Besieged - Ji Changmin

36

Blinded by my hatred towards the girl, I rant on about her to Changmin as soon as we get home. He quietly listen to me and nod his head, encouraging me to go on.

"So you still like Kevin?"

"Wait- no! You didn't hear me? She tried to hit on you! Knowing damn well that you and I are in a relationship!"

Then Changmin laugh like a maniac leaving me confused.

"Is that what bother you the most? Losing me to her? If that is the case then you don't have to worry about it. Besides I told you many times not to hang out with her before. You weren't listening to me. I could tell from my hunch that she was a bad news from the first moment that I saw her"

I fold my arms acting annoyed that he wasn't sympathizing with me and instead put the blame on me.

He sigh once he notice me and came in front of me.

"Then what do you want me to do?"

I scoff and stood up, "I don't know. I just don't like her pretty little face" I wish I didn't say that, and then I stomp my way to my room letting him know how upset I was.

He didn't even visit me at night, giving me silent treatment and I was far than annoyed at how little attention I was getting, I hated it.

The next morning I didn't even try to greet him and angrily went to university by myself. Just a month more and we will graduate, I was only happy at the thought of that.

I met Kevin on lunch and watch him go sad the whole time, I wasn't in my best mood either so I didn't try cheering him up either. Then we heard gossiping next to our table.

"Someone threw acid on Mira's face?"

"Oh shit! That's so horrible"

"How is she?"

"She's alive, but her face..."

I widen my face and see Kevin going white. He knew, that's why he was feeling sad but he couldn't tell me because he never told me about them dating.

I quickly stood up and rush to different places searching for him. I finally did when I saw him hanging out with Juyeon and some of his friends.

"Your girl's here"

All of them turn their head to me and I awkwardly smile at them.

"Can we talk?", I fake smile at him too and tuck on his sleeves.

"Sure babe"

After pulling him away in a quieter place, I grab my hair and curse angrily.

"Why did you do that?", I confront him but I know it was my own fault. I know I pushed him into doing it but it was so hard for me to accept the truth that I causes the incident.

"You said you didn't like her face. Even though it wasn't 'pretty', I had to make you happy"

I stare at him and laugh. I laugh for so long that it was followed by tears as I breakdown in the end.

"Kevin is sad and Mira lost her face. I ruined two people's life. I'm a monster", I cup my face and cried.

Changmin pull me in his arms and pat my back. Why do I have to be so jealous when I know that Changmin only love and listen to me? Why was I so doubtful like a petty girl? Why couldn't I even trust myself?

"Don't cry. Is it because Kevin is sad?"

I shook my head, too tired to already start a new conversation again. And besides, when will he understand that I no longer care about Kevin that way? Kevin is my friend and a friend only. When will he stop feeling insecure about my feelings to him?

When will I stop feeling that he actually didn't love me anymore?