Author's note
Hi guy.
I just decided to just post the book two of Change, Changes, Changed here. Tinamad na ko paghiwalayin si book one at book two. Baka din kasi malimutan ko si #50shadesofK chozz!
Again Grazzi Miefs!
*************Cambio - spanish word, means CHANGE.
Un cambio para bien.
Fast forward - 2018 (Madrid, Spain)
Mika
A change for the better. I always remind myself about that rule whenever I felt the pain of the past. Three years had past but still I'm broken and always longing for Kiefer. No one of us thought that we will end up like this. Me, sad and full of what if's but I need to leave him. I need to escaped everything about there, about the controversies, about the chaos and about us.
I missed him but I need to let go and forget everything that happened between the two of us.
Iniwan ko sya kahit alam ko gusto nya lumaban kami. I knew he did everything to defend and protect me. But I'm coward. Natakot ako sa lahat ng taong hinusgahan ako. Lalo na ung mga taong nagsabing di ako dapat para sa isang Kiefer Ravena. Siguro nga tama sila. Di ako dapat para sa kanya kasi tinakbuhan ko sya. Sumuko ako. Natakot na baguhin yung sistema ng buhay ko. Pero sa ginawa ko pagtakbo lalo din nagbago ang buhay ko. I lost everything. I lost my happiness. I lost Kiefer.
I've been living here in Madrid for three years now. No one knew about it except my Kuya Perry. Si kuya ung tumulong sakin para takasan lahat ng nangyari sa Pilipinas.
Nung naexposed ung about sa amin ni Kiefer, si Kuya Perry ang una naging kakampi at dumamay sakin. He went home even if our Dad hates him. At sya din ung reason kung bakit ko pinili lumayo. When he learned that our Dad was forcing me to marry Kris, hindi payag si Kuya Perry. He convinced me to go with him. Sinabi nya sakin na wag ako magdecide ng mali ulit. Nagkamali na ko kya dapat matuto na ko. He knows that I don't love Kris. For my kuya di baleng iwanan si Kris kesa pakasalan ko. Mas lalo lang daw ako magsasuffer if I will marry Kris. Well true enough because as soon as I escaped, the lings told me that it's Kris who exposed all the details about me and Kiefer. Umamin kasi si Kris dun sa friend nya na dinedate ni Jessey. Sa isip ko quits na kami. I've made him broken and so I am.
My Kuya first brought me to Dubai. Dun din kasi sya naka base as a pilot from Emirates. Nung una naenjoy ko ung Dubai but di din pwede na lage nakadepende kay Kuya. So when he asked me to come in Spain dahil dun sya naka assigned for a couple of flights, I grabbed it.
I went to Madrid as a tourist then find a job and did all my papers and documents there for me to lived there legally. I got a job in a private clinic who expertise for patients suffering from dementia and alzheimers cases. They hired me as a secretary/psychologist assistant in that clinic.
In this place I became independent. I've learned to live all by myself. Walang Yaya Marge. Walang car, walang driver at mas lalong walang sariling condo. In here, di ako mayaman. I'm sharing a house with a Filipino couple, whom I met when I first came here. Si Kito at Penny. They also became my friends and treats me really well like a family.
Kito work as a banker and Penny work as a nursing assistant, same sa clinic kung saan ako nagwowork. Dahil din sakanila medyo nalilimutan ko ung homesick and ung past ko.
I've told them about my past. Both of them got shocked. They've known Kiefer as the popular basketball player in the Philippines. Nanghinayang sila sa love story ko. And everytime I've think about that I just breathe in, breathe out. God! I missed him.
Yup it's true, nakakapanghinayang naman talaga. Both of us are ready to fight for it but because I felt degraded and judged by everyone about us, I got scared to faced it. Scared to change everything.
Until now I stalked Kiefer in his twitter and IG account and every news about him. Para ako lagi nagfafangirl sakanya. I even created a dummy twitter account just to have a glimpse of his life now.
He's engaged now. A girl named Agatha is his new girl and soon to be wife. Nung una ko nalaman, umiyak ako ng three straight days. I blamed myself for being so coward. Nawala sya sakin and wala na talaga kami.
It's my fault why we end up like this. I end up this - sad, always alone.
I decided to change my life but the changes that happened was not the changed that I really want. But I can't change it now. It's too late and I'm late.
Kiefer
Three years had past but still I missed her. Lot of changes that had happened around me but still I'm hoping to see her again. I just want us to have a closure.
Masakit kasi ung taong akala mo at nangako sayo ilalaban ka nawala na lang bigla. Gusto ko magalit sakanya pero I know that it will be stupid. I know how broken she was the last time I saw her. I love her so much but she left me. I don't know what happened to her.
Nung una lage ko sya hinahanap. Kung saan saan pa ko nakarating. Kasama ko pa ung parents nya at si Kris pati Lings hanapin sya. Pero wala talaga. Sa isip ko di namin sya makikita kung talagang sinadya nya magtago. Maybe it's her decision to hide and escaped all the things that happened to her. Alam ko nasaktan sya. Gusto ko naman sya damayan pero sya ung pumili lumayo sakin.
Then I stopped looking for her. Di dahil sa suko na ko or pagod. I stop because it's the right thing to do. I need to move on. She doesn't like me to fight for us and even her doesn't like to fight for me.
At first it's hard to accept but I need to do it for myself. Nagbago ung life ko nung iniwan nya ako. Nung una bumalik ung habit ko na flavour of the month but when I met, Agatha, I changed.
She did changed me. Healed my broken heart and soul. Funny though, when we first met, were both drank and were both healing ourselves. Mending broken heart by vodka. At ang epic same din kami ng situation. Pinagkaiba lang namin sya ung niloko di gaya ko ano ang nanloko. Then we became friends then suddenly we decided to date then now were engaged.
Although she knew about Mika, she's really open minded and cool with it. Kagaya ni Mika magaan at simple din sya kasama. Walang arte.
Isa na lang yung gusto ko bago sana ako ikasal, I get a chance to face Mika again. Gusto ko lang ng closure at bakit sya tumakbo. Sana soon. Sana makita ko na sya.