An Angel got me Suffocating ~Kellic~

Chapter 2

Kellin's POV

I sighed as I stared at myself in the mirror of the bathroom. As per usual, I hated what I saw, I never liked my own reflection, but this time was worst then usual. And no, it wasn't because of the zombie make up either. All I could see was a loser, a shy, awkward, fucked up loser that not even his own parents could love. If my own parents couldn't love me, when they're love was supposed to be unconditional then who could? I was a loser will long shaggy messed up black hair, big blue dull eyes, pasty white ghost like skin marked by a handful of small tattoo's I'd gotten on a whim because I liked the pain and feel and although I wasn't fat, I didn't have an attractive body either. I was boring, basic, dull and a A rank loser with too many issues bursting out the seems. Not to mention for a guy, my voice was slightly feminine and I looked that way too. A man like Vic, a beautiful, tanned, long brown haired man with the body of a god could never like a loser like me. Even on the slight off chance he did find me attractive, which he didn't, he wouldn't like me. I was a socially awkward geek who loved his anime and comic books with too many scars on his arms and legs as well as the scars on my heart and soul. I never stood a chance, I would never stand a chance, it was hopeless.

I sighed once more, wishing I could be someone else before washing my hands, plastering on my usual brave face and exiting the bathroom.
'So many people' I cringed as I battled through crowds of people. Sometime between entering the house, going outside and coming back in more people arrived. It made me uneasy, small crowds I could deal with, but this was too much as I was being knocked and shoved between people.
It made it worse being in a house I'd never been in before, and I'd seemingly managed to loose all sense of direction in the throng of people surrounding me. My breathing became short and unsteady, a panic attack was slowly rising, my surroundings started spinning, the noises became quite and muffled. I needed to find my friends but I couldn't even find my way out if this part of the house. I had no choice but to hope that one of the rooms around me where empty so I could stay in there until I calmed.

"Woah! Easy there!" A sweet voice chuckled as two hands caught me after tripping over someone in the hallway. "Kellin? You okay?" I think it was Vic, but mid panic attack in a dark hallway, I couldn't quite tell. All I could do was shake my head in response, words wouldn't come out of me. "It's alright, come here." A hand took mine, leading me into a near by room and set me down on the edge of the bed before closing the door. "Kellin, breath with me okay? Focus on my breathing. In through the nose, out through the mouth okay? In...and out...in...and out..."
I tried to focus on the person in front of me breathing, trying to copy them. Slowly, but surely, my surroundings became clearer, my breathing evened out, noise became normal and the room stopped spinning. My eyes focused to find Vic knelt down in front of me, smiling at me. Great, now I for sure had no chance with him.
"S-Sorry." I choked.
"What you sorry for?" He chuckled. "Panic attacks happen, don't need to be sorry about it, I'm just glad I found you. Are you okay now?"
I couldn't look at him, I could only bring my knees up to my chest, cuddling them and burying my head, feeling ashamed.
"I'm fine." I mumbled.
"And I'm Jack the Ripper." He sighed. I felt the space next to me shift as Vic sat down. "Want to talk about it?" I shook my head, I struggled to talk things through with Lydia and Maude, let alone an almost perfect stranger I had a slight crush on. He was the last person who I needed to realize just how messed up I was. "Wanna stay in here?" I nodded. "Want me to stay?"
"N-no it's okay, g-go back to y-your friends." I held back tears that threatened to spill over.
"I'd rather stay here until I know you're okay..."
"I-I'll be fine."
"And you're silly if you think I'm going to believe that for a second." Suddenly I felt an arm around my shoulders, Vic pulling me into his side. "I'm staying and no...you don't get a choice in the matter. I'll text Mike to let your friends know that you're with me so they don't worry."
"T-thank you." Why was he being so nice to me? The only people who had ever cared for me where Lydia, Maude and my grandparents. Anyone else always just left me, or stood there and watched while I felt like I was drowning. What made him so different?