basorexia
(n) an overwhelming urge to kiss
"I can't be who she needs me to be, Alex. I'm trying to be a resident and a wife and I'm trying to keep it all together, but I can't."
"You can do this, I know you can. Your Dad would be so proud of how fa...
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"Dude, what the fuck?" Charlie says as she meets Meredith, Cristina and Darcy at the ER entrance.
"She got bottled," Cristina explains as Darcy sits on a bed, her face is covered in blood.
"I can see that," Charlie says as she inspects the wound on Darcy's cheek. "What happened?"
"There was a fight, I stopped it."
"With your face?" Charlie laughs and Darcy winces as she disinfects the wound, wiping away the blood.
"Don't tell Alex."
"Oh? So you are fucking Karev? I did wonder." Cristina laughs, and Meredith elbows her side. "Ow." She whispers rubbing her ribs.
"You owe me one, you owe me a big one." Charlie laughs and begins to stitch up the wound on Darcy's face.
Darcy sits and flinches every so often as Charlie stitches her up. "Okay all done." Charlie smiles and places down the instruments.
"Nice work, Beck. Maybe you should put those hands to better use in plastics." Cristina says to her as she admires her friends work.
"These babies," she says wiggling her fingers, "belong on Peds." Charlie smiles and Cristina rolls her eyes.
"I can't stand you."
*
She's tidying the house. She's tidying the house because Charlie is working nights so she can avoid talking to Addison about that kiss at the wedding. So Addison tidies the house, tidies because she needs to stop the overwhelming thoughts in her brain telling her that something is wrong. She takes a second and leans against the kitchen island staring out into the yard, then her phone starts ringing. It's her brother.
"Arch?" She begins, he never usually called her this early
"Bizzy and the Captain are coming to Seattle."
"I- What?"
"They called and asked about you because you don't talk to them anymore so I just told them you were still in Seattle. They're coming to visit you."
"Archer!"
"I'm sorry, I don't want to subject Julia to them so we're going on vacation for the week they're coming."
"They've already planned it? Archer, I am going to murder you." He hangs up before she can say anything else. She shakes her head, she doesn't need this as well. Not her parents, the constant judgement from them is too much.
Addison calls Charlie, she doesn't pick up. She calls again, the faint sound of Charlie's ringtone sounds from upstairs. The phone still to her ear, she makes her way upstairs, Charlie's phone vibrates on the side table in their bedroom. "Charlie." She whispers and shakes her head. She hangs up and Charlie's phone sits on the lock screen. Messages from an unknown number light up the screen. Curiosity takes the better of her, she picks up the phone and reads and the messages.
That was a mistake.
She puts down Charlie's phone and lets out a breath, then leaves the house for the hospital.
She's standing in the scrub room, her hands on the scrub sink. She takes deep breathes and tries to stop the tears. The door swings open and Charlie opens the door, a smile on her face. Addison stands up, her back straight.
"Hey! I was thinking chicken parm for dinner tonight?" Charlie smiles and watches Addison stands in the scrub room. It's silent. "Addie, did you hear what I said?"
Suddenly, Addison speaks up. "Did you think I wouldn't find out?" Addison says to her, in a defeated tone. Charlie stares at her, waiting for her to explain. "I saw the messages, Charlotte. How Kara hoped to see you again and that she 'didn't mind being the other woman'." Charlie stands her hands on her hips looking around, anywhere but her wife's face. They're in the scrub room, scrubbing in for surgery c-section. Charlie's extramarital affairs are on display for all to witness. "Why didn't you tell me? That first night you came back home, why didn't you tell me then instead of being this coward? A person I thought never you were. Charlie, you're the type of person to jump in front of a bullet to save a stranger, not some coward who kept a secret from her wife."
"Addie-" Charlie takes a step towards her wife.
"No, let me finish. You had the chance, no, you had several chances to explain what happened and did you? No, you didn't, because you're a coward and cowards don't scrub in."
"What? Hang on-"
"You're not welcome in my OR, Charlotte," Addison says whilst, entering the OR, leaving Charlie alone.
"Fuck." She whispers.
Charlie sits in the gallery. Staring down at the surgery that she should have been in on.
"Hey Picasso," Charlie looks up and Alex stands in the doorway. "I thought you were supposed to be in on that surgery?" He nods to the OR where Addison is.
"We fought and she kicked me out."
"Ow." He winces and then takes a seat next to her.
"Wait, 'Picasso'?"
"Yang told me you stitched up the aftermath to a bar fight. She said the stitches were flawless."
"Why thank you." Charlie smiles and Alex wraps an arm around her shoulder.
They sit together, watching the surgery. Alex's arm wrapped around her shoulder, his thumb gently rubbing her arm. She tells him what happened at the wedding, tells him about the kiss and that she flew right back and that she still hasn't told Addison what happened.
"If she's not listening, then make her listen. Trap her in an elevator, lock her in an on-call room. Make her listen." Alex smiles and Charlie just rests her head on his shoulder, the tears begin to fall.
Charlie zones out as she sits in the residents' room
"Charlie?" George says in a quiet tone. She turns and smiles at her friend.
"What's up, George?"
"I...I got my results." Charlie stands up and walks over to her friend.
"And?"
"I passed." He smiles widely and Charlie wraps her arms around him. "Thank you for helping me study. You're a really good friend." He smiles.
"As are you, George."
Charlie smiles at her friend. If only she knew what happens next and how it would change her life forever.
sorry for the delay. a lot of stuff has happened and it's taken me a while to get through it. I'm working on them but it's slow, I'm sorry