The Friend Zone

Chapter One: Introduction To My Life.

"I have always liked you more than a friend, like, since high school, like, I don't know_"

"I was really not expecting this".

"This date is like, for you, and I was wondering if you, like, wanna go with me?"

"Omg!" the girl covers her face with her hands "Yes, of course, I mean you're my best friend!"

"Omg! thank you this made me so happy!"

"Awww!" I sigh as I peer at the TV screen "That is so cute."

My best friend Jasmine nods her head, as she shoves more ramen noodles in her mouth, and talks as she chews "Yeah, but in movies, a guy wouldn't need a TV show and a camera crew to confess his feeling towards someone."

"In movies a guy can also jump from a 10 feet building and reach the ground safely" I reply.

As a montage of the after scenes where the now 'couple' describe how happy they are and how they thank MTV for this I say "I wish I could do that."

"Do what?" Jasmine mumbles distractedly.

"Confess to Sam that I love him" I sigh.

"You can."

I peer at Jasmine to see if she was kidding, but to my astonishment she's totally serious "Are you crazy?" I exclaim "Of course I can't do that."

"Why not?"

"Well..." I search my mind for a good reason but when I fail I just end up saying "because I can't!"

"Just think about it," Jasmine's eyes are alight as if she has stumbled across a brilliant idea "If those idiots in TV can do it, so can you!"

"But I have been best friends with Sam since we were 10." I mutter.

"So? It’s still the same, you can beautify yourself, and when it's time you just tell him."

I have no reply for this.

"Dude, look it's not a matter of life and death_" "It is to me." "_He either says no, and then you can move on, no longer keep thinking what if, or he'll say yes, and then you'll live happily ever after, in the kingdom of Everdeen."

Maybe Jasmine is right.

But I don't let myself think about it....too much.

I wake up the next morning to the shrill of the damned machine I also refer to as my alarm, I imagine waking up enough, just to go Wal-Mart and purchase a baseball bat, then drive back home, still in my PJ's, climb the stairs, and with all the power given to me by God and the state of Iowa, I hit it as much as I can, game over appears at the top of the screen, my imaginations are in cartoon.

But as satisfactory as that image might be, I have to get up and face real life.

So, with sleep still haunting my eyes, singing a lullaby to fall back into its arms, like Mrs. Tucson’s geography class, I enter my bathroom, the harsh light falls on my still sensitive eyes and forces me to squeeze them shut, until they have finally adjusted to the light, when I feel it's safe to open them again, I go on about my usual business, until every last tooth has been brushed, and every last hair has been combed.

I stumble to my room, like a drunk, and into the kingdom of the wardrobe, I tread, it's a very dangerous kingdom of colors and shapes, red, blue, grey, pink, orange, yellow, it's blinding, my brain can't simply function with so many colors around, so blindly I select garments, and pray to god they match.

They kind of do, Jeans, my Choco-pops shirt, and a grey hoodie, not bad.

I hastily pull them on, and squeeze my converse shoes into my too large feet, ok, then I'm done, looking at my watch I conclude, that I have been fully dressed and showered in 9 minutes,2 minutes left, not bad, but right when I'm about to exit my room, I remember that something is missing, what is it, well, my shoulders feel too light, oh yeah, my back-pack, where is it?, a quick scan around the room locates the bag to be thrown in the south left corner of the room, aka, near my bed, I make a dash to the bag, and as fast as I can I run out of the room, imagining the countdown ticking 3, 2, 1, and a big explosion occurs.