Mission Anonymous - Danisnotonfire (EDITING)

Chapter Six

6

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Stop. I need to stop myself.

It's been a week. I can't fall for him! I won't be able to kill him if I do. I cannot afford that. I also need this money. Mr. Boss and I made a deal before I left and I need this money for it.

I need this.

I can't love anyone.

I fipped onto my back in my bed and screamed into the pillow. "I hate him! I hate him! I hate Dan!" I tried convincing myself. It wasn't working. I didn't hate him. He was so beautiful...

And I had to kill him.

All this week we had eaten lunch together and taken walks. He was awkward and cute and I loved him.

Yeah.. I loved him.

I know I do but I just have to try to convince myself otherwise.

My DH mission iPhone went off with a familiar text tone. It was the one I had set for Dan. I sighed and got up. I took a deep breath and opened the message.

//Hey JJ. Wanna come by my flat later today?//
-Dan Howell just now

Of course I wanted to hang out with him. But I wanted to hang out with him as Ashley Silent, not Jaden Alex. I groaned and replied.

//Yes of course Daniel :) I can even stay the night? Haha jk only if you want cx//

I acted happy but I wasn't. Not at all. But I have to get over it. I know I have to get over it. But I can't. Phil isn't home this week so today is the day that I set up the cameras in his and Dan's room and tonight when he's asleep is when I'll set up everything else. It'll be a huge step for us. I should be happy for Savannah and I... Should.

But I'm not.

He replied very soon afterwards, as if he was waiting.

//Yeah sure you can stay the night :) //

Even better.

-

We started walking up the stairs to his flat. We were silent and I could tell he was nervous. I wasn't sure why though.

"Hey Dan, can I get changed in your room?" I asked. I was looking for a way to place the cameras in his room. "Yeah of course." He smiled at me. He still looked nervous. But why?

I took my backpack into Dan's room and locked the door behind me. My hands shook as I picked up the first camera.

As I placed them around the room I realized that if I don't kill Dan, I don't get the money I need. If that happens then I'll never get what he promised me. Even then, he'll just get killed by someone else. And if I do kill him, I'll have to live knowing that I killed an internet star and the only person I really cared about.

I'm going to lose either way...

Finally all the microphones and cameras were set up. I sighed. I was falling into a state of depression. I was honestly questioning my existence. This has never happened to me before.

I quickly got changed and walked out of the room and sat next to Dan on the couch. "Hey JJ. What's wrong? You look sad." Dan asked, concerned. I felt my eyes heat up and I got that horrible feeling in the back of my throat. Why was I going to cry? I had no reason to really. "Oh just questioning why I exist." My voice cracked at the end. He smiled. "I go through that all the time. Do you wanna order pizza? Will that make you feel better?"

Then I lost it.

I started bawling my eyes out. He hugged me close to him. It felt nice to be wrapped up in his arms. I wanted to stay here, but as Ashley...

All of today has just been depressing, hasn't it?

I just continued to cry. I don't usually cry but today was different. Savannah started whispering in my ear. "Ash, what happened? Why are you crying?"

Because Dan was so perfect. Because someday I had to kill him. Because of all the pressure. Because I have to live in secrecy. Because I can't have a social life. Because I'm forced to kill people. Because I'm so greedy. Because how how much I just fucking loved Dan and because my life is just so unfair!

"I wish I wasn't born." I sobbed into Dan's shirt. It was true. If I hadn't been born, I wouldn't have been forced to kill Dan or anyone else. Dan clearly had no clue why I was really crying. He just rubbed my back and made me feel better. And some day I had to erase this wonderful person from the earth.

"Well you were born so you're going to have to make the best of your life because you only have one." He said quietly to me. I smiled. He was so amazing. I fell asleep in his arms.

-

I woke up to Savannah speaking in my ear. "Ash. Wake up. I used the cameras in Dan's room to tell if he fell asleep or not and he did. Wake up. Time to put up the cameras and tell me why you were crying."

I opened my eyes and looked around the room. I was tucked into Phil's bed in his bedroom. I stretched and got up. I looked around for my backpack. "Ash?" Savannah asked. "Yeah, yeah. I'm awake." I said into the microphone that was still on my body. "Okay. So your backpack should be in the room. Somewhere. I saw him from the hallway camera you set up. Hey. What happened earlier?"

I sighed. "I can't talk to you about it. I'm sorry Wilkie. Maybe later." I replied. After putting up all the microphones and cameras in hidden places, I moved from Phil's room to the hallway and then down to the lounge. Eventually, I got the whole apartment.

"Uh... Ashley? Did you give your number to anyone other than Dan?" Savannah questioned. "No. Why would I? What happened?" I asked as I took my phone out of my pocket. I had a new message, and it wasn't from Dan.

"Wilkie are you reading this?" I stared shocked at my phone. I heard her typing away on her computer and I waited for a reply for her. "Track the message." I ordered. "Already on it Silent." She sounded focused.

I read the message over and over. Who sent this to me?

//We know you have gained much progress on the Daniel James Howell mission. We are not letting someone else get the 5 million, so watch your back//
-Blocked Number 3 minutes ago

I read it again. Savannah groaned. "Who ever this is is good! I can't track it!" She kept typing.

I nervously glanced over my shoulder, just to be safe. I knew I'd have to do this a lot more often now...

This mission is about to become a lot more harder.

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