I guess we mutually decided to skip class. About and hour later he had finally stopped crying, but I didn't stop holding him. A small part of me was still mad at him, but it was hard to be. He promised he would start going to a support group and actually trying.
Somehow though, even when me and him were watching batman movies, I still felt guilty about leaving Luke in the back of my mind. The difference between Luke and Calum is so drastic. Luke is like an angel, a virgin who only wants the best for me. Calum though is like the night, deep and mysterious and everything my mom warned me about. There was no doubt in my mind who I wanted and I was an idiot for it. I wanted Calum, he was so messed up, but he still was trying so hard to fix himself. I wish Luke wasn't so alone though. I guess there's nothing I can do about it.
"What's wrong ?" Asked Calum.
"Nothing." I said giving him a reassuring smile.
"You're so warm." He said cuddling closer to me. I giggled wrapping one of his arms around me.
He leaned down and kissed my nose.
"I like you so much." He whispered.
"I like you so much too." I replied.
"No, you don't understand. I like you so much I'm going to go to a support group and get some help, Sadie."
I knew that it's not a good idea, but I swear when he sat there smiling at me I couldn't help myself. I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him. He instantly tilted his head seeping the kiss. Before long my shirt was on the ground and so were his pants.
"No." He said, sounding pained. I took my hands off my pants, which I was hurrying to remove.
I sucked in a breath at my rejection.
"It's not that I don't want you. Because oh my gosh I do so bad, but I want to wait a while."
"I'm so sorry. I didn't even think about if it might be hard for you to stop."
He chuckled. "It was hard to stop, but I would do anything for you, love."
I gave him one more sweet kiss. We decided to cuddle up in a blanket. We talked about our dreams.
Calum has always wanted to do music, he wants to be the bassist in a punk band, but until he can get his band together he's studying marine biology here. So he's smart and plays music. Wow.
I told Calum about how when I was younger me and my friend Grace had always wanted to live in L.A. , and being roommates here was accomplishing my first dream. Then I told him about my need to help people and how I was studying to be a phycologist.
We talked for at least and hour about how we knew there couldn't just be humanity, how we believe in the unknown.
At the end of the day he intertwined our fingers and whispered in my ear.
"I love your hair."
"I love your eyes."
"I love how you're truthful."
"I love your smile."
He placed a sweet kiss on my neck with each compliment. I couldn't stop smiling.
"I want you to be mine."
"I'm yours." I said.
"No, I mean like my girlfriend."
"I'm yours." I whispered carefully as I laid in his arms. It was a rash decision, but I knew I couldn't let him slip away.
