𝐃𝐢𝐚𝐫𝐲 𝐎𝐟 𝐀 𝐌𝐢𝐬𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐩𝐞

FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 20

Parties are wild indeed.

I had to change my personality and go on wild mode. I think I  may have gone too much into it because I  now feel guilty for the things I  just did.

Well, for the sake of experience I  tried my best to let myself loose without any worries about the consequences but after all that happened, I  feel sick.

It all started with me entering with my outfit. I was more than glad to know that it was the right outfit because Ariana immediately  complimented me when she saw me.

I looked around hoping that I  wouldn't see anyone I  am familiar with, but immediately  my eyes spotted a person I   know .

Jaden Parks.

I would never guess that he would go to party. Anyways, that sounds hypocritical coming from me but I  mean ,I  thought he was innocent .

Why am I even making a fuss out of this ? It's just a party and not all parties are bad.

But this one was. It was a one hell of a bad party and I  can't lie about that.

People were drinking heavily and others were smoking. For a while, I  felt very uncomfortable and even though I  stayed for less than an hour, I  already felt like leaving.

Nothing was worse than the drinks offered. It was all alcohol and even what they claimed to be fruit juice was clearly alcohol diluted with fruit juice.

Thankfully, I  was proactive . I carried a bottle of water in my bag so that whenever I  get thirsty I  could take water instead. Smart move right? I should say it is, but it makes me feel  like a loser.

I should have taken the alcohol and then go on some hangover or something but I  am not one to take such risks, especially risks that can never benefit me. So I  chose to be the loser that takes water at a party.

For a while, I  got bored especially because I  was trying not to get into any trouble . But after a while I got tired of being the good girl. I needed  to try to have fun for once. Being a good girl all the time isn't good for the health, so I  decided to try to participate in some of the party games.

I saw a group of people that were playing spin the bottle. So I  decided to join, ignoring all the consequences . I never thought people at parties even consider such lame games.

For a while , the bottle  wasn't landing on anyone. I was just about to get up when Jaden  decided to join. Him joining the game made things seem rather interesting.

I sat for a while watching others smooch whenever the bottle landed on them which slapped the sense right into me.

Why was I  even participating? I  know I  have a lot of experience in kissing my hand but not kissing an actual person.

Just when I  was so caught up in thought ---the bottle landed on me and ---

Jaden.

At that point I  wanted to bail out but what would people think of me if I  did. I know I  do not care what people think of me but it wasn't  only about peoples view of me.

It was about my lack of experience . For once I  needed to practice on someone. Let  all my hand practice come to use.

If I  was going to keep being in the drama club, I  needed to know how to kiss and I  wouldn't mind doing it on Jaden.

So I  did what any weirdo like me would do, I allowed all my kissing practice to guide me and then I  slowly leaned in close, allowing my lips to brush against his, tentatively . I felt the warmth of his soft lips against mine which surprisingly gave me butterflies .

Because everyone was watching us, I  couldn't keep pretending to know what I  was doing, so I  immediately stopped kissing him and without looking at Jaden , I  got up and left.

I know, it was a really bold move to run away . But after kissing Jaden , I  came to realise that I  may have gone too far. So I  left the party immediately .

But now I  feel terrible, not because I  ran away like a coward, but because I  made such a bold move in kissing Jaden .

I am not at all guilty for that action, but I  am worried that he may have noticed. What if he noticed that I  am a bad kisser?

Even worse, what if the people around noticed that I  am a bad kisser?

Honestly, I  feel really bad about embarrassing myself like that but let's  look at the positives, at least I  got to know how it feels like to kiss someone.

Isn't  that all that matters?