The Red Eyed Demon

Back to School

Grabbing the keys to my Ford Mustang GT/CS convertible I headed out the door. It was a nice looking, but small, black car. Being a rich kid did come with its perks. This being one of them. I could afford whatever car I wanted. Dis advantage, well some people tried to be friends with me because of my money. But being me, that didn't happen very often.

I'm not a very appealing girl. I'm not some perfect and porcelain Barbie doll. But according to a lot of people I could look like one. I don't see it, but others do.

I have stick straight blonde hair. Not like gross versions of blonde that are obviously died either. Like natural bleach blonde. Dis advantage of my hair, it was frizzy and not like only a few strands stood up. It was like every god damn hair wanted to stick up. I have a nice grey eyes. That turned a slight shade of blue when I was pissed off. I personally find my eyes a very gross, and dull color. But others seem to love it. Oh well, people be weird.

For some reason when I think about my life, I always seem to think of 'Tove Lo Habits'. I don't know why, but at the same time I really do. Probably because after Marky died. In order to try and forget him, I resorted to weed. I would get high every single chance I had. I would get so high I couldn't even tell you where I was twenty minutes before hand. At least I dont do fucking drugs, or cigarettes or some shit like that.

Weed isn't even slightly as bad as cigarettes or drugs. Nobody has ever died of smoking weed. I will admit I drink tho. I drink A LOT! I can't ever seem to get high or drunk enough to forget Marky tho. I have never done any dumb shit like being high, or drunk and then going and driving. Even when I have a hangover, I don't go out and drive. I'm not fucking stupid. Yes, I want to die. But I would rather my liver fails on me because of the drinking. Then have me be found on the hood of my car, for smashing through my windshield after hitting a tree or some shit.

As I said before I'm not fucking stupid, but I'm definitely not the smartest. I'm also naive, very naive. I will do almost anything you ask me to do. I don't get crushes often, but when I do, I fall. HARD! It's not your average crush. Where you might get a little flustered talking to them. When you might take a different route in the hall just so you can say 'hi' to them in the hall.

When I get a crush, it's constantly avoiding them in the halls. Because if I saw them I would so easily give it away that I like them. Then if they found out I would beat myself up about it. I won't go to school for over a week. Every night I would lay in my bed and think about everything little thing about them. Just letting you know I'm saying them because for me it could be either gender. I'm bisexual. But I think about them, I replay their voice in my head.

I image situations where they ask me out. Obviously knowing it won't happen. I image situations where I ask them out. But that doesn't happen either because I'm to much of a fucking pussey.

I open the door to my car and hop in. I love the feeling of my hands on the wheel and the satisfaction that this really is my car. Yes. I know I said before I was a rich kid. So i can't really have satisfaction in 'earning' my car. Wait, yes I can! I did earn my car. I was failing all of my classes in my freshman year of high school. I had D's and F's literally in everything. My parents said if I could get all my grades up and by that they meant A+ work. If I got my grades up, before the school year ended, and manage to keep my work average at A+ until I finally got my drivers license, they would get me whatever car I wanted. So of course I picked a Ford! Fords are fucking beast!

I put my car into drive, and headed off to prison-ugh err, um I mean school. As I am driving I turn on my radio, and of course with my luck the first song I hear is the only song in this world that annoys the life out of me. Chandelier by whatever the fuck that chicks name is.