¬ 24th NCT member ( Yuta FanFiction ) ¬

¬ N I N E T E E N ¬

We have a live party for a New Year. It's been pretty hectic after we came home. Yuta still is kinda distant, its getting on my nerves honestly. Jaehyun is acting weirdly around me as well, which I didn't have time to talk to him about it.

"Guys, are you ready?"Manager asked, as he entered into common room."Yes, we are."Mark said excited about live. I just sat there, ready, waiting for call so we can go. Boys are all around and everyone is pretty much talking or pretty nervous that they shut down.

I saw Jaehyun on other side of couch, looking something on his phone. I think that is a chance. I sat down next to him, and he still hasn't moved his eyes from his phone. "Jay?" I said, looking at him. "Alex?" he said, putting down his phone.

"Is everything okay?" I asked, now looking at my hands. "Yes, everything is fine."he said, as I can feel the look on me."You seem distant, and if I said something.."i began, but his hand that he put on mine, stopped me.

"You've didn't do anything. I've just had some bad days, but I'm not mad at you. It's been pretty hectic these past day, probably why."he said, as I looked up at him, he give me a small smile.

I smiled at him, and he opened his arms, I hugged him. We sat there like that, then Yuta came in room, he looked at us and his expression changed. I'm not sure if I actually said how much it hurts, for him to be like this.

We pulled away from hug, but Jaehyun put his arm over my shoulder, still not letting me go. Honestly, I missed this. Among all of them, I was closest to him, when it comes to talk about my feelings and stupid things in late night talks, besides Yuta.

~01.01.2021. (3am)~

We finished with live, and we are all exhausted. It's hectic in changing room, so I decided to go on roof top. I took my coat and took a elevator to a last floor. I climbed tight stair and pushed heavy door of rooftop. I got out and stopped after spotting him, standing there.

I decided to go there as well. I looked down on Seoul, it looks beautiful with all these lights on and stars above. I took a cigarette out and lighted it up. I looked at him, he was thinking while looking at stars. The lights of city are making his eyes sparkle even in dark.

My heart is heavy just by thinking that he pushed me away. It hurts me, and I'm not even sure why he is mad about me. Those photos mean nothing, and he still didn't give me a chance to explain.

Image of him become blurry from tears that are gathering at the bottom of my eyes. I can feel some of them, went down, so I whipped it off. I looked in front of me, as both of us aren't talking.

I turned off the cigarette and I was about to go inside, but I couldn't keep my mouth shut. "Yuta, what's wrong? I don't want you to push me away."i said lightly, looking at his back."Nothing is wrong."he said, coldly.

"Something is! God, what do you want me to do? What did I do?" I asked him, almost like yelling, trying so hard not to cry. "It's not about you, stop thinking that planet is spinning around you."he said that, which broke my heart even more.

He regret it right when he said it, he began walking to me, but I put my hand in air, stopping him."Yeah, it's right. Sorry for asking you,I won't ever, ever again, ask."i said, turning around and I was about to go inside but his hand stopped me.

"I'm sorry for saying that. I'm not right in my mind right now."he said, apologetically, not taking his hand from my arm, but I didn't turn back to face him."You act like I don't exist. You talk and joke around the boys, but you barely look at me. I just want to know.."i said, lightly, as tear rolled down my cheek.

"It's complicated. I just..I can't tell you."he said, and I turned around to face him now."Sure, when you are ready, you know where to find me."i said coldly while pushing off his hand from my arm.

As I was about to open those heavy door, tears running down my cheek, he stopped me."Wait."he said, as I stopped,sighing loudly. He pulled me, and I ended in his arms. My heart began beating so fast, with our closeness.

He pushed a small pieces of hair that are on my face, while looking me in the eyes. His eyes are warm again, and he seems more relaxed in my arms. He pressed his lips onto mine, and I froze. After he did that, he pulled away.

"I'm so sorry, I didn't.." he began, but I run up to him, and kissed him again. He pulled me closer to him, while holding my waist, while my fingers are going through his hair. After couple of seconds, we moved away trying to catch a breath.

He give me a most beautiful smile ever, while still holding me close. I put my head on his chest, listening to his fast heartbeat, while he placed his chin on my head. We stood there in silence, still holding each other in hands.

"I'm sorry for being jerk to you. I was jealous, and confused. I never meant to hurt you."he said, as he is making circles on my back, with his fingers."Yeah, you really were."i said, teasingly." I'll make it up to you. I swear."he said, so I looked up at him, I cutely nodded and give him a smile.

"Let's go."he said, poking my nose, and then giving me a quick pack, before we left the rooftop, him holding me around my waist. Honestly, I'm so happy. It feels so right.

We got down there and everyone was ready, expect of us two. We got a couple of looks, but nothing serious. "I'll change and come back."Yuta said, and went to dressing room, while I joined the crowd.

"Did something happen between you two?"Johnny whispered to me, while smirking at me."We cleared things up."i said, giving him a smile."Why are you sparkling then?" he said, still smirking.

"Probably the lights."i said, not looking at him, as he just laughed. After Yuta changed, we got into car, along with Taeil, Doyoung and Jungwoo. I drow them to the apartment, and now we are heading in.