✨ A Little Bit of Magic || READER X RAY || The Promised Neverland

✨ Chapter Thirty Four

I felt my eyes grow wet with tears. I don't know if it was frustration, anger, or some sort of betrayal. "Are you going to confess to him? Are you going to confess to Oliver?"

His black eyes widened in shock. Zack stopped in his tracks, turning to face me. "How- How do you know?" I grit my teeth, the tears starting to overflow. I need to take a deep breath. I can't cry. I can't cry here, in front of him, at this party with hundreds of people. I blinked away the droplets of water, trying to keep my quivering lips steady. "Nigel t-told me. Just then, when he was D-DJ'ing." "I didn't want you to find out like this." God, it wasn't helping. The tears multiplied with each passing second, the things he was saying not stopping their flow. My face grew warm with anger, sadness, and frustration. "I- I thought y-you trusted me. I thought- I thought I could trust you. You mean so- so much to me," I choked out, in between sobs. Suddenly, my cold, trembling body was enveloped in someone's warmth. "Z-Zack?" I whispered, a little startled by his unexpected action. It made my heart churn. "I'm- I'm sorry, y/n. I'm so sorry I didn't tell you. But please, let me explain before you make any decisions. I still- I still want to be your friend. Please."

What good would this do me? Was it going to be a rejection? A plead of obliviousness? I would end up hurt. That's what people always do. Hurt each other. Like that person who killed my parents. Like Emma and Norman's meaningless fights. Like Ray, who had abandoned me when I needed him most. And now Zack. I was happier when I didn't have "friends". I've become soft. I can't bring myself to say "no" to his puppy eyes. Zack... Zack truly looked upset. But why? I took a deep breath, allowing him to lead me back to the balcony we were on for fresh air.

"You don't have to talk or reply to anything I say. I'm just asking you to listen." I stumbled my way to the railing, my shoelaces getting looser and looser by the second. God, I should've asked Emma to tie these before that fight before. "y/n, you said I mean a lot to you. And I know why." Here it comes. The rejection. "I was the first friend you made outside of Emma and Norman, right?"

I froze for a second. Just a second. I expected a "because you like me." But... Zack... He really doesn't know? He's- I- I'm completely at a loss for words.

"The truth is, y/n, that you mean a lot to me too. More than I could ever be to you. You're really the only person I feel like I can trust." He slowly stepped to my side, propping his head up on his hands, leaning very tiredly against the stone rail. "I've... I've been anxious, lately." He chuckled harshly, quickly correcting himself. "Not lately. Always. I've always been anxious. I've always thought someone could tell I liked boys. I always thought it was written across my face. I've always been afraid of being... alone. Different. But is it my fault for falling in love when Oli is so damn hot?" I giggled at that, noticing the small smile on his face. Zack really loved Oliver. Not me. I don't think he could ever see me the way he sees him. "You were the first person who would go out looking for me. You were the first person to like me for who I am. You weren't a crazy fan girl who wanted to kiss me, or fuck me, or use me for attention. You weren't a basic cheerleader afraid of chipping her nails or getting her hair wet. You ran into a god damn storm to ask me if I was okay. You hugged me in the rain, you supported me, you're really just- just different from everyone else."

It wasn't a rejection. But it hurt ten times worse. Zack, I like you. I'm in love with you. I wanted to kiss you. I wanted to be your special someone. But you already have one of those. And it's not me. I am a crazy fan girl. I am nothing that you say I am. I'm not different, I'm not special, I'm not anything to be praised.

"I didn't want to burden you, y/n. You've already done so much for me. You pulled me out of that dark place I was in and showed me how to have fun. You taught me how to take care of myself, how to love myself. And I know how much you've been hurting lately. Having to meet your darkest fear every day must be difficult. I didn't want to bother you with my affairs of the heart. But it looks like you got involved anyway. I'm sorry. For hiding this from you. I wanted to keep you from being hurt. But instead, I just made the pain a hundred times worse. Nothing I can do will make up for what I've done."

