Everybody Finds Out

Part 4

Stevie's first day with the band didn't go exactly the way Lindsey had imagined it. He had hoped for a fun, lighthearted atmosphere, for swapping of road stories, just for the overall excitement of being reunited. Lindsey would never blame this on Harry, but he knew that Stevie always had her guard up if the three of them were together. He couldn't blame her, but he wished for things to turn for the better. 

Making his way into his room, Lindsey stopped by the slightly ajar door to Stevie's. He saw the room was dimly lit and he reached for the door handle, then stopped himself. Should he knock? He probably should. Instead, Lindsey cleared his throat loudly, letting her know, he was coming in.

The sight in front of him, warmed Lindsey's heart. He smiled, seeing Harry cuddled up to his mother, his curly head on her chest as she slowly combed through his hair, her other hand holding a children's book, which she had read for a bedtime story. Lindsey didn't move an inch, keeping quiet, trying to communicate with Stevie with his eyes.

Suddenly, Harry stirred and his eyes shot open. "Daddy!"

"Oh, thanks, Linds. He'd almost fallen asleep." Stevie sighed heavily, but he didn't think she was actually mad at him.

"I'm sorry, I just wanted to check in on you two." Lindsey smiled sheepishly, feeling slightly guilty.

"Daddy, stay here." Harry sat up and patted the empty space on the bed. 

There was nothing else Lindsey would have rather done in that situation, but he'd learned not to assume that he could. Again, his eyes shifted over to Stevie, who gave him a barely noticeable nod of her head.

Lindsey quickly situated himself beside Harry and the boy was instantly attached to his father's side. With his back turned to Stevie, Harry blindly sought out her hand and she wrapped her arm around him, not unaware that her fingers were sandwiched in between the pair.

"Read me story." Harry looked up at Lindsey and that look could melt the coldest of hearts.

Lindsey reached behind Stevie, his hand brushing over her hip, to grab the book. Once he started from the beginning, she zoned out. Those things that felt too much like something two loving parents would do for their child, they were the hardest. She used to allow herself to enjoy them, to pretend that this was their reality. However, Lindsey always left to go home eventually and with time it simply became too much. 

Without realizing it, Stevie had been nearly lulled to sleep by Lindsey's voice along with Harry. She didn't notice that he had finished reading and their son was sound asleep. Only when Lindsey's thumb brushed over the back of her hand, she returned to the present and quickly withdrew her hand from his touch.

"Can we talk?" Lindsey whispered.

"I don't want to fight with you."

He sighed. "I don't want that either, that's why I said, talk."

Afraid that the raising volume of their whispers were going to wake Harry up again, Stevie carefully moved away from the boy and Lindsey followed her suit. Again, as quietly as possible, she closed the door and, without even thinking about it, grabbed Lindsey by the hand to lead them somewhere away from the sleeping 3-year-old.

"Do you want to set some boundaries?" Lindsey decided to just out with it.

"Do I want to set some boundaries?" Stevie repeated his question, giving herself a few seconds to think about it. "Do we seriously need that?"

"I don't know, do we? Everything I say, seems to irritate you. It seemed like my touch burned you. I don't know, how to be around you, Stevie. I hate it." He admitted easily as they sat next to each other, some distance between them.

"It's not you." Stevie spoke up after a moment. "It's me." Lindsey frowned, waiting for her to elaborate. "I've missed you. And you're wrong, your touch feels too good, but I can't get myself involved with you again, Lindsey. It hurts worse with each time we have to say goodbye."

He didn't like what he was hearing, but he understood. "I get that, I really do, but then, at least be honest with me, okay? I know that I tend to get carried away."

"But you can't get mad at me if I'm honest with you." Stevie glanced at him, presenting him with a condition of her own. "You know that I always get this way, when it's all three of us..."

Lindsey moved closer to her and reached for her hand, lacing their fingers together. Stevie didn't push him away this time. "So do I."

"Lori is going to look after Harry, while we're working. I just brought him along for a few days." She said.

"And I'm extremely happy that you did, Steph. I wish-"

"Uh-uh." Stevie shook her head, pressing a finger against his lips. "Let's not do the I wish thing."

"Okay." Lindsey nodded his agreement, lowering her hand from his mouth, and changed the topic. "You seem tired."

"I am." She stifled a yawn.

Lindsey rose to his feet, bringing Stevie up with him, his arm wrapped around her shoulders. "Come on, let's get you to bed."

Stevie kept quiet, but she wished, she could have asked Lindsey to stay with her as easily as Harry did not an hour ago.