

Kevin brushed off his pants, glaring at Steve. "What do you want?"

Steve looked up at the other people, grateful to see that Arnold, Naba, Chris, and James were all there. He took a deep breath, standing back up and holding out a hand for Kevin, who ignored him and stood up himself.

"Steve, what are you running for?" Chris asked him, looking slightly concerned.
"I... I needed to find you guys. Something's happened."

"With the McKinleys?" Kevin's eyes widened, his annoyed expression completely wiped off his face.

Steve nodded. "It-it's Connor. He... he's tried to kill himself."