Better Than Onions

CHAPTER 11

For the first time in forever, I am excited to go to school tomorrow.

Last night, me and my sister got in a fight. Every time I tried to sleep, I kept imagining Shrek with blue hair and I started laughing again. My sister got so annoyed that she punched me in the face. I punched her back.

She flew across the room and now she is in hospital. Whoops!

I'm so excited to see the outcome of my prank that when I walk out of my house I don't see the person in front of me until it is far far too late.

"I'm so sorry!" I apologise, as I step back from the person I just walked into.

I hear a deep laugh and my head snaps up.

"Chris!" I exclaim, hugging him. "Are you ok? I was so worried about you!"

"I'm fine" Chris says. "I was a little bruised but it was nothing I haven't dealt with before"

Nothing I haven't dealt with before. What did that mean? Does he usually get thrown out a window?

Don't be stupid. I scold myself. He's your best friend, you haven't seen him since you moved away and you're worrying about how many times he's been thrown out a window?

"What are you doing here?" I ask him.

"I wanted to walk you to school, if that's ok?" He smiles shyly at me, and I feeel myself blushing. Chris' shyness is a good change from Shrek's big ego.

"What were you laughing about?" He asks, interrupting me from my thoughts. "When you walked into me, you were laughing about something"

"Oh!" I smile and begin telling him about my prank. At the end, Chris is almost crying with laughter.

"You're so funny and smart Julia!" He laughs.

"Thank you" I giggle. "I'm glad someone thinks it's funny"

"Don't you have friends at school?" Chris asks.

I hesitate. Because I'm beginning to compare Chris to my new friends and I've suddenly realised that they aren't good friends at all.

Edward was a good friend at first but now he's spoiled everything with his moodiness and his strange protective side and his not telling me anything. Dumbkedore only cares about his beard and his stupid hair. He always cancels plans because he wants to wash his hair. And Snape... Snape is weird and not in a good way. He hides under peoples beds and has an obsession with a girl who has barely even looked at him. Are they really my friends?

I sigh. "I guess I do... but they're not great friends like you, Chris"

"Do they know about... the thing?" he asks.

I shut my eyes.

Beep.

I wake up in a white bed, in a tiny room.

Beep. Beep.

I turn my head left. A jolt of pain shoots through me and black begins to cloud my vision. I blink rapidly trying to restore my sight, and when it clears again, I find myself facing a machine. There's a smal screen with a jagged line on it and a number that keeps changing. I stare in confusion at it. I've seen this before... but where?

A woman entered the room. She ipens her mouth.

"JULIA!"

I look up suddenly to find Chris shaking my shoulders, his concerned face inches from mine.

"What happened? You completely zoned out for about six minutes!"

"Sorry" I mutter.

"Sorry? Sorry isn't-" he sighs, dropping his hands from my shoulders. "Never mind. I was just worried. Please don't do that ever again, you scared me"

Although he's dropped his hands from my shoulders, his face still hovers in front of mine, his cheesy smell filling my nostrils as I breathe in his scent.

I want to drown in this scent forever. I want to make a perfume of it and wear it every day.

"Tell me you won't" he says.

I feel dizzy. What were we talking about? I can't remember. I can't even remember my own name. All I can think of is Chris.

But he's still standing in front of me, waiting for my answet so I stutter, "I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i w-w-w-wont"

"Good gorl" he smiles. Then, he closes the gap between us and kisses me.

His lips taste even cheesier than his breath. And a part of me is screaming in happiness internally, because this is what I've been waiting for, ever since we met when we were twelve, and he told me I looked like a giraffe.

And still...

A part of me is thinking of a certain green ogre, who smells like onions....

What is wrong with you?? I almost scream at myself. Why am I thinking of Shrek when I am kissing teh love of my life?

Chris pulls back, frowning as if he realises that I'm thinking of someone else. He studies my face and then smiles, "Come on. You're going to be late"

****

Chris' kiss almost made me forget about my prank, until Dumbledore and Edward run up to me.

"Have you seen?" Edward gasps.

"Seen what?" I ask.

"Shrek!" Edward says happily. "His skin is blue!"

I suddenly remember the prank and my heart floods with joy. It worked! Now no girl will ever want Shrek ever again.

Fumbledore watches me carefully. Then his eyes brighten and he laughs, "it was you, wasn't it Julia?"

I grin at him, forgetting that Edward is there until he grabs my shoulders and yanks me around to face him. He's so mad that his face is tomato-red and steam is coming out of his ears.

"IT WAS YOU?" he yells.

Shaking, I smile nervously. "Aren't you glad? Your enemy has blue skin!"

"NO IM NOT GLAD IM MAD"

"Hey, that rhymed!" Dumbledore says happily. "Mad and glad. Haha-"

He sees us staring at him and quickly shuts up.

"I TOLD TOU NOT TO TALK TO OTHER BOYS JULIA AND WHAT DO YOU DO? YOU PRANK HIM. HIW MANY OTHER BOYS HAVE YOU BEEN FLIRTONG WITH?"

I think of Chris' kids from this morning. "N-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-no one"

But he must have sensed my lie because he pushes me away and begins to sob uncontrollably.

"Edward-" I try to talk to him but he just cries louder.

Snot dribbling out of his nose, he runs over to the field and begins ripping grass and throwing it in the air.

Then he hugs a tree.

It takes me a while to realise that actually no he's not hugging it, he's trying to rip it out of the ground like he did with the grass.

I sigh. How dumb can this boy be?

"Edward you can't rip trees out of the ground unless you're some superhuman" I call over to him.

He ignores me and continues hugging - sorry ripping out - the tree. He looks so stupid that I can't help but laugh a little.

My laughter stops, however, when the tree topples over, and Edward holds it up like a trophy.

He rips off his shirt, revealing sparkling skin beneath, and roars. I gasp, did he roll in glitter this morning?

Then he throws the tree into someone's car, crushing it completely. He turns and looks at me, his skin glittering.

"Edward" I breathe. "What are you?"