My Personal Hell

Saturday, February 28,2015

Today, I wrote a fanfic one shot called You Are My Sunshine. It's an SnK/AoT fanfic basically telling about what I think would happen at the last battle against the Titans. Beware the feels. I was bawling my eyes out like a seven month old brat as I wrote it.

I've seen the promt- Imagine person A singing as person B slowly dies in their arms. But I've never read one like that so I decided to mak one. It's sad but worth reading.

I also started ANOTHER story called Ask Me. You can ask me anything and I will answer it.

ALSO, I updated Dragon in the Shadows. So I hope some of you read that to. That would be awesome.

I'm doing this thig were everythime a person hurts me I give myself a tattoo (once I get 1) old enough and 2) money to pay for it). Once I get to 20 tattoos I will stop letting people into my heart and the thing about these tattoos are that all have to be quotes that mean something to me as a person. I offically started it January 2014 but didn't tell anyone about it. Now I'm telling the internet about it. So far, I'm at 13. The quotes are-

1.) The only thing we are aloud to do is believe that we won't regret the choices we've made.

Eplination- Because it's true. I don't want to die with 100 regrets. I want to die and be happy with the way I lived. Not look back and say "I wish I could go back in time and change my decision.

2.) No matter what a person does, life is still a bitch, because id it was a slut then it would be easy.

Eplination- Also true. Life is like karma, what goes around, comes around. And if life was easy what's the piont in living. Even I'm not THAT lazy.

3.) The music sang a promise, but you played a lie.

Eplination- I see so many people saying 'I love you.' Do they even know what that entitles? Loving someone is trusting them with the power to completely destroy you, yet trusting them not to do it. If I say "I love you". It means that I'm trusting you with that power. And unless you are willing to give them that, don't say 'I love you' until you are.

4.) You always have two choices, your commitment verses your fear.

Eplination- Self-explainitory. You can stay in your confort zone or you can fight for what you believe in.

5.) When I die, don't come near my body, because my hand may nit be able to wipe away your tears anymore.

Eplination- If you are my friend. Do me a favor, don't come to my funeral, don't cry over me. I'm not worth it. I know that sounds like I' m giving up on the world, but I'm not. Seriously, guys. I'm one person out of billions. Don't morn and go find someone just as awesome as me (no this is not a suicide not, either).

6.) Crying is a good way to admit that you've had enough.

Eplination- It's proven that if you cry then there will be less stress on your mind and body, so if you have to cry go ahead and cry. Get it out. There's no reason to hold it in. If you get weird looks, so what? It doesn't matter it just means they care enough to acknowledge that you've had enough. Crying is not weakness. Weakness is that your not strong enough to be yourself

7.) Shortest horror story: Monday

Eplination- Everyone should know this one...

8.) It's called originallity. You should try it sometime.

Eplination- There are so many fake perople in the world, it's rediculous. You can look at just about anyone and all you'll see is a mask. People now judge other people by their looks. if they don't like the way they look. Then will stay as far away from you as they can be.

9.) Don't be surprised when I disappear.

Eplination- Not a suicide note. This one would be directed to my family. I've always wanted to go to Japan. Anybody that knows me should know that. My parents are strict assholes and have nothing in common with me. Because of that my parents don't make any effort to figure out ahy I like things tat they don't and why I do what I do. They stick to TV shows they know I'll watch with out complainling. That's it. When I told my mom that I was going to go to Japan after I get enough money, she turned to me and said (I don't know exact words) "They kill whales, so you shouldn't go." She puts down my dreams. I didn't ask her for her permission. I told what I was going to do and whay and she blows me off.

10.) I am not special. I'm just a limited adition.

Eplination- This is true I'm not going to be around forever. And considering there is only one of me. That does mean limited.

11.) WORK like you don't need the money. LIVE like you have never been hurt. DANCE like no one is watching.

Eplination- Work just cause you can. Live life to the fullest and don't have regrets is basically what that's saying.

12.) I'm not a psycho... I just like psychotic things.

Eplination- 'Crazy but Lazy' applies to this.

13.) It's funny. When you leave home and wander really far, you always think, 'I wnat to go home.' But of course, it's not the same. You can't live with it. You can't live with out it. And it seems likefrom then on there's a yearning for someplace that doesn't exist. I'm never completely at home anywhere.

Eplination- When I leave to go to Japan I'm going to come back at least once in my life and nothing here is going to be the same as I remeber it. Everything is always changing and growing around us. Once you leave there will always be that little voice int the back of your head that wants to go explore more and it will constantly battle your desire to be home (unless you made a new one or never had one to begin with).

Of cousre there will be designs to. Like for number three. That would be surrounded by music notes and four would be inside and Yin-Yang symbol.

I guess that's it for today, so have fun and live your life (did anyone notice the common themes of my story?).