Cross-border Merger

Sense of Belonging

A few days before leaving India, I talked to Mr. Ahluwalia about something that had bugged me from the second I had gotten the formal communication that I was accepted to be a part of the batch of 120 students who were going to take this Diploma course with me. When everyone kept congratulating me, I was thinking if I actually deserved them. Mr. Ahluwalia too congratulated me but the second I thanked him, he knew something was off and I confided in him.

"Sir, I have been a transfer kid. I had to change multiple schools in different cities but I got in some of the best schools every time after passing their tests and interviews. When it came to college, I passed the competitive exam and got into a National Law University. I have always felt proud of my accomplishments and of the fact that I achieved them because of my my capability, not because of monetary donations or recommendations of people.

For the first time, I feel like I don't deserve this. Please don't get me wrong, I am so happy and grateful that I get to go to Queen Mary and study which is something I have always dreamed of. But it feels like I'm getting to do this only because of you and Mr. Daniels and not because of me."

I kept fiddling with my watch while I said all this. As soon as I was done, he cleared his throat and said. 

"Sanyukta do you know why I had suggested Charles that you should apply to QMUL?"

At this I looked up and shook my head since I had no clue why.

He continued, "It's because QMUL doesn't take people in if they don't deserve to get in. I wouldn't lie to you and say that we had nothing to do with your admission but the only help that you got from us was that QMUL accepted your application even after the deadline. However, we did not pay a buck extra to get you admitted. Your application, resume and statement of purpose did that job. So, what i mean to say is enjoy your admission because you earned it. It didn't come to you on a silver platter."

Standing in front of the doors of the lecture hall, this is the first thing I think of and that is all the confidence I need before stepping in.

The Professor walked in as soon as I entered the hall and so, I sat on the first empty chair that I saw and started taking notes. The lecture ended in an hour and let's just say, I have forgotten how I used to sit listening to other people go on during my undergraduate study. I couldn't stop before I let out a sigh. 

"Yeah, that was definitely heavier for a first lecture" the person next to me said.

The lecture was so engaging that I didn't even see who I was sitting next to. I let a small laugh at his comment.

"Hi! I'm Calum." He extended his hand.

I shook his hand and replied, "Sanyukta. You can call me Yukta."

He smiled back, "Well Yukta. It's nice to meet you. I'm sorry I have to push off real quick but see you tomorrow."

"Oh yeah sure! No problem! See you!"

With that he left and I grabbed my things for my next lecture. I am supposed to be having 4 lectures everyday according to the schedule that I picked up in the morning and all I prayed was that I can get through all of them nicely.

Turns out the next three lectures were actually fun but due to continuous classes I couldn't interact with many people on the today. 

I walked out of the gates knowing Finn would be waiting to pick me up. I spot him soon and get in the car.

"So, how was your day?" Finn asked.

I smiled and replied, "It's weird since it's just the first day but... I think I belong here."