One Maniac at a Time

Too perfect

Tara's POV

I got up and groaned, my head hurt so badly. What had happened last night?

~flashback~

It was New Years Eve.  Violet and her were drinking, something that was not legal.  

"This is fun I really love you." I said.  She smiled and kissed me.  We had gone to Kyle's party.  It was going pretty well.  Only half an hour till midnihgt.  

"I didn't know you couold drink so well." Violet said.

"You don't do so bad yourself." I replied.

"We probably are way too young for this shit." She said.

"Well, you know, I think I saw a few bottles of whiskey back in the kitchen.  I don't think anyone would miss it if we took one." I smirked.  she smiled.  We were both very intoxicated.  I grabbed whiskey as well as Kyle and his friend who was too drunk to speak.  We walked out into the cold.  I opened the bottle and started drinking it.

"Are you gonna finish that?"  Violet asked.

"Of course, I rbought you one." I giggled tossing her the bottle.  she too chugged but gave half to Kyle who gladly drank.

"I really love you." I whispered.  and then I blacked out.

~end of flashback~

Okay, I am hungover, very hungover.  I look over and see Violet asleep.  I smile but man does my head hurt. I go into my bathroom and down some advil and throw the bottle at vi to wake her up.  She gladly accepts the drugs.  We trudge downstairs to see Dad looking more hungover than us, he doesn't notice us. I however notice four mexicans asleep on the couch.

"Turtle." I hiss throwing a pillow at Tony.

"I'm up." He whined.

"Shut up tony." Jaime whines.  It became a pillow fight very quickly, and it was hlaf funny because everyone was very hungover.  I smiled.  It was nice.  Once everyone cleared out I sat and thought about what I wanted to do with my life this year, but came up empty.  I looked in my magic box, as I was now calling it.  (trigger warning) I drug out a silver blade and pressed it to my thigh without thinking, my brain  didn't register the blood, so I went deeper ignoring everything.  finally satisfied, I cleaned up (trigger end) I look around my room.  I felt like my skin idn't fit me well, I looked so off.  I didn't feel very real.  I felt like a ghost.  It was like Ethan was taking parts of me away, slowly, but enough to leave a dent.  I needed to shake this feeling.  I couldn't believe it was finally 2012. Life was happening, and yet I was still a part of it, even though I wanted to disappear.  I will have to work harder, be better.

Patrick's POV

Pete has been shutting me out since the night with Tara and the hospital, I was starting to wonder if we would ever get back together.  He just never let me in anymore.  I was worried he might start  hurting himself, now he has two kids instead of one, he needs to be careful, I don't want Tara to have to explain to her little brother why their father didn't want to live.  I miss the band. I want to get back together.  I was ready for it.

"Babe come back to bed." Elisa called. 

"Are you sure you can take all this?" I joked.

"Come at me tiger." She hissed. I smiled.

Pete's POV

I was talking to Vic about their next album that they were going to be working on.  

"I think you should really just put your heart into it." I told him.

"I guess, but I always want my music to be like that." He said.

"Make every word matter, it'll be great.  Tara loves you guys." I said smiling.

"How is everything going?" He asked.

"Honestly, I'm not sure. I don't know how to help her.  She has been through shit." I explained.

"Well, maybe if you trust us we could take her on tour with us next year, when she's in seventh grade.  It could be fun for her." Vic suggested.

"I'm sure she would love that.  Now I have to go work on some stuff." I said hugging Vic goodbye.  Everyone had been trickling out so no one really noticed.  It was finally peaceful.  I felt like I could breathe normally.  It would be alright.

Tara's POV

I took my board and skated down to Kyle's place.

"Stop I'm still hungover." He groaned as he asnwered the door.

"Well so am I." I replied.

"And how was that?" He asked.

"The drinking was great, but I'm bored, teach me how to pierce lips." I said.  I did this quite a bit, I would pierce people with him, it was sort of an underground thing.  

"Well someone is bored." He said.

"yeah and I didn't feel like being with my dad." I replied.

"Well, let's get started shall we?" He smirked.

Violet's POV

When I got home I looked around my room, it was covered in pictures of me and Tara, it looked so normal.  But I was so weird and messed up.  I didn't understand how it worked.  I felt like on some levels I was two different people. I wanted to one.  I felt so torn, all the time, I was a rag doll.  It destroys what ever is left inside.  

"Don't do it." I muttered to myself.  But before I knew it My thighs were bloody and my bathtub was red, I couldn't bare it.  I want more.  It feels so nice.  Every part of it.  I crave it.  It's going to be the end of me,  but I know it'll be okay.

Tara's POV

"Won't this stuff give me cancer?" I asked, as I lit up a blunt.

"Maybe, but everything fun does." Kyle replied.  I smoked, it felt nice, and fufilling.

"this is fun." I said giggling.

"that's the weed talking." He replied.

"Still, I don't give a shit, I would rather be stoned than alive." I said bitterly.

A/N reminder: DRUGS ARE BAD and you shouldn't do them, also FYI mental disorders featured in this story are not pretty, or "tragically beautiful" that is BS, also I don't know all details about the mental disorders so if I get stuff wrong, remeber I have some experience and people ecxperience things differently as well as the fact that this is fiction.  Hope you all have been enjoying.  Keep reading, don't forget to vote and comment :)