Burn My Paranoia One Last Time

18. Letters of Opportunity

"Is that too cheesy?" I scratch my neck awkwardly, already feeling my palms get sweaty as I await my friends' responses.

"Rain, this is brill!" Joel exclaims.

"I second that, this is brill to the max! I didn't know you could write like that," Sloane grins and hands me back my letter.

"Aww, thanks ya'll," I chuckle softly and fold the paper, carefully sliding it into the envelope. I suck in my breath and stare out across the hustling hallway.

"I don't know if I can do this," I admit.

"Of course you can, that boy is going to fall head over heels for your poetry," Joel confirms confidently before shrugging. "And if he doesn't, well, he's an airhead and that's that."

"Haha Joel!" Sloane and I laugh.

"No, but like seriously," Sloane nods her head towards the other side of the hall. "You need to blitz before he gets to his locker. Now put some spit on that envelope and get your butt moving!"

I lick the envelope closed and follow her advice. It's true, his class is just a building away from this one. It should take him no more than five minutes to make it downstairs and through the hall, which usually isn't as busy by the time he arrives. Don't ask me why I know this. These are just things you learn.. by chance whenever your crush happens to be near.

My stark white sneakers tap across the checkered floor as I power walk through the crowd of people. I try to be as natural as possible, pretending that I'm simply dropping off something at my own locker.

I swirl my head around, holding the letter down next to my thighs, and double check that Darren isn't around. Perfect, he's nowhere in sight.

I take a deep breath and close my eyes, lifting the letter up in front of me. My heart is pounding so fast. In spite of myself, I kiss the letter "good luck" and quickly slide it into one of the slits of his locker. It slips down without obstruction and I smile.

I turn my head, still stuck in a daze, when suddenly I see Darren walking down the stairs with his friends. Oh crap!

A bead of sweat drips down my forehead as I look for an opening in the crowd. There! I bolt out immediately, nearly crashing head first into my friends. My sneakers make an embarrassing screech on the floor. I only pray that the sound is drowned out by the noisy bustle of students.

"Yo chill!" Joel holds me up, laughing to himself.

"Oh god, he didn't see me, did he?" I whirl around nervously, wiping my sweaty palms on my denim jeans.

"Nah you're good. Now watch, watch, watch!" Sloane whispers to me excitedly. "He's about to open his locker!"

"Aw man, I think I'm going to pass out," I groan and tighten the strings around my cropped hoodie.

I watch in anticipation as a glowing Darren waves goodbye to his buddies and begins to open his locker. I roll my knuckle on my chin nervously. How will he react? While I hope it's not a total dead giveaway, part of me secretly hopes he knows it's me and wants it to be me.

Just as Darren reaches for one of his textbooks, the envelope slips out into view before him. He raises an eyebrow and pulls it out from where it's slipped between the pages of the book. He turns it over in his hand curiously, his bright blue eyes pensive and thoughtful.

Sloane punches me in the shoulder as we side eye each other excitedly.

I purposely neglected writing on the envelope to maintain the aura of mystery.

I watch as he gingerly opens it and reads over the letter. It's not that long of a letter, but he takes a while. Finally, the corner of his lips turns up in a smile and he chuckles, running a hand through his chestnut hair shyly.

"He liked it!" I turn my back to the scene and pump my fist victoriously. I laugh as Sloane fangirls as quietly as she can next to me.

"Cheeuh! You go Rain!" Joel chimes in happily, offering me a low high five.

I slap his hand, unable to stop the goofy grin spreading across my face.

I turn back laughing, and our eyes meet for just a split second. It's like the world's gone and turned slow motion. In that split second, I can see him smiling, dimples and all. Gosh, he has the cutest dimples I've ever seen. I could stare all day long.

The moment is gone just as swiftly as it happened. He takes his book and shuts the locker, hiding the letter quite gracefully inside the textbook. And then he walks away.

"Well, I'd say that went well," Joel claps proudly.

"I wonder how long it'll take him to realize it's you," Sloane muses, shaking my shoulder playfully.

I laugh and shrug, remembering the way his eyes locked onto mine mere seconds ago. "I have no idea, we'll just have to wait and see. I do, however, have another piece of writing to deliver."

I reach into my backpack and pull out my scholarship application, which is stored neatly in a thin binder.

Joel rubs his nose and leans back against a locker while Sloane's eyebrows arch up.

"You better go deliver that soon before too many of those rich kids ask him," she warns me.

"On it. I'll see you guys in class soon!"

I wave and they wave back as I start down the hallway. Just as I'm about to speed up, I notice Holly passing by next to me. She's going on the direction opposite mine, towards Joel and Sloane.

I hide behind a locker to observe. This shouldn't take too long. I have to know what happens!

My mouth almost drops when I actually see her talking to them. She seems to be directing her attention to Joel mostly, with the occasional spiteful side glance at Sloane. Sloane crosses her arms and rolls her eyes impatiently, delivering another cocky one liner, no doubt.

Joel is smiling and nodding. Even from this distance, I can see his cheeks bloom a soft pink. He waves sheepishly at Sloane and walks away with Holly.

I am taken aback. How did that happen so fast?

Sloane isn't the type to mind being alone, so I'm curious to see what she does now. She flips Joel off as he walks away. Not that he cares to notice, though. I watch her walk into the ladies restroom. I suppose that's that. Whatever happened here, Joel will have to explain.

I make my way to the corridor where Mr. Dacus' classroom is, which is emptier and quieter than any other. This is because Mr. Dacus hates noise and reprimands anyone for the slightest disturbance. Students have learned to keep their distance.

Except now.. I hear soft laughter. His door is open, and I am only a couple feet away when I finally see someone step out.

My breath catches in my chest and I almost come to a stop, entering a dreamlike state.

Not far from me is Darren Banks, the semblance of a Greek god himself. His spirited blue eyes meet mine, and I instantly feel blessed to hold his gaze a second time within the same hour.

Darren, notice me. It's me, I'm the one who wrote you that letter!

It must be fate. This has to be a major clue for him— running into me in this empty hallway!

My side curls bounce lightly on my shoulders as I get closer. My heart beats fast upon seeing his polite smile.

"Rain," he acknowledges me. My name drips like honey from his lips, dimples forming on either side of his cheeks as he walks beside me.

"Hey," I greet him back softly, afraid I'll squeal if I say his fine name right in front of him.

I sigh breathlessly when I hear him turn the corner, his footsteps fading out. I resist the urge to fan myself right then and there. This man is deadly. He doesn't even have to try. He could go a day without expensive brand name clothes and I would not notice.

His genuine, softhearted smile and relentless enthusiasm to learn is as powerful an attractor as anything else, if not more.

"Mr. Dacus," I stand confidently at the doorway. "I have my application ready."