Con la Cumpleanera - spanish, means WITH THE BIRTHDAY GIRL
Kiefer
Saturday morning I rose up really early. I'm stil here in the beautiful, blissful island of Boracay. Before the break of dawn is my flight back to Manila. After three days of staying here I'm coming back where I belong, where reality will somehow hit me again.
Last three days ago I went here to unwind as a reward for myself in leading the Gilas Cadet team from bagging the gold medal. My third Seagames gold medal. I feel so blessed coz by the age of 21, I can say slowly little by little all my dream are coming true. Slowly I achieved my goals. At 21, I'm at my happiest. The fame, the careers, my family, friends, lots of supporters and of course a gorgeous girl with a beautiful soul beside me. They were all there for me. To guide, to keep me motivated, inspired me to push myself more harder and wiser. I can't thank them enough on how grateful I am to have and be with them.
But these past few weeks is a hell roller coaster ride of emotion.
Aaminin ko isa sa dahilan bakit ko ginusto lumayo at mapag isa di dahil sa gusto ko mag unwind o relax. Ginusto ko mapag isa kasi hindi ko na alam kung anu ung dapat ko maramdaman.
Mahal ko sya. Mahal na mahal na mahal. Pero bakit ko nga ba binitawan? Hindi ko rin alam.
I know it may sound selfish, but I rather leave her than getting hurt at the end.
Oo takot ako masaktan kasi duwag akong makita syang nasasaktan dahil sakin. Dahil sa sobrang pagmamahal ko natatakot ako masakal ko na sya at di nya magawa yung mga gusto nya. Habang maaga pa. Habang kaya ko, luluwagan ko muna ang tali na nag uugnay sa amin dalawa.
But yesterday while I was walking by the shore, I stumbled a great life lesson.
Flashback
Friday, June 19
Third day of finding myself and reflecting. But is situation really helping me? Gago ko. Sinungaling ka Kiefer. Pinaka sinungaling, pati sarili mo niloloko mo. Sigaw ng isip ko.
Kung sana ok kami. Kung sana hindi naging ganito ung decision ko, sana kasama ko syang naglakakad ngayon dito sa tabi ng dagat.
Walking by the beach, side by side, holding hands and both of us are smiling as we watch the sunset. The pink and purple sky and the blazing orange ray of sun as it set over the horizon will be our witness as I kiss her.
Pero eto ako ngayon, nag iisa. Prenteng nakaupo sa puting buhangin, Nakatanaw sa malayo. Mukhang tanga. Ang talino ko rin naman kasi, unwind pa ko nalalaman eh magmukmok ang tamang term dun.
"Namimis mo noh?"
A guy approached me suddenly. When I looked at his way, I saw a tall guy probably same as height as Mika. Maputi pero di naman tisoy. Probably ung age nya pwedeng late 20's or early 30's na sya. Medyo may kalakihan din ung katawan nya.
"Huh? Excuse me but do I know you?"
"Of course you don't know me. I'm just a basketball fanatic. Pero di mo ko fan ah. Hindi ako member ng miefer community."
"Sir I don't want to be rude but I think I'd better go ahead."
I stood up and was about to walk out when he spoke again.
"Matapang ka Ravena. Kahit mahal mo sya pinakawalan mo."
"Huh?"
"Bingi ka ba? Ang sabi ko matapang ka kasi kahit mahal mo pinakawalan mo sya. Hanga ako sayo kasi hindi ka makasarili na ikulong yung babaeng mahal mo. Katangahan kasi ung kasabihan na pag mahal mo wag mo papakawalan."
