𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐑𝐨𝐠𝐮𝐞'𝐬 | The Sequel

²⁰, rain and thunder

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐑𝐨𝐠𝐮𝐞'𝐬

chapter twenty; rain and thunder

"I couldn't care less about your feelings, so don't even try."

Jane Mary Black

FOR SOME REASON I CURRENTLY FIND MYSELF PLAYING WIZARD'S CHESS WITH EVAN. I don't know much about the black-haired boy, only that he is friends with Harrison and Teddy, cheated on one of his girlfriends and that he likes to party. Oh, and he is too good in wizard's chess. "Are you kidding me!" I call out. "Jane, keep it down," He huffs with eyes closed. I let out a soft chuckle feeling the same hangover. I don't remember much but I remember enough to know I'm mad at certain people. "You're bad at this." "Or you're cheating." "I would never." "Sure, but I am certainly bad at this." It's true, I don't even know all the rules to the game. "Last night was heavy." Evan states suddenly. "That is always the case when Teddy thinks of a game." His white teeth show when he laughs. "Yeah, well, his games give me headaches." I move a piece on the board before looking back up at the boy. "Well, at least it was fun." Until a certain point. "It was a good game, especially when you want to know things from people." "Yes, but that sucks at the same time." I shrug my shoulders. "The truth always comes up anyway." "Yup." He breathes.

I let my eyes move over the common room while Evan ponders his move. He's a nice guy, could potentially be a friend, I don't know. I guess we'll see. Then my eyes fall on Harrison who is striding our way. "Hey, mate." Evan greets his friend. "Jane, can we talk?" Harrison asks determinedly, neglecting his friend. "Sure," I reply slowly. "Great, bye Evan." And then he pulls me along. "See you next time, Evan!" I call out to the boy before turning onto the stairs. 

"I want to explain the situation." Harrison starts as we're in his empty dorm. "What situation? We're fine," I say. "We're not together, you're able to sleep with whoever you please. I don't care that you slept with Ella. It's totally fin–" "Yeah, right. That's enough. Just stop with the bullshit, Jane. You don't get it.." I watch him as he talks frustrated. "You don't even know half of it. Merlin, you don't even know how I feel about you. I–you're so–" 

Please don't say it. I think to myself. "I'm not in love with you, Harrison. I never have and I never will because it is only a distraction–because I knew you'd let me get away with it and look I was right!" I throw my hands up. "I mean it's also not like you're in love with me right? Because why would you have slept with her? Hmh? Please don't say it if you don't mean it." "I didn't–you don't get it–" he looks away for a second. "What you didn't sleep with her?" "No! If you would've stayed or just had given me one moment to explain I could have told you, but you never did, you're still not given me a moment to explain." I watch him talk. "I love you, Jane. And I hate myself for it, and you know damn well I do because teddy is my best friend and I go and do this and now I may have lost him. And I don't want to love you, I shouldn't, I know that." "You can't possibly love me, we hate each other, Harrison," I breathe. "I–I always have hated you." "Don't say that. You don't mean it." He whispers. "I do...I never loved you. You will never be more to me than a boy I slept with." I say it without thinking. He lets out a scoff and slowly nods. "You know what you are? A manipulative witch!" He hisses. "You just use me and you toss me away whenever you feel like it and I hate you for it. I hate you. I hate you!" This is the moment I'm supposed to walk away. It's better to walk away, right? "I'm sorry, Harrison. I thought we were on the same page with this." And then I leave.