𝕌ℕ𝕋𝕀𝔼𝔻 | Minsung

☆1☆

~ < please never fall in love again - ollie mn > ~

The mud didn't bother him. The wet grass didn't bother him. The cold drops of rain didn't bother him. What bothered him was the flower that wilted over, on top of the rough dirt of her grave, reminding him of the sprout of life she once was. He longed for the flower to bloom even in the rain. He longed for her to live even in her sickness. He longed for him to at the very least wilt away with her, but he couldn't. He promised he would stay, he promised he would try to move on.

He was standing, pulling his navy hood over his wet hair. His school bag was held to his chest to keep as much of it dry as possible. He knew his clothes could only do so much to keep him dry and so he stopped caring, sitting on top of the grass, letting the rain fall on him. The water in the fabric of his converse were soaking into his socks, giving him the groggy feeling he always hated. He looked at the grave reading the letters carved into it's stone over and over, but no matter how many times he read it, it wouldn't change what it said.

'Han Jiwon
A daughter, a sister, a fighter.
1997-2013'

"Hey..." He mumbled into the wind. When he spoke he looked at the ground in front of him, his body facing the grave. "I'm going into senior year soon..." He looked to his side, the look of guilt lingering in his eyes. "I'm sorry you won't be able to see me graduate. I know you always said you wanted to be the first person to clap for me when I got on stage. But you also said you wanted me to do my best, even if you weren't around to see it. I made that promise and I promise I'll keep it, okay?" Jisung felt his jaw tense, listing these things out loud. "I um...still haven't gotten my red string...who would've guessed?" He chuckled to himself, but his humour was bitter. Maybe at one point it was a joke between him and his sister that he didn't have a soulmate but Jisung was beginning to realise, it was just sad. "I can't stay too long, Eunsah's back at the house and she won't be very happy. I'll come back tomorrow though, so...don't go anywhere." He quickly lifted himself up, still clamping his backpack to his chest and turned on his heels to leave, but after a few steps he turned back to get a few last words in. "I love you." He whispered, knowing all to well he would never hear them back, not from anyone. He walked out of the cemetery with the grey feeling, as he always did. It wouldn't be long before that grey feeling would return but he could only hope something would replace it soon, something that didn't hurt so much.

Picking up the key under the welcome mat, he unlocked the front door. When he walked in he became aware his wet shoes were leaving muddy splotches where he stood. He pulled his shoes off, throwing them beside the door. He was still drenched as a few drops of water still dripped from his clothes onto the floor. He looked around the room to see if anyone was in earshot but soon realised no one had even noticed him come in. On the bright side, he didn't have to explain for the millionth time where he'd been.

He made a quick trip to the upstairs bathroom, changing his clothes so he wasn't so soaked. With his wet clothes gone and his dry ones on, he could relax on his bed. Though he only got a few seconds of peace as someone opened the door.

"So, you finally decided to come home." Both of them sub-consciously looked to the digital alarm clock on Jisung's bedside table, reading five forty-five pm.

Sitting up on his bed, Jisung looked down to his feet.

"You know, it would be nice if you didn't walk around in the rain. I could have driven you." She spoke with a weary voice, balancing on the edge of a harsher tone.

"You wouldn't have let me go at all if I asked." Jisung didn't make eye contact, knowing the look that she wore by memory.

"I don't see why you have to see her every chance you get. Why do you have to keep putting yourself through that?" Jisung almost found it amusing how she didn't understand a single thing he went through everyday.