Photograph

Twenty

BILLIE'S POV

It was until I heard the door slam shut downstairs and was ripped from reality that I noticed Alex was gone.

Like, not just from tour, but from my life. Literally.

Something I'd noticed, was that Katie was gone, too.

I'd heard them exchange numbers on the bus, so maybe they were hanging out.

Not like I fucking care or anything.

I just hoped Katie wouldn't cock-block me.

"I was thinking that song we were doing a couple months ago on the ukulele. I forgot the words, but I remember the chords."

The noise of ukulele strings being plucked had seeped their way into my red room, followed by Finneas, who was twisting the small ends to tune the instrument. I was dazed off, staring at my boot that was on my foot.

"The album isn't rushed this time. You're not expected to sound a certain way— so we can just fuck about with different samples and see how you sound with them, and if it doesn't work, we can dig out some old unreleased songs and re-record them."

The soft hum of the uke stopped. "Billie?"

My head snapped up to face my brother who was still toying with the strings, a firm look playing up on his face.

"Alright, what is going on between you and Alex?"

He set the uke down on a small stand beside my bed and sat on the end of the mattress, looking at me.

I sighed. "Ion know. Guess we just... Drifted? What were you saying about the ukulele?"

He snorted.

"You said you liked her. What happened?"

"Finn, just drop it."

"Not until you tell me why she completely turned off yesterday."

"It's nothing."

"Not from where I'm standing, Bil."

"FINE. You wanna know what happened? I said she was weird because she liked girls. K? She freaked out on me and she hasn't spoken properly since and I need to talk to her to explain to her that I really fucking like her a lot and that it slipped out because fucking stupid Rob told me to drop whatever the fuck was happening between us or she gets fired but she won't even let me justify myself and we aren't even goddamn touring anyway! Happy, now?"

He was silent.

Rob had called me while I was in the green room, getting ready for the show that ruined all this, that he knew exactly what the fuck was happening between me and Alex. He told me to cut it off or she gets cut off. I couldn't risk it.

Also, I had no idea why he was so against it, I guess he was so pressed because she was just taking fucking photos or whatever and we weren't allowed to get close.

That's why he was all touchy fucking feely when he saw me again the next day, with Alex on me. What a bozo.

Finneas watched as a sob escaped my lips, and he pulled me into a hug, carefully trying not to knock my dead foot.

"I'll talk to her. I'll invite her over. We can have a calm chat about all this stuff, okay? She probably knows you didn't mean it."

"Because that's why she fucking blanked me, right?"

"She's still in fucking shock Billie. You gotta remember she's a human being with real life problems too."

I sniffled. "Fine. Whatever. Fine. Play that stupid song now, I know you're dying to show me."