Picture Perfect Night Sky

25 ¦ Margaret Fellice

What was I thinking? Asking Jacob to be my assistant? Just to make him be close to Jasmine? This is some masochist shit I'm doing. I don't even like the guy, but why do I feel like the whole world just crush me right straight on my chest. I feel empty, and I don't know why. Why is that actually? Is it possible that I like the guy? There's no fucking way. Why the hell am I gonna fall in love with a guy like him anyway? He's too impulsive and annoying for me, but he's so cute when he tries to annoy the crap out of me.

Groaning ever so loudly, resting my head back on the sofa. Oh my God, what's happening to my brain? I don't want to act all lovey-dovey to some guy I just met like a whole week. There's just something about his attitude and personality that makes my heart do a somersault.

I sip on my cute kitty cat mug that my mom has bought it for me last year. Ever since that purchased occurred, I always used this mug to make coffee with. If I'm being honest right now, this is my fifth coffee for the night. I don't know what brings me to drink coffee at night, but surprisingly, I didn't palpitate. I was hoping that I will.

I like my coffee as I like Jacob.

Oh, fucking stop with the guy. He isn't that cute anyway. His monobrow is. I swear to God, I'm gonna find a way to shut that voice inside my head. My brain keeps on rambling that I like the guy, but clearly, I don't. Why won't you cooperate with me brain? Why can't you just accept that you like him? I'm gonna see if there's a way to turn off the voices inside my head. In the future at least, for now, I need to stay calm.

I take another big sip of my coffee, still sitting on the couch watching anything that comes out in Netflix. I don't have the energy to move freely now. Not after that pathetic deal we made in the library. Heck, I'm still in my go-to outfit from the date with Nancy. I'm just sitting here waiting for Noah to hear me rant again, it's a cycle thing. Where the heck is he? I just need him to make me calm a bit down.

All this waiting and staring at the TV, makes me want to melt into the sofa and never to be seen again. Maybe I could try listening to music, just to silent down the voices inside my head. Picking up my phone from the coffee table, opening up my Spotify playlist and press shuffle. Time to sit back and vibe around the music that's playing. Laying my back on the sofa, closing my eyes, getting myself ready to vibe with the music.

Wow, perfect timing Spotify. Perfect fucking timing. I'm pretty sure Spotify can understand people's minds because playing Play Date by Melanie Martinez is quite ironic to what I'm experiencing right now. Too late to change the music, and also, I like Melanie Martinez, so perhaps I'll listen through this song.

Is it possible that I just love his presence? The song ain't helping me to ignore my feelings to that guy. He's already in love with another person, why even bother to fall in love to him? I just need to hope Noah is on his way back, I really need to let all this annoyance inside my brain to be eliminated.

Mouthing out the lyrics as I keep resting my head back on the sofa. Trying to ignore all these voices telling me that I like him. I know it's unhealthy to force something in your mind, but at this point I'm desperate just to stop thinking that I like him or anything.

Knock. Knock. Knock.

Suddenly there's a soft knock on the door as I keep vibing to the song. I really am not in the mood to move around even the slightest inch away from this sofa, but I need to open the door for whoever is knocking. I hope it's Noah. Wait, if it's Noah, shouldn't he have a spare key and open the door already instead of keep knocking? What if he just wants to annoy me or something?

Knock. Knock. Knock.

This dude has no patience in him, huh? Such persistence that annoys me. Just wait for a minute okay, I need to gather all of my will to move. Which may take an hour or so. Perhaps a year, just to forget about someone's existence.