Taken. (karlnap)

Is this real?

Tw for most chapters from now on:
Ptsd, panic attacks, anxiety attacks, hallucinations, derealisation, talks of kidnapping.

(Karls pov)

I've been out the hospital for a few days now. Police keep coming by asking me questions about.......it.
I cant answer them, everytime I try I cant think straight. My mind goes back to those horrid days and I can't handle it.

Sapnap doesn't let them come by anymore since I had a panic attack last time, im living with him now. his parents are very sweet people and understand I need Sapnap and that I need a safe place to stay.

They don't really bother me because they know I need space so im thankful for that. Right now Sapnaps down stairs, I believe ordering food.
He left me with his pc on talking to some friends on discord so I wasn't fully alone.

"George what the hell man, your literally dog water" I heard quackity shout through his mic. I smiled knowing he probably lost to George or something. It's nice that no one treats me very different, if they did id probably feel worse then I do.

"Karl" I froze, that voice. I feel the hair's on my back rise like a frightened animals. Not now please I haven't thought about them since then, they aren't back right?.

I look behind me to see a tall figure resembling the person that made me this way, i was drowned in fear and stress. "Your not real" I shout, I close my eyes trying to make the figure disappear.

They start coming closer, I feel my chest Starting to burn to the point im gasping for air. Their not real. Their not real. Their not real. They can't be real. This isn't real. Im not real.

What's real? Why can't I feel anything anymore, I don't feel like im in my body anymore. It's so dark, whats happening. All I see is him.
He won't leave, hes just standing there staring, I cant move.

I cant breathe, I cant move, I don't know what's reality anymore. "SOMEONE PLEASE HELP ME" I screamed with all the air I had left. I cant breathe my throats on fire, no ones around me but the person who caused me pain.

I cant hear muffled shouts, I cant tell where there coming from or who they belong to. They just get mixed with my thoughts screaming and my cries. I feel like im back, back in that room I was in only a few weeks ago.

Everything feel the same like I never left that place, like I never got saved. I never got out I've always been here no one saved me. No one cared. I'm not free im still trapped.

It wasn't real, I wasn't with my friends i never was. Im still stuck here alone in the dark, bleeding and crying. No ones coming, why would they? Im a burden nothing more Everything worse.

I keep screaming but nothing seems to change im still here, there's no way this isn't reality right? I'm still stuck? I'm still alone? I still hadn't seen sapnap have I? My friends are still looking for me?

Im still in the dark, ready for my next torture session. Waiting for the next time im stuck screaming and crying in pain. I dont want this to be reality, take me back. take me back. TAKE ME BACK. "TAKE ME BACK PLEASE " I screamed while Everything shattered around me.

Everything was fading away into the room I was in moments before. This time sapnap was holding on to me for dear life, he was repeating the same sentence over and over again.

"Im here and your real, im real and this is reality not there." He says in a calm voice repeating in my ear with a soft tone that made feel calmer. I looked around the room still frantic about where I was before.

Im back in sapnaps room, im safe nothing happened. I grabbed on to his back grasping the cloth. I feel tears streaming down my face, I feel his grip lighten up with my movement.

"Im here, this is real" he says again reassuring me im in reality and its not fake. "I'm sorry, im sorry, im sorry" I say over and over again. He keeps his grip on me and pulls me back so we're facing each other.

"Theres no reason to be sorry, you did nothing wrong. All you need to know is that I'm here and will be and when you wanna talk about this im always right here besides you" he smiled, still calm and caring.

"Do you want food?" He asked, placing his hand on my face, really reassuring me this is real and not some fake delusion. I shake my head no, not feeling like words can be said. "Do you want to cuddle and watch some cartoons then?" He asked. I nodded.

He lifted me up and went to his bed, he layed me down and layed next to me. He snuggled me into a secure hold. It was safe and warm. He played some cartoons that were on.
He kept me close and warm, I could feel his slight tremble but I was pretty shaky too so it might just be me.

I heard my phone buzz, I picked it up and checked who it was. It was quackity and George. They both texted me about if I was ok because they heard me from discord. Before I could do anything sapnap took my phone and placed it on the nightstand behind him.

"You don't need to answer that now, let's just calm down first them you can answer if your ready" he reassures me, it's like he knew I was uncomfortable with answering it at this point in time. I just smiled to myself knowing he knew how to help me.

We continued watching cartoons for hours, I was to scared to fall asleep before but now I feel safe. So I rested my eyes feeling better then before.
"I love you jacobs" his voice plays in a soft tone. "I love you too sap".