I wasn't- I wasn't mad at Zack. I loved Zack. And I probably still do. I can't get rid of feelings that easily,  and I'm the person who knows that best. I'm so used to having people being taken away from me. And yet... it somehow hurts more every time.

The bell tower struck eight pm. It was time for the Headmaster's speech and all that jazzy fun teacher shit I would ditch these events for. "I'm fine, Zack. I forgive you. I understand your reasoning, as upset as I am about it. Let's just have fun tonight and we'll talk about whatever we need to tomorrow. This is still my first party after all!" The black haired boy smiled softly, squeezing my left hand tightly. "And we're going to make it the best one ever, bestie." Yeah, this hurt. This hurt a lot. But I can get over it, right? He's just my first love.

Headmistress Isabella had taken center stage right in the middle of the event hall's elevated podium. "Happy Halloween, students of Grace Field Magic Academy! This is the four hundred and seventy third Halloween celebrated at this prestigious school, for gifted young wizards and witches such as yourself. Usually, I'd take the stage to recount a tall tale of the past year. But today, I'd like to tell you a story from long, long ago. When October 31st wasn't the fun loving, costume wearing, candy eating holiday it is today." She spoke with an almost unnerving enthusiasm. I'd never seen Headmaster Isabella so... hyper..? Is that the word? Her violet eyes scanned the crowd, as if looking for someone. And maybe it was me. Because we locked gazes instantly. She grinned, giving me a small wave before continuing her story. "Almost a millenia ago, there was a war. Shocking, right?" A few students giggled, but I kept my mouth zipped tight. I had a bad feeling about this. And my right hand clenched tightly in my pocket was starting to burn with an overbearing humidity. My wand... Why was it doing this? Zack noticed my discomfort and gave my left hand a small tug. "Are you okay?" He whispered. I nodded a "yes", but holy fuck, my mind was racing in a thousand different directions. "Said War was a battle between two races. The elves and the humans. A crucial part of or history we'd almost all forgotten. Or chosen not to remember. The Battle of Elvensdom was the bloodiest, most brutal war any living species had fought on this earth. The fauna and merpeople went extinct as a result of participating in the bloodshed. And the ending was rather unclimactic. A treaty. A promise."

I know this tale. I know this story. But they way Headmistress Isabella told it... It seemed so much more sinister.

"On October 31st, the Promise of Elvensdom was created between the humans and elves, to stop the war. It was overseen by the dwarves, and what was created of the treaty was a Zynocule. Or in simpler terms, a gemstone. A gemstone of blood sacrifice. The leaders of both the elves and humans gave away their right hands for the Promise, and the ruby was created. It was blood red and encapsulated in Dragonspine steel- the strongest metal known the mankind. But the story does not end there." The headmistress giggled, giving me another glance. "For Halloween, the day of ghosts and corpses, couldn't have been derived from a happy ending." I never finished the chapter. I remember now. It had slipped my mind. The page was torn out of my textbook, and Ray had come to test me. What Isabella is about to say is the true ending of Elvensdom. "That same night, on October 31st, the humans had genocided Elvensdom. They had created a new magic rivaling their more gifted counterparts. A magic built on distrust. A magic built on envy. A magic built on hate. A death magic. And they had killed every elf they'd laid their eyes on. Some had managed to escape, even finding a way to keep their bloodlines alive today. But they hide. Afraid of what will happen to them if society had ever found their true identities." The burning in my pocket had started to settle down, and so did the crowds shocked chattering. "The Promise of Elvensdom is lost. It's somewhat a joke of an artifact, as it's history was brief and completely ridiculed. But I'm sure that the little red ruby is still burning. Anger, sadness, betrayal... Don't you think that's what it must feel right now? Completely heartbroken?"

After that, Isabella had dismissed the students to go back to partying. But something inside my chest felt tighter than before.