Hold My Hand (Shigaraki x Female Reader)

17 - Beginnings (Book 2)

Y/N POV

I wake up again, it feels like I wake up and fall asleep again continuously, forever and always, the same drab, dismal lifestyle, and I have no clue why. Different people leave and enter, question and interrogate, shout or be kind. What have I done to deserve this? If only I could remember the full story. Memories have come back to me bit by bit, and some of the information I overheard from the scientists have been proven useful.

I know this much; I left my home, my boyfriend abused me to near death, then I was saved by someone, apparently the leader of the infamous crime group, The League of Villains, by the name of Tomura Shigaraki? My memories become a little fazy now, until we get to a certain event, apparently I joined this league and became a wanted criminal for many illegal acts, some of them are acts of destruction, and one that I could never believe to be true, murder. How could I murder someone, I would never wish anyone's life away, even my abusive ex-boyfriend. I cried when they told me what I did, how couldn't you? Stealing away someone's chance of happiness, chance of redemption. How heartless was I? How much rage consumed me?

They made me believe it was Shigaraki's doing, that he forced me to 'owe' him, and to cause destruction, scientists told me after they 'saved' me, they kidnapped me, tied me up for weeks before letting me go out with them and learn their ways, by death threats. A part of me believes what they did, kidnapping, starvation, that sounds villainous to me and I wouldn't be lying if I thought that was villainous, but a part of me twinges in pain when I think of Shigaraki using me for murder, I'm not weak willed like that. I don't remember communicating with any of the villains. no names, conversations, trust, friendship.. only peculiar distorted faces that warp my dreams.

One thing I know for definite, I can't trust everything these scientists, heroes and investigators say, because I know one thing for certain that they have twisted to suit them, my views on the hero society.

When I was younger, I used to love the hero society, treasured it, I looked up to the pro heroes, they protected us from the people who wanted to kill me. One day, all that changed, our house was attacked, no, our whole street was attacked, all in flames, destruction. Everyone knows that day as All Might's debut. But as a young child, I believed All Might didn't want to save anyone, only the ones worth saving. Else why would he let my parents die, but keep me alive? Let them be crushed by the rubble, covering me in shelter, why didn't he save them? As time went by, I realized that it wasn't his fault, yet he wasn't my savior, that was when I decided to ignore the hero/villain society as much as possible, I had no views on wrong and right, they would be twisted and nonfactual after all.

They said I loved the hero society, and wanted to become a pro, but I didn't believe my quirk was good enough. Those scheming liars, maybe, maybe they were the bad guys? And Shigaraki?Was Shigaraki the good one?

Shigaraki POV

How could this happen, All Might, here? He left, luckily we got the kid out of there before he grabbed him, but I'm worried, for the first time in a long time, worried for Master. He's out there, he's going to fight All Might, Master isn't ready, he's took weak. I want to fight All Might instead of him, but I'm not strong enough, we'll lose. I brush back my hair and stare at the battle, hiding away from the sidelines, I look intently, maybe I can learn something, and maybe Master will win, I've seen the powers he's contained.

Time goes by, my heart races, Master might win, I scratch my neck in nerves and anxiety, All Might looks so weak right now, he looks almost dead, skin pale, yet he still fights, his stupid neon eyes and disgusting smile still there, he still wants to make people feel 'safe' and 'protected', he uses violence, just like me. I'm lying though, through my teeth, I don't believe that, I don't care, I like the violence, society discarded me, so I'll discard them.

Then it happens, the kids, the plain boy again, what is his power, what kind of skill is this, it's almost like All Might's power. There's another boy, shooting ice across the stands, it's reasonably impressive, if only all of these kids weren't so intent on being a hero, we'd be unstoppable. I begin to zone out, this fight is uninteresting to me, I would normally care, yet, All Might is too weak, and I waned to be the one to kill him, with y/n at my side.

Great.

I brought my thoughts back to y/n, can't I go twenty four hours without thinking about her? This could be the downfall of All Might! Why aren't I excited? I will be all powerful, be able to control, to show them what they have done to me? I'm violent, menacing, and evil. I want to kill and show what I can do to people who left me to die, yet why is y/n still in my mind. I'm in-denial, after this immense battle, no matter what the outcome, I want to find y/n, without her, I have no true motivation.