"Last night was amazing" I whisper while waking up in her strong arms that felt like a safe haven to me. As if in her arms, nobody could hurt me... Bette couldn't hurt me...
"Something has been on my mind though..."
I look at Carrie questionably.
She takes a deep breath and I can feel her hand tremble while it's wrapped around my naked body.
"Did something happen between you and Bette while I was gone?"
It was a question I should have expected yet it still surprised me. Thoughts rapidly go through my mind. Should I tell her the truth or lie?
The thing with lies is that they are only temporary bandaids, they hide a truth from her that will make her feel better and most of all, it won't destroy the trust she has for me. But this lie would only conceal a truth that is still hidden underneath it. The truth shall remain hidden until I or someone else exposes it and this would make it so much worse. Carrie would be destroyed, her heart shattered, her trust faded completely. Telling her the truth now would hurt her, but telling her a lie would destroy her beyond repair. I didn't want to lie to her, I wanted to be honest, because only then a relationship can succeed.
"Yes... I'm sorry..."
I knew my words hurt her, but her asking me about it meant that a part of her expected it already.
"Is it over?" She asks with a crack in her voice.
"More than ever."
Carrie untangles herself from our loving embrace that I had wanted to last forever and gets up from the bed.
"I need some time to myself."
She pulls on last nights clothes and disappears from the bedroom. Shortly after I hear the front door close with a loud bang.
I decide to take a shower, to clear my mind. A million things go through my mind, but most of all... Carrie went through my mind. I had hurt her so much, when she has been nothing but good to me. Carrie is kind, loving and most of all she's honest and I value honesty more than anything in a relationship. How could Bette be the love of my life when she doesn't even respect me enough to be honest? When she keeps running towards other women and betrays me so easily. Is that what she calls true love? For her to shatter me, over and over. Bette's love is like poison and the poison that I kept drinking, little by little would one day be the death of me if I hadn't given up on her false love.
This had to be the end between us, there was nothing left to fight for anymore. When it's this hard for someone to be honest and loyal to you then I doubt if they ever loved you at all.
I get out of the shower that have seemed to last an eternity, dry myself off and quickly get dressed.
It's time to buy myself a new phone, one that Bette doesn't have the number of.
At the store my eyes are quickly set on a Samsung Galaxy, a brand that has never disappointed me. I buy the phone and let the store set it up for me, I never was that good with things like this and this was much easier and faster.
At home I text everyone but Bette my new number, only to quickly get a reply from Alice.
"You need to come to Dana's, quick! Bette started making petty comments towards Carrie and Carrie punched her!"
