I'm Not Gay, I Swear! | McPriceley

Chapter Eight

Once their little meeting had ended, Arnold pulled Kevin aside as Naba and Connor continued walking down the sidewalk.

"Dude, what is up with you two?"

Kevin blinked at his best friend. "I-I don't know what you're talking about."

"You act like one of those couples who don't know that they're a couple. Constantly teasing one another, smiling at each other endlessly, always offering to do something for the other. Don't you see it?"

Kevin shook his head. "No... no, you're wrong. Friends can do those things, too."

"Yeah, friends who also happen to kiss each other a lot. Why don't you try talking to him about it?"

"Because that's not what's happening!" Kevin yelled. "We're just friends. Besides, he's straight. Being gay is bad or whatever to him."

"Have you ever considered the thought that he's fighting the fact that he's gay?" Arnold asked. "Maybe he's struggling to come to terms with himself. Just like how you were. Maybe he just needs a little help finding out who he truly is."

Kevin stared down at the floor as he took that into consideration. Could that be true? Could Connor possibly like him, too? But he didn't want to get his hopes up about it. That would be too good to be true. Kevin just shrugged Arnold off. "Yeah, I highly doubt that. Why would they send a guy who's questioning his own sexuality to come help me out of my own? That doesn't seem to make sense."

Arnold sighed. "There really is no changing your mind, is there? But you should still at least talk to him. Maybe there's a lot more going on then what meets the eye. Plus, you promised you'd start talking to him about your problems weeks ago. And I'm guessing you still haven't yet."

Kevin folded his arms and continued to avoid eye contact with Arnold. "I just want to be extra sure that I can trust him. I swear, I'll talk to him soon enough."

"You better. I can't say that I'm not at least a little bit worried about you. You need to listen to Connor. He seems like he really just wants to make sure that you're alright."

"I know..." Kevin said. "I'll find a way to talk to him within the next few days, okay?"

"Okay," Arnold nodded. "Now, c'mon. Connor and Net Neutrality are probably wondering what happened to us."

Kevin chuckled at Naba's nickname before following after Arnold as they raced to catch up with the others. Kevin knew that Arnold did truly know Naba's name, but never once had he called her the right thing. It was quite sweet to him, that Arnold had so many nicknames for his girlfriend. And Naba didn't seem to mind, either. He sort of wished that he had someone like that to call him all sorts of various names. It seemed nice.

After a few more blocks of walking, the four of them parted ways, Naba and Arnold going one way and Connor and Kevin stopping outside the Price residence.

Kevin took a deep breath before turning to Connor. "Hey, Con... I just wanted to let you know that I'm perfectly fine with talking to you about... everything that's been going on with me. You have fully earned my trust."

Connor smiled widely at that. "Really?"

"Yeah," Kevin smiled back. Why were his smiles so gosh darn contagious?

"Well that definitely makes me feel good, that you trust me now. And I promise, anything that you tell me, I will keep it to myself and only to myself. I am here to clean up messes, not create them."

"Thanks. But, um, we should probably head inside. Plus, you're shivering," Kevin noted.

Connor rubbed his arms. He was feeling a bit cold. "Well, it is the middle of November, after all. How're you not shivering?"

"Guess I just don't get cold as easily as you do," Kevin shrugged. "Now, come on. We don't need you getting a cold."

They headed inside the house, where the Price family was hanging around the living room like usual. Though Mrs. Price was in the kitchen, most likely making dinner, with the help of one of her daughters. They both said a quick hello to them before heading up the stairs, to which Kevin invited Connor over to his own bedroom so that they could talk in private.

Kevin sat near the headboard as Connor took a seat at the end of the bed. "So... what exactly has been bothering you lately?"

Kevin thought long and hard as he tried to figure out how to answer him. "I guess it's just the fact that everyone expects so much out of me. I'm supposed to be the greatest Mormon of all time or whatnot. And I want to be a role model for my younger siblings, too. But if I'm being quite honest... I don't entirely agree with that religion. But if I told my parents that, they'd be so disappointed in me. My family seems to hate me enough as it already is."

"Why do you think they hate you?" Connor asked, remembering his conversation weeks ago with Mrs. Price, about how much she loved and cared for her son.

"They're basically sending me to a therapy session by bringing you here! I mean, obviously they think I'm broken, and they want to fix me. Probably because they think I'm a failure."

"Have you ever taken into consideration that they want to 'fix you' because they just want to become connected with you again?"

Kevin thought about that. "Did-did they really say that?"

Connor nodded. "Because they do care about you. They just want to find out what's wrong and fix it so that they can become close with you again."

Kevin smiled lightly, but it quickly faded away. "And they think that problem is me being gay?"

"Well, possibly, they're not entirely sure though-"

Kevin scoffed. "I figured. What proof do they even have, anyway? I never once have done anything gay, nor had gay thoughts," he lied, making sure to avoid Connor's gaze.

"Well, we have been taught our whole lives that being gay is bad. Surely you know this. But maybe you're just in a rebellious state so-"

"You're just as bad as the rest of them!" Kevin snapped. "What makes being gay so bad, anyway? Just because two people love each other? Is that too much for you to handle?"

"Kevin, please, I-"

"No! Just because you don't understand anything about it doesn't mean you have to go around and spread your opinions about people!"

Connor stared at him, completely silent. His glare hurt much more than words ever could. "And how do you know that I don't understand anything about it, huh? Who's to say that is the exact reason why I want to forget my past? You don't know anything about me. So instead of instantly jumping to conclusions, why don't you actually think before automatically starting a yelling match." He stood up, turning to go walk out the door before looking back at Kevin once more. "I hope you're happy that you've caused a rift between us once again. That seems to be all you ever do."

Then he walked away, leaving Kevin all alone once more.