A Perfect World

Chapter 33

AELIN POV

Aelin felt him coming before he landed.

"Go on ahead," she told Asterin, "I'll catch up."

Asterin paused, eyes narrowing in confusion that was quickly cleared as she followed Aelin's gaze towards the sky.

"Don't be too far behind," she muttered before sprinting off.

Not a moment later, Rowan was swooping down, shifting as he landed deftly on his feet before her. She couldn't help but recall the first time they had met. It had been exactly like this. So much had changed since then. She felt so stupid. He was an immortal Fae warrior with a beautiful bitch of a fiancée and she... she was just an infatuated child. Her face burned with shame at the thought.

"I'm sorry," were the first words out of his mouth.

She had no idea what she had expected him to say, but she quickly found herself beyond caring... Or at least forcing herself not to. Whatever pride she had left, she was intent on salvaging it. If only to cover up her embarrassment.

"Whatever for, Your Highness?" She couldn't keep the bitter bite out of her words. She hated herself for it. She hated that he affected her so much. He always had, since that damn moment he, quite literally, swooped into her life.

"I am not marrying Remelle."

What? she thought. Though the words that actually came out of her mouth were, "I don't care." A small part of her brain registered that he probably suspected how she felt about him, but it was a thought she refused to face.

He reacted as if she slapped him in the face. She attempted to step around him, but blocked her path. "Where are you going?" he demanded.

"That's none of your business."

"Aelin, you can't be out in the woods in the middle of the night and not say where you're going. It's not safe."

"Actually, I can do whatever I want. And I can very well take care of myself too."

"Look, I know you're upset and I know how this looks—"

"Upset? Upset doesn't even begin to cover it, Rowan. My life has been spinning completely out of control for this past few weeks and the only useful information I've come to understand is that I never had any control over my life, ever. Not since the damn day I was born. My parents think I'm dead, my cousin is a sociopath hell-bent on taking over my Kingdom and my other cousin is in custody of the former. Look, I have a lot going on and I don't need this in my life right now."

"What does that mean?"

"Move!" she seethed, stepping closer towards him.

He didn't back down. He only stepped closer. "What does that mean?" he asked again.

"I don't need one more thing I don't understand."

That was the frustrating truth of it all. Of all the things she didn't understand, this thing between them was the most disconcerting. Sometimes she would think it was all in her head, but then he would look at her like he was was looking at her right now, in that way that made it hard for her to breathe, and she'd think otherwise.

"Ask me anything and I'll tell you everything," he said.

"I don't think you have the answers I need."

"I might have some," he offered.

It was a tempting offer, too. But the longer she stayed her with him, the less control she would have over her emotions. That was the last thing she needed tonight. Aelin suddenly realized how tired she was. Earlier tonight, she had been completely devastated. A chaotic mixture of disappointment of anger was still churning within when Asterin had found her and lit her fuse up once again. She was tired of feeling, tired of thinking. Though she was still learning about her magic, she was pretty sure that was a dangerous state of being for someone who was about to unleash a hell of a lot of it.