"Carpe Diem... that's seize the day." DEAD POETS SOCIETY PREFERENCES/IMAGINES

"To wake up beside her..." :TODD ANDERSON REQUEST:

Author's Note: This is for @acid_esther  THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR REQUESTING! I loved this request idea btwww!!

Todd's POV:

I hate my childhood bed. Why? Because it's in my childhood room. I hate my childhood room. Why? Because I hate my home. Why? Because it's not a home, it's a prison and I am a victim to my so called parents being themselves. But her being here... my Esther, makes it... better. She laid with her hair out of her face, perfectly falling on her pillow. Well my pillow that she borrowed. But now that she laid there, and now that she cuddled into it, it would forever be hers because it would remind me of her. Anytime I would see it from now on, her beautiful face would soar through my memory, fresh and brand new like the summer air. Anytime I made my bed and put that pillow at the head of the bed, I'd think of the time she spent the night. The best night of my life. Last night, actually. 

I laid shirtless beside her, remembering the beautiful night we shared. We simply just spoke, talked, shared words. Talked about life, love, us. How happy we were together, how she finally made my house feel like a home, how she just simply... made me feel alive. Laying beside her I felt empowered. All I was doing was laying there! But she... she just... she was different. She was an angel that blessed my life. She was the sun that warmed my soul. She was the moon that cleared up my night sky of a life. She was the candle that gave off a beautiful scent for my attitude. She made me want to love and she gave me this certain desire to just be a better person. 

I never thought I was a good person, a smart one, an athletic one, a powerful one. My beautiful Esther just made me feel alive again. Or rather, alive for the first time in my life. She gave me a purpose. She sort of bullied me into writing stories, poetry, journal entries. But without that encouragement and second hand bullying... I never would've realized the power my writing held. I became the smart wise one in my family. The silent warrior. I wasn't just 'The Warrior' because I still had this angst and sadness against them. Mostly my parents. My brother didn't know what he was doing and I know he didn't mean to single me out. He tried to make me feel loved and included, but I've felt so unloved by my parents for so long that he can't just change that. My parents didn't know about my writing abilities but they didn't need to. My friends knew, Mr. Keating knew, and most of all my Esther knew. 

To wake up beside her is like the smell of an old book in a library. Amazing and something I loved discovering. Esther was like no other person I had ever met before. Every time I spoke to her, I discovered something knew about them. It was... I don't even know what it was.

To wake up beside her was like a warm blanket fresh out of the dryer touching you cold body. Satisfying and a feeling that you wished you could just replay over and over again.

To wake up beside her was like having a first kiss. Exciting and a moment you wish you could replay over and over and over again. Esther was just so exciting. 

I raised my hand and pushed a strand of hair behind her ear. I rubbed my hand down her arm and then gently traced circles on her shoulder. She rustled in her sleep so I froze, scared of waking her. I didn't want to wake her. Even if it was past nine in the morning, I wanted her to sleep. 

I didn't know someone could look so beautiful sleeping. I hoped I looked as good when I slept. I had a feeling I didn't. This sounds creepy... I'm not watching her sleep- I guess I am. She is my girlfriend. That's no excuse. I don't think I should-

BUT SHE IS JUST SO BEAUTIFUL! Her hair, her soft skin, her fluttering eye lashing, her everything. She just looked so peaceful. I wished I had that much inner peace. 

I still shouldn't be watching her and-

"Oh good morning, handsome." It was the voice of my beautiful Esther. She grabbed the hand that I had rested on her cheek, pulling it away from her and kissing my palm. She sighed sitting up a little bit, resting herself on her elbow, sitting like I was sitting. I felt bad. I must've waken her. I didn't even realize. 

"I'm sorry, darling. Did I wake you? I didn't mean to." I pushed myself up, sitting up in bed. She shook her head and sat up across from me, pulling my blankets up on her shoulders and holding herself. She rubbed her eyes, possibly hoping to take some of the tiredness she probably felt with her. 

"No, you didn't wake me. It's okay. How did you sleep?" Esther asked me. I smiled, wanting to tell her the truth. I slept perfectly, never better. Any night I sleep beside you, holding you in my arms, kissing you goodnight, I sleep perfectly. You make me feel so safe and loved. I know in your mind you're just my girlfriend and just a person, and I don't mean to scare you off, but it's true. No- Todd, you can't say that!

"For once, I slept good in my bed. Probably because you were here." Was all I said instead. She still smiled and blushed at my comment. That made me smile as well. She laid back down on her pillow, grabbing my hand. I laid back down, putting my arm around her and pulling her into my side. This is so perfect. I never wanted to leave whatever this is. 

"I slept well too. Thanks for letting me spend the night. Should we get up? It's getting late." Esther told me, sitting up and checking the clock. I shook my head and began to play with her hair again. She rested her head on my chest, putting her arms back around my waist. 

"No. It's only thirty past nine. And besides... I just want to stay here, with you." I told her. I rolled on my side to face her. She copied my actions. She put her hand on my cheek and began stroking my cheekbone with her thumb. Once again, this was perfect. Amazing. I never wanted to leave her. 

"I love you." She mumbled to me, kissing me as well. I put my forehead on hers, kissing her lips back, pulled her closer to me. How I love my Esther. 

"I love you too."

We then fell back asleep for one more hour. I never slept so late. Not even after staying awake till 2:00 a.m. due to Dead Poets Society meetings. I didn't mind sleeping late. I didn't mind because I slept in with Esther. I didn't mind doing anything with her, because of her. I would wake up late everyday for the rest of my life if it meant I got one more day to wake up beside her. 

To wake up beside her is like being blessed. Not like being blessed. To wake up beside her is getting blessed.