I got bored with the first one, so I decided to make a second one! Here, I talk about my stupid life, I show crappy art, I occasionally review stuff, and I shove one-shots in here every now and then. So enjoy this I guess? I'll find a better cover l...
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
All of this is based on the patapon types that I have or I at least know about. I just got into the first game a few weeks ago since I "bought" a PSP, and I don't really know what I'm doing but I seem to be making these war eyeballs happy.
So first we gotta explain the f tier.
A lot of people in this hopefully cursed free community like Rah's mini game the most, and I like it a lot too. The mini game would be on the godly s tier if Rah wasn't such a fRaUd.
He never states that he's a chef, and all he does is the chopping and the teetering and the stuff, and then he gets some stew so he can feed his troops. Nothing wrong with that, but not once did he give the TRUE star credit, which is the pot. I think his name is Slurpy. He's probably in the second game, or maybe he's in the first, I'll find out for myself later.
Also patapons apparently have carrots and other vegetables and stuff, why do they need so much Kacheek.
But yeah F is for fraud.
For D tier, we have the Kibapon. On fever streaks, they're really good at riding horses and killing folks, and they have good defense, but they're worthless as hell otherwise and they die very easily. I was gonna put this one on C tier but then the app glitched and it moved. I still don't like these guys very much so far though, maybe that'll change.
We got the Yaripons in C tier. They're okay, I liked them a lot when they just randomly decided to come along for the adventure in the beginning of the game, they were twirling sticks around and spinning. They're the real ones, I guess they're loyal or something? Honestly all of them are since you're some kind of God in the game, but you'll probably be around Yaripons the longest. They're fine in game too, not so much prior fever since they can't jump at all, but they're really great during fever since they suddenly have the energy to jump. Sleepy Yaripon promo art exists too.
I was gonna put Hatapon on C tier as well, he's the one who carries the flag in every mission and he's the first Patapon you meet. He's kinda like the lifeline, if Hatapon dies, you fail the mission. He moves when the other Patapons move, and when they fight, he just stands in the back and does absolutely nothing but watch, saying that fighting is a piece of cake. If it wasn't for the fact that he's a necessity to pass missions, he'd be on f tier.
But I guess his life is kinda sad since he has to constantly watch his friends die.
He doesn't bitch at you when you make a mistake either, that's nice.
Fah goes to B tier, all I know about him is that he's a farmer boi
Yumipons belong on A tier, they're probably the smartest ones of the bunch and can actually see a big ass dragon inches away from them. If you get enough of them, they'll inflict tons of damage on enemies in fever streaks, I think they shoot three or so at a time then.
Tatapons (1 and 2, they're not too different I think) are good too, they take enemies down quick when you have five or six of them together. It just sucks that they automatically advance to the front, so they die first if you don't do the chaka thing, or I think that's what you have to do. They also make it hard to hunt for some reason.
And now we have the best war children.
For the mask guy, all I know is that he/she looks very cool, and I can't wait to get around to Patapon 3.
Of course Meden has to be up there as well, she loves papayas and she's very nice. I felt bad for her when she said she didn't want to fight the bad guys, that's some character development.
I know I might've skipped out on other, better Patapons, like the ones that blow the murder trumpets, the thicc ones, or the froggy and bunny ones, and all of those should be on this tier too but like...
Pan clearly deserves the number one spot.
He's nice too, he thanks you for bringing back to life and always humbly asks for a moment of your time. He dances too, pretty well, and he just stands by Ubo Bon the tree and vibes for a few hours, not to mention that he has the cleanest looking hat, beta design was even cleaner. He's underrated.
Kay yeah that's my list, opinions could change the further I get. I'm not really finished with the first game so that'll take all summer at most.
Also school was shut down again because the football team was getting sick. If I don't have it, that's great, if I do, oh no.
