Gemini sisters

chapter 15

Damon POV

All I can think about right now is wanting to be with my little mate. I can't wait for this meeting to be over. We've all had a few rough months now. With Samiel being quiet I've been trying to keep the pack training and frequent runs to keep the place safe. It has made things harder for Sid and Tara to train with Shima, but their fighting abilities have gotten better. Sid is a beast with training. Wade was right to train her growing up. He knew something would happen later for her to need it. She taught Tara some self-defense but nothing for attacking. I think she thought she would always be there to protect her. I know she blames herself for what happened to Tar.

"I know things look bad right now. Alpha Shadow hasn't declared anything at the moment. I know a lot is messed up right now but Xedna and I will fix this." I say looking around the table at everyone's faces. I can see the disappointment in everyone. They think I've failed them and in some ways I have. Vincent says Alpha Shadow hasn't been home much He'll go out all day and is home at night. I've tried getting a hold of Shadow for the last 2 weeks now not only does Sid have to train with both the pack and Shima and does pack runs with us now and learns her duties as a luna she's overloaded. I can see the stress getting to her. She's stepped up a lot my little wolf, Tara is all healed up but mentally she's an empty shell. Victor is with her most days unless Sid beats him to her first. Most nights she sleeps in the chair in Tara's room because of her night terrors. Some nights Victor switches off with her but not by choice but because I'll take her to the room when she sleeps, and Victor takes over. Sid of course always scolds me for doing this, but I take it anyway.

"What are you going to do about Xedna?"

"What she did was out of line. Who is teaching her the rules and duties? If she is to be our luna she can't cause problems that are going to hurt us or worse, you!" Letty bursts from one side of the table. I look to her and around the table to see that most of the members are agreeing with her. Thinking of what to say my senses pick up Xedna's scent and I look up as she knocks on the door and slowly opens it peeking her head through. 

"Speak of the devil!" Eric chimes off. I stare daggers at him to which he just rolls his eyes at me. 

" I need to say something to you all," she says this as she gives everyone eye contact but me. 

" You can come in. Come sit here." I say as I pull out the empty chair next to me. I watch her as she hesitates to look around the table for a moment. Sighs and sits in the chair I pulled out for her. Xedna sits pulling herself to the table sighs as she sits up straight and places her hands folded on the table looking at her fingers slightly fidgeting and looking around the room.

" I know I haven't been the best example or leader since I was brought here. I.. am learning as I go, and this isn't an easy thing to learn. I have had to look out for only 2 people in my life and that's myself and Xantara. Going from two people to an entire pack and learning you have a whole other side to yourself, while also trying to be in a relationship. Especially when you've never been in one is nerve recking and earth-shattering at the same time. I'm not someone who needs to be controlled nor am I stupid or naive about what most of you think about me. " She says this as she gives each pack member eye contact including me. " I am trying to get it right. I'm trying to learn everything so I can be everything I need to be for this pack, to be where I'm needed all while trying to keep my sanity because I haven't had a moment to process everything that has changed so quickly and not by choice. It is taking me longer to come to terms with all of this than I thought it would. So I guess what I'm saying, actually what I'm asking for is some patients and to work with me rather than judge me and condemn me for being a bad person when I have no clue what it means to be one in the first place. Please." Xedna ends her speech and looks at everyone one last time her head falls down to her hands as she sighs and still keeps her composure. My little mate is just lost that's all.