Worth the Risk (a Matthew Gray Gubler fanfic)

Chapter Twenty Nine

Nervousness floods my stomach as I walk into Charlie's office on Saturday afternoon, right as I'm leaving for the day. Today is the day that I tell him... I need the week off. Hopefully, I won't shit my pants, metaphorically.

"Hey Charlie. I need to talk to you about something." I say as I plop down in the chair in front of his desk.

He looks up from his computer, "Sure. What's up?"

I gulp, "I just got a call this morning from my grandma. We have a family emergency with my grandpa and she needs me to come home. Of course you know, my family lives five and a half hours away so... I will need the week off. It's very important."

I've never been great at lying to Charlie, but he never questions it. Let's hope this time he won't.

"Oh God. Okay, that's fine. Just let me know if you need anything. I've got you covered for the week." He says, looking genuinely concerned.

I give him a somber look, feeding into the 'sad, family emergency' story. "Thank you so much, Charlie. I owe you."

"Just let me know when you're back. I hope everything goes well." Charlie says.

I walk out of the office, thanking him again. When I get to my car, I text Matthew to let him know.

Hey, we're good to go! My manager has me covered for the week. I am gonna stay at my place tonight so that I can pack. Let me know tonight when we will meet, and where, tomorrow. :)

I put my phone in my purse and drive home. I'm singing at the top of my lungs, windows down and the wind blowing through my hair.

This is going to be the best week ever.

•••••••••••••••

Around 7pm, I get a text from Matthew.

Sorry, I fell asleep while putting together the class work for the week. Anyway, I will pick you up at the dorms tomorrow morning at 8am. I can't wait to spend this week with you.

A smile spreads across my face as the thought of spending an entire week with Matthew, all alone. I know that I shouldn't be so excited because of the whole situation. But, I can't help it! I have been so much happier since I met Matthew. For the past month, I haven't been as stressed and I have been laughing a lot more than normal. He just makes loving him so easy.

Wait, hold on. I didn't mean to say love. No. Of course I like the guy... I wouldn't want to spend a week, in a place I've never been before, with him if not. But love? No, it's out of the cards. In a perfect world, we would be in love, get married and have kids. Unfortunately this is not that world. This world is cruel and hateful. It won't end up the way I would like for it to.

It sucks. But that's reality.

Part of the deal of this relationship was to not fall in love. But, as Big Time Rush says... I'm halfway there...

••••••••••••••

At around 4am, I wake up in a pool of my own sweat. The sound of my scream jolted me awake at this ungodly hour. The recurring nightmare has returned, and this time I saw the whole thing.

The bad part? I still couldn't tell who my assailant was.

It all seems so familiar to me. Yet, no answers. No one here to comfort me like there usually is.
I lay here, all alone, only for my mind to wander back to the horrid image of my assault as a child. I need to get my mind off of it. So, I get up and make sure everything is packed before hopping in the shower. The steam from the water helps to clear my mind. The vividness of the dream is really getting to me. It's never been so real or felt so real. It was so different this time and I just want answers.

I get out of the shower feeling a lot better. When I check my phone, it is now 5:15 am. I didn't realize that I was in the shower for so long. I guess that's why I'm all shriveled up. I dry my hair and put on a little makeup so I will actually look presentable.

While I'm waiting for the time to pass, I turn on the tv. Watching reality tv train-wrecks are the source of my happiness. They make me seem like my life is at least halfway normal.

After a couple of hours of 90 Day Fiancé, it is finally 7:30am. I text Matthew.

Let me know when you are on your way. I will be ready and at the side entrance by the parking lot.

I press send and make myself a bowl of cereal while I wait. I hear my phone buzz, signaling a text. Assuming that it's Matthew, I look at my phone. It's not him... it is a blocked number.

Unknown: Hi

Wtf?

Me: Who is this?

Unknown: You know who this is, Haley.

Okay... who the fuck is playing this stupid ass trick on me? I don't have time for this shit.

Me: No... I don't... and to be honest I couldn't care less who this is. Don't text me.

Unknown: ...okay.

As soon as that text is received, I get one from Matthew.

Here. Where are you?

Shit, I got distracted. I grab my things and run out the door, locking it behind me. I stop by the front desk to let my dorm manager know that no one will be in our dorm for the next week. I jog out of the side door, seeing a car waiting for me, Matthew at the wheel. I open the door to the backseat and throw my bags in, then climb in the passengers seat.

Matthew says, "Are you good? You seem a little flustered."

"Yeah. I'm good. Just got caught up making sure I had everything. Anyway... let's get going!" I say with excitement.

Before he pulls away he grabs my face and brings it to his. He gives me a sweet kiss on the lips. I smile, "Well it surely is a good morning now."

He laughs and pulls out of the parking lot.
"By the way, I got a rental car for the trip. I really didn't want to put so many more miles on my car, and I'm sure you didn't on yours either. This was just the best option."

"Oh it's nice and roomy. I can kick my seat back and take a nap without any problems!" I giggle.

Matthew says, "Go ahead. But, you will miss out on my road trip playlist. I made it a couple of years back when I moved to California. It just makes the trips easier."

That's the cutest thing. I can just imagine Matthew all by himself jamming to songs. The windows rolled down, the wind in his luscious hair.

"I wouldn't want to miss that. Maybe I will hold off on the nap for a bit." I turn to Matthew, giving him a wide-toothed smile.

He clears his throat, "Um... I-I put a few songs on there... for you."

I bite my lip to hold back my smile, "Oh you did? How sweet of you, Dr. Gray."

"I remembered your love of cheesy 70's/80's love songs. Luckily, I already had a few on there. But I did add a couple more." He lets out an anxious breath.

He turns on the playlist. One of my favorite cheesy 70's/80's songs... I Don't Want to Miss a Thing by Aerosmith.

"Ah! I love this one! How did you know?" I'm excited about this song.

He smiles and shrugs, "Lucky guess? It's one of my favorites too."

We both sing the song together at the tops of our lungs. Matthew rolls the windows down, letting the cool wind blow through the car. Different genres of songs begin to play, all of them being fairly enjoyable. He has good taste.

An hour into the 8 hour trip, I start to get a little sleepy and Matthew notices. He turns down the music, leaving it softly playing in the background. He rolls the windows up. I lay my seat back a little, just to get more comfortable.

As I doze off I start thinking, he invited me on this trip, he is paying for everything and he won't let me pay for anything. But it's the little things like adding songs to his playlist that make him think of me. It makes me wonder... is this starting to get serious for him, too?