natasha romanoff x daughter one shots

having trouble eating

reader age- 14

⚠️ this chapter will talk about eating disorders please skip if this can be triggering to you⚠️

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natasha knew that you loved food. savoury, sweet, salty, and spicy. all of it. you loved trying new foods and experimenting in the kitchen. but lately it was getting kind of hard. first you stopped eating extra snacks throughout the day. then you cut back on some sugar. you stared working out and training more. then you started tracking how many calories you ate a day. it came to a rushing stop.

school was not helping the way you looked at yourself, but the main cause was social media. you saw all these beautiful girls with tiny waists, full chests and bottoms. but you didn't have that. you wanted that. you never thought you had a good body, but it wasn't too bad either. growing up you started to look in the mirror more and noticing things you wish you could change. your height, your weight, your face. things kept adding to the list the more you noticed them. finally, everything was on that dreadful list.

your mother did notice the lack in food you ate. she wondered if it was just because you were growing and you didn't have as big of an appetite. she always made sure she had your favorite snacks and fruit on hand in case you wanted them. but you never did.

you walked down the the kitchen bright and early on a monday morning.
"morning sweetheart" your mom said already sitting at the table with her first cup of coffee
"morning mom" you said with your cheerful voice. you knew what you were doing to your body by over working it and not eating. but the way you looked at it, it was helping. you had already lost 5 pounds which was major but still wasn't enough for you. you were great at hiding it by saying things like "i already ate" or "i'm not very hungry". walking to the fridge to get a water bottle you chugged it all down.
"woah slow down y/n" natasha said

"sorry, i'm just really thirsty" you said

natasha had been seeing you in the morning not eating much before you left for school. but today she was determined to see you eat.

"i made some pancakes that are on the stove" she said

"oh, i'm not very hungry"

"yep, but you fell asleep doing your homework last night that you didn't eat dinner. go get some."

"okay" you said trying to quickly figure out what to do because there was no way your mother would leave without seeing you eat. you went back into the kitchen to get some pancakes. you sat at the table with them in front of you. natasha was talking a sip of her coffee just glancing over the mug to watch you. she had no idea what was going on inside your head.
"i can't eat these"
"this has too many calories"
"i can always blame it on running the mile in p.e today"
"pull yourself together y/n she's not looking away"
you took the first dreadful bite. chewing it and swallowing it. it's almost like you could feel those 5 pounds you worked so hard to lose we're just added back onto your body. as much as you hating this you had to keep eating. but you had a plan. you finished your pancakes with a normal conversation with your mom. you glanced at the clock.

"15 minutes until the bus comes. cutting it close but it will work"

you got up from the table putting your dishes in the sink.

"i'm gonna go up to my room to study for a test i have tomorrow until the bus comes"

"okay sweetheart"

you went up to your room and closed the door behind you. you were scared for what you were about to do. you had never done it before. you trying talking yourself out of it but you had just lost your 2 day streak of not eating a single thing. you went into your bathroom that was connected to your bedroom and you went and sat down in front of the toilet. you didn't really know how to do it, all you knew is that you had to get those calories out of your system. you were throwing up as much as possible. trying to get all of the food out. you kept an eye on your phone making sure you wouldn't be late. you kept putting your fingers down your throat. it was painful but you had to do it. you just had to. finally you got all of the pancakes out of your system just in time to run downstairs, grab your backpack, kiss your mom goodbye and jump on the bus.

when you got to school you left completely normal. that was until p.e. you had to run the mile today. you were fine at first but around the half way mark was when it got tough. you tried to keep going but your stomach was cramping and you were getting dizzy. your friend caroline (if that's your name them make it maggie or something (: )
"hey are you okay? you don't look too good" caroline said
"yeah i'm fine.. i just need to sit do—and before you could finish your sentence your legs went weak underneath you and you feel to the ground.

-caroline got help and the school called your mom to come and pick you up. she was 1 hour away so she dropped everything and drove quickly. tony came and picked you up-

"where is she?!" natasha said bursting into the living room.

"she's in her rooms laying down. she woke up and bruce has checkup results."

she ran up to your room. you where laying there just staring at the ceiling.

"hey sweetheart... how are you feeling"

"fine"

"that's not true"

you knew why you passed out but you really didn't want her to find out.

"no mom i'm really fine"

"well i'm going to find bruce so he can tell me what happened"

"mom please, i'm really fine"

before you could say anything, she was out the door to find bruce. you waited anxiously in your bed for your mother to return. and when she did you knew that you would have to tell her everything. a few minutes later she walked in with a chart on a clip board.

"what does it say?" you said trying to act like you didn't know anything

"your blood sugar is really low, and so are your glucose levels. y/n when's the last time you ate?"

"this morning before i left for school... why"

she walks over to you and sits down on the edge of your bed. she looks at your eyes and she can see right through you. her mom instincts were telling her that you were lying.

"when's the last time you really ate..."

you didn't know what to say. you knew that this would change things. you knew she would be worried about you. and you know she would make sure you were eating enough. but deep deep deep down, you really hating this. you knew what you were doing to your body. you didn't want to tell her, but you felt you had to.

"2 days ago" you mumbled

"what! 2 days ago?" she yelled (but like no too loud, just raised her voice)

"i know your mad, i'm sorry. i'm really sorry" you had tears in your eyes

"baby no, i'm not mad at you. why haven't you eaten. and why did you eat this morning"

"i had to eat this morning because you were watching me. and i just can't do it mom. i literally open my phone and all i see is this  *you open your instagram to a punch of skinny girls* i want to look like them and i thought that if i did this, it would work. but i'm sorry"

it took her a second to fully process  what you were saying. it took her by surprise and it made her so sad. her little girl hated the way she looks so much that she was starving herself.

"baby... you are such a beautiful little women. and i'm not just saying that because you are my daughter. you are gorgeous and amazing and such a special light in this world. my world. i wake up everyday and your smile just lights up my morning. i know that seeing those girls can be hard. but you are beautiful and i don't want to you chance for anyone. okay?

*you were both crying at this point*

you couldn't say anything. you just wrapped your arms tight around her and you started crying into her chest. she comforted you and was giving you kisses on the head and she just held you. she held her baby close and didn't want to let her go.