A Seam Within the Galaxy • Kylo Ren

Ch.29

Nightfall of the first day was rather dull, as compared to the exhilarating time the night before. The day had been long after our embrace in my small room, setting out a second time to do a follow up sweep of the land around us. Ren had wanted to ensure no other children were present, as well as any Resistance members that happened to be scouting us out.

As we had searched, I kept the idea of the little girl out of my mind, hurriedly thinking of anything else so the Commander wouldn't pick up on what I had done, betraying him as well as the Order. I hoped I had tricked her mind into moving stealthily enough for none of us to notice her. I hoped she had found her family by the time we set out a second time. I hoped to the gods above that I would never see her again, for her sake.

Because the presence of Officer Torris and the troopers proved to be difficult to evade, there weren't any more intimate moments between the Commander and I for the remainder of the day as well as all throughout the night. Although we could have managed a little something by nightfall, during the earlier hours of the night, I sensed that the Commander knew I was tired, leaving me be, despite a few gentle whispers through the force as I slept, as he had stayed awake for a bit longer than I.

I woke in the morning to face a strange pang of guilt I had hoped to do away with as I had fallen asleep last night, falling regretful of the actions I had gone through with yesterday with that little girl. The bitter feeling resided within my chest and swam alongside the ever-growing feelings I had felt for Commander Ren. It was strange to experience both—I tried my best to focus on the latter, hoping not to give Ren the wrong idea of my extent of feelings for him.

After having had enough of lying in bed, picking apart the details of the day before, I rose to pad my way to the bathroom. I stripped, I showered, I dried my hair and dressed in a fresh pair of pants... yet the feeling remained, tugging at the ends of my sanity, burrowing deep within my mind. I feel the headache coming on, leaning against the counter before the mirror to brace for it.

It strikes me down, harder than before, my backside sliding against the bathroom sink as I hiss and groan. I rub my temples, feeling myself wane in and out of this consciousness despite how hard I battle with my grip in this dimension.

It feels like demanding hands pulling me apart, driving me into this plain I had yet to ever experience. The feeling plagues me with nausea, as I had yet to fill my stomach with any kind of sustenance for the day. My neck growing loose, my head lolling back and forth over my shoulders. Then, I feel nothing but the pull outward. I still have trouble pinpointing the direction, or what it is on the other side that happens to be so demanding.

I know for sure that the force is around me as I spiral deeper into it, but it is not the same as past interactions. There is no give and take on this plain, there only seems to be one drive—getting me to the same playing field as whatever it was that called out to me.

A familiar, broadened set of gloved hands meet my body, lazing my head around as I slowly regain control over it, as well as the rest of my body. I lift my head to find the Commander, one large hand encompassing both of my own and forcibly pinning them together securely, as his other hand resides on my shoulder, having shaken me to gain my attention.

He looks bewildered, even a bit disturbed as his eyes flash down to my arms, just as I notice the uncomfortable burn that stems from them. There I see it, red splotches and markings covering the broken skin on my left forearm. Pieces of flesh left hanging after having dug incessantly into my skin. I frown, noticing the small chunks of skin collected under the beds of my nails. I roll them between my fingers as my breathing slows, gaining more control of myself and the situation as I see what I have done to myself.