My Lucky Star (One Direction Affection: Book 2)

29: Clearing the Air

♧ 29: Clearing the Air ♣

Well, this couldn't be anymore awkward.

About an hour ago, I thought that this was the best idea I've ever had in my life. But now? Not so much. I kinda wish that Harry never pointed out my flaw, that way I could just go on thinking I was right for leaving. However, now that I know, I can't just let it go. 

So, that's why I'm here. 

That's why I'm sitting uncomfortably across from Jessica and Andrew; the two people that I thought I could trust with anything. Of course, they look completely the same, having only been two months since the last time I saw them both. That is if you don't count the small run in I had with Andrew at One Stop. I don't.

I've been sitting here for a solid three minutes just in pure silence. I don't know if they're waiting for me to speak or if they're speaking and I just can't hear them. Right now, sitting in the familiar surroundings of Jessica's quaint apartment, I can't help but remember when there was a time that I came here regularly. However sitting here with Andrew next to Jessica rather than me, it's hard to take in, even now.

It's safe to say that when I knocked on her door a few moments ago, Jessica was anything but surprised. It was all over her porcelain face. I was the last person she suspected to show up at her doorstep and in all honesty, waking up this morning, I didn't think I'd be here either. In fact, if we were following my plans, I'd still be in bed.

I nervously lick my lips as I shift in the couch, desperately trying to find a more comfortable position. However, there is none.

I sigh, "Um, so I think we can all agree how awkward this is," I mutter.

"It's not awkward," Jessica replies quickly. Too quickly, which meant that this is in fact very awkward for all of us. Not that I expect otherwise.

"Not awkward at all," Andrew tries to say convincingly.

I give them both a dead look. "Really?"

"Okay, this is very awkward," Jessica mumbles as she rubs the back of her neck.

"Extremely weird," Andrew agrees, and then adds. "But, we are glad that you're here."

I'm actually relieved to hear that. I was afraid that with my last run in with Andrew that they would both decide to hate my guts for shutting them out. Instead they welcomed me here, more than willing to sit through this awkward conversation. And for what? They have no idea why I'm here. Hell, do I even know why I'm here? I'm not entirely sure but I think that being here and clearing the air with Jessica and Andrew is the right thing. I don't know why but I know.

"Well, the reason I'm here is because I have to say something, and I know this is probably too late to even consider," I start off slowly, placing my hands on my knees. "But, I want to apologize to you both."

"Wait, what?"

I could tell that I had again caught them off guard. I would bet anything that they were under the impression that I came here demanding an apology. However, that was never my intention. Now I have no reason to be angry at them for this. I have no right because if I am, then that'll make me a hypocrite.

"You want to apologize?" Andrew repeats in pure disbelief. "To us?"

I nod, looking up at both of them. "I know that it's two months too late, but I really am sorry."

"But why?" Jessica asks looking at me in confusion. "You did nothing wrong. We should be apologizing to you."

"And you guys have been trying to, and I wouldn't let you," I point out, realizing that this is just another form of my 'Running Away' as Harry out it. "Every time either one of you tried calling, I would ignore it. I knew why you were calling and back then, an apology was the last thing I wanted from you two. I wanted nothing more than to pretend that my connection with you both didn't exist."