Lost My Way🔞《 kth~jjk × Y/n 》

31) ill

You had a restless sleep. You woke up early in the morning, tired and feeble. After staggering to take a bath, you put on the pajama and quietly went back to lie on the bed again. You were cold but the quilt with taehyung inside was warm like a comfortable stove.

For the northern part of south korea, the sunrise in winter was normally very late. Taehyung, who was obviously exhausted recently, was still in a sound sleep. Biting the lower lip, you carefully moved closer to softly hug your man’s waist. Your love for Taehyung was so deep that the fear and affection for taehyung had merged into your blood and soul. Even though you had accepted hemodialysis several times, your love for taehyung were never filtered out; it was just there, in each cell, and had become an unspeakable instinct since long time ago.

There would be no such person as you who would accompany taehyung for seven harsh years, endure three years of long wait as taehyung was having affairs outside and spend the last year of your life to love taehyung . It was only you , who could always be so tender and brave. Only you .

Taehyung woke up to find you still sleeping in his arms. Taehyung tightened his grasp over you in the half-awake state. Due to the subconscious love for you, no one was allowed by taehyung to stay in his bed for the whole night, except you.

You physique didn’t change a lot over these years, as you slept in taehyung’s arms now as a cute cat as if they were back in high school. Taehyung just couldn’t remember when you stopped to cling to him, when you stopped to ask for his whereabouts when he stayed out all night, and when you stopped to look into his dubious friends. You were always alone, just becoming more and more taciturn and cheerless. Even taehyung thought he was bored with you for quite a long time and didn’t want to stay with you, but until today taehyung suddenly realized that he was simply too afraid to face you. Taehyung was afraid to confront your tender but vacant look, evasive eyes, and subconscious resistance in bed.

Taehyung reached out his hand to tuck your messy hair behind the ear, while looking at you with soft and deep look. You were still sleeping with regular breathing, and your breath made taehyung’s heart itch. In the end, taehyung couldn’t help but touch your flushed face. Taehyung was in a daze when he found that you were having a fever.

“y/n? Be a good girl, get up,” taehyung said with raised eyebrows, and slightly pinched the tip of your nose.

You were used to a low fever, so you didn’t have any obvious feeling of discomfort. Instead you were suffering from the headache after being woken up by taehyung. So you gently shook your head and snuffled in a soft way to show your rejection.

Taehyung enjoyed your “spoiled” manner like a willful child, so he just tucked you in and got out of bed to search for medicine.

Surprisingly, the bookcase, though not big originally, was now half empty and the other half was filled with different sizes of glass bottles with medicine inside. They were supposed to be medicine, however, they didn’t look like to be. If they were really medicine, then it was weird to have so much over here. Taehyung didn’t take it seriously; he found the medicine for fever from the medical box and hurried to your side.

“Take some medicine first, and then continue sleeping,” taehyung brought a cup of water to your lips, “I will cook millet congee for you later.”

You slowly came to sense, and moved over to take the medicine.

Taehyung asked, “Did I hurt you in bed last night?”

You wrapped the quilt around yourself, turned your back to taehyung, and didn’t answer him.

“I have time today; let me take you to hospital after breakfast. Have you been treating yourself harshly, baby? You are so thin!” Moving his hand gently over your hair, taehyung was a little astonished to find you so skinny.

You stiffened and sullenly replied, “I don’t want to go to hospital.” Pausing for a few seconds, you added, “Go to feed my cats, please.”

“Don’t be like this. Listen to me,” taehyung would never compromise on what he had determined to do, but he realized he was too tough on words when speaking with you, so taehyung also added, “I will go to feed the cats, so don’t worry about that.”

Seeing tae walk out of the room, you still didn’t want to go to hospital. Both of your relationship was doomed to end, and it was too late to make up for what had been missed. You would never accept apology or guilt, if they were based on sympathy.

Taehyung , where were you in the very first place? The look in your eyes was sad, as you recalled that just two months ago, taehyung neither agreed to come home to eat dumplings with you, nor asked about why your face was so pale. Otherwise,you wouldn’t have kept your secret so long on your own. It took more than love for one to withstand all neglect and hurt, and to devote one’s affection and even life to the other, in disregard of death.

You face got paler, you could pretend to be tough, or display your weakness to resist the things you didn’t want to do.

After taehyung made breakfast and went back to bedroom to call you for the breakfast, taehyung found that you curled up in bed, and your little face was pale and covered with cold sweat. You noticed taehyung, and you lifted your head with eyes filled with tears. You wanted to speak but only opened your mouth, and murmured, “Tae…”

“I am aching…”

“Which part is aching? Tell me. Y/n, don’t frighten me…”

“I am feeble, and my waist and legs are so aching.”

Taehyung held you into his arms with the quilt wrapped around his body. Taehyung only supposed that the sex last night made you tired, and you happened to have a fever, so he felt so uncomfortable. Taehyung softly comforted, “You need to have a good rest; let’s take congee later. I will accompany you to have a physical examination some other day.”

You nodded, knowing that you had kept your secret one more time.