Undone

Manchineel

A tree is growing inside of me

Jagged limbs wrapping around my organs

Pointed fingers with long talons

Puncture my insides with poison

I cry at night fist beating the drum

In my stomach

Harsh and unforgiving in its rhythm

Each hit pounding a different tone

Of deprivation

As the drum rapidly shrinks

Viscous sap runs through my veins

Liters of venom pump my heart

With each beat my body is laden with chains

Mutilating alleviates the feeling of worthlessness

Threatening to tear my fragile mind apart

Reflections nurture the caustic fruits

Born from self- hate and the need to torture

Myself

There are days that I want to be rid of this disorder

I swallow the seeds to remain mute

And wait for my hunger to quell

I can feel the tree growing stronger

I am shadowed in its shade

It feeds on my flesh and bone with a voracious hunger

I lay myself down at its base when my stomach

Becomes completely concave

My withered heart changes beats and the time between takes longer

And longer

Tired of the prolonged torment I lick the milky white sap

Immediately I feel my heart plummet

Crumbling under my burden

I fade away

Darkness encompasses my vision

I can feel relief blossoming

Finally my hunger has diminished