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︶︶︶︶︶꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶꒷꒦︶︶︶︶꒷꒦︶
╰─ ꒰꒰ ⚠️TW⚠️
Yoongi felt like it was the end of the world.
He fucked things up with Namjoon and Hoseok. He even felt like Dohwan and Minho are giving up on him. He was crying in his room, both of the male's weren't home which had Yoongi having the opportunity to do something horrible to himself.
Yoongi shakily looks at his wrist where his old scars were, still being covered by those colorful tattoos. He could've continued right there..but he'll ruin his cute tattoo. Yoongi closed his eyes tight. He remembers Namjoon kissing his scars. It felt like nothing else mattered. Only Namjoon's in those days.
Yoongi decided to do the worse thing yet.
No. Not suicide. That's too easy. He got up from his bed and left his room, going straight towards the kitchen. Yoongi started to dig through one of the drawers that had small tools in it that are easy to take out. He spotted the razor blades, a group of them. He just wanted one of them. He takes the razor blade out, closing the drawer.
Yoongi couldn't help to stare at the blade. Oh, how he remembers that he cut himself without Jeongguk knowing. He remembered Jeongguk walking in and immediately grabbing the blade out of his hand. It was a horrible day for Yoongi.
Now, this is just another horrible day. Yoongi, with teary eyes, went back to his bedroom. He closed his door and locked himself in. This time, he wasn't thinking about putting the cuts on his wrist like the usual spot. They need to be more hidden.
Yoongi tries to hold in his cries as he lifts up the left leg part of his boxers, tears rolling down his face as he pressed the blade on his inner thigh, sliding it across. Remembering the pain made him cry even worse, continuing to make the cuts over and over again.
Namjoon's soft smile. How carefully he held Yoongi. No aggressive touch. How Namjoon held Yoongi's face when he cries and comforts him. Namjoon would caress Yoongi's scars randomly. All those amazing thoughts..easily fade away by what Yoongi did.
My fault. My fault. My fault. My fault. My fault. Yoongi could only hear those two words every time he makes a new fresh cut.
For what Jackson said, he's realizing Jackson's right. Namjoon made a complete mistake bringing his own lover to someone that he was fucking. Namjoon closed his eyes tight and lowered his head, sighing as he rubbed his temples.
"I'm so fucking dumb..." He mumbles to himself, groaning from his stupid thoughts.
Namjoon was at work, his hand still recovering from the poor stitches two years ago. He kept rubbing his temple, ignoring the sound of the door dinging and opening. The customer walked up to the register, oddly staring at the male who's in their thoughts.
"Um. Namjoon?"
Namjoon looks up at the customer, that happens to be someone he doesn't want to talk to. "Please tell me you're just getting flowers or anything plant related." He knits his brows. "I don't want to talk to you. Not now. Not ever."
Hoseok sighs. "I know you don't want to, but please. I really need to talk to you."
"Did you not just hear me? Buy a plant or get—"
"I got rid of Yoongi."
Namjoon blinks, looking at him. "What?"
"I'm not friends with him anymore. I pushed myself away from him." Hoseok says.
"I didn't tell you to do that."
"I did it myself."
Namjoon crossed his arms, raising a brow. "I don't think you did."
"Why do you say that?" Hoseok knits his brows.
"Yoongi connects. He clings. You didn't get rid of him. He'll come back."
"How do you even know that?"
Namjoon fluttered his eyes down. "I..It doesn't matter now." He looks back up at him. "I just know that he clings like he did with Jeongguk."
𖡼.𖤣𖥧𖡼.𖤣𖥧
i'm sorry ):
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