straight and fast (chaesoo)

Hallucinogens

"Let's play spin the bottle." We are by the pool, away from the already wasted, sweaty bodies dancing inside the living room.

"What are we teenagers?" Jimin asked chuckling.

"And eww no. I don't wanna kiss any of you." Lisa said with disgust that made us all chuckle.

"It's not just us okay, I'll get the girls inside." Jungkook said with a smirk.

"Yeah I'm out. I don't want to be involved with Kook's hoes." I said standing up and Lisa followed while the guys don't seem to mind the idea and shrugged. My friends are whores I swear to god.

If it's the old me I know I wouldn't mind too, but she's the only girl I want and I don't want any other girls.

Lisa and I then just went to play beer pong with the others. Why did I fucking forgot that Lisa sucks at this game?

"Oh my fucking god Lisa! Remind me to never play this game with you as my teammate again." I told her as I drink the contents of the cup she's supposed to drink but can't anymore that made the two guys across us laugh.

This is my first time losing and I hate it. Lisa and I laid on the couch to help her sober up when Taehyung came with a devilish grin.

"Hey Sooya, I got some good stuff here if you wanna try." He said plopping on the couch beside me and showing me the pills. Lisa glared at him but couldn't argue because of her head.

"I know you need these right now, so this is on me." He said with a soft smile and hands me a plastic with a few inside it.

"You'll get over it." He said and pat my shoulder before leaving.

I looked at the pills and examined them. What will happen if I take them all in one go?

Let's find out.

I can see her everywhere.

I thought this was supposed to make me forget?

"Oh my god stop giving her booze!" I heard Lisa shouted at the guys but they just drunkenly laugh and gave me some more.

She just sobered up and now she's acting like our mom.

I chuckled as we all cheered and chugged our drinks.

"This is not a healthy way to grief Jisoo." Lisa scolded but I just ignored her and continue drinking just to get rid of the pain I'm feeling right now.

It should've been me, not her. I should've been the one who insisted to get it for her. I should've never let her go alone.

"Come on dude, that's enough. You've had enough." Lisa said and I think she's right as I feel everything spin. Fuck I'm dizzy, I'm gonna throw up.

So I quickly run to the bathroom and puke my guts out. Oh my god, my head is spinning.

"You should've listened to Lisa." Chaeyoung said soothing my back as I puke.

She's not real. This is all because if that fucking drugs. She's not real.

I stood up and wash my face in the sink. I looked at my reflection in the mirror and I see her again.

By the door, looking at me worriedly.

She's not real.

So I splash my face with water again.

Why isn't she leaving? I would want her to stay if she don't leave now.

"You should rest. Let's get you to bed." She said as I walk out the bathroom.

I looked for an empty room when I reached the second floor and plop myself on the bed.

I thought I would be able to sleep instantly but the pounding in my head keeps me from doing so.

I looked up the ceiling and closed my eyes shut when I heard her voice, singing me to sleep.

God knows how much I miss her voice, how much I miss her. All I wanna do is bring her back. If only I could bring her back.

I sat up and look at her as she sings. She's looking at me like she knows what I'm feeling, like she knows I miss her, like she knows I lie awake at night thinking of what could've beens, like she knows I can't get her off my mind, like she's real.

I reached for her face in which she lean into as she closed her eyes. I couldn't contain a sob as I stare at her beautiful face. God I wish she's real.

I fucking miss her.

She looks stunning even with just the light slipping through the windows that's illuminating the room.

If someone walks in, would they see her? Would the see how beautiful she looks? Would they see this angel in front of me?

"Please stop crying." She whispered softly.

"I'm sorry." I sobbed.

"I'm so sorry Chaeyoung, shouldn't have let you go alone."

"I should've come with you. I could've saved you, or I could have been with you all along. Y-you didn't deserve to be left alone."

"You just did what I asked you to do Jisoo. It's not your fault."

"My guitar. You go, I'll get it first." Chaeyoung said as she look up at where we came from. She tried to let go of my hand and urge me to go ahead but I just pulled her with me and as I say,

"Chaeng no! Come on! Forget it please let's go!"

"I'll be quick I promise." She said as she gently push me down the stairs and quickly ran back up the stairs when I let go.

"CHAEYOUNG!" I shouted as I try to follow her but the burning ceiling gave in, blocking my way to her.

"Jisoo go! I could find my way out. Just go please!" Chaeyoung pleaded and I shake my head as I felt tears run down my face. Fuck, I need to get to her. She can't go back up there alone.

"Fuck Chaeyoung! Come back here please!" 

"Listen, go and call for help. Okay? Please?"  She pleaded as I shake my head because I just can't leave her here. This place is about to be burned down.

I was about to jump into the fire to get to her when another block of wood fell near her.

Fucking hell! Fuck! I fucking hate that I can't do anything, fuck!

"I will be quick promise." She yelled  and run, leaving me with nothing else but follow what she asked me to do. And that's what I did, I run the opposite way with a heavy heart to call for help.

Not knowing that that was the last time that I will ever see her face.