deja vu - sirius black

forever and always

"you're singing it together"

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Avalon did some thinking, and she did it quickly because Sirius was a very impatient person. "Fine."

"Fine?" 

"Fine. Okay," she huffed. "Let's just do this before I change my mind." 

Sirius nodded. "Okay then. Why don't we ease into this slowly?" he offered. "I will start here and then I'll make my way to your lips."

He picked up Avalon's right hand and lifted it hesitantly. Sirius looked up at Avalon as he kissed the back of her hand. "Stop, you're making me scared."

"How am I making you scared-"

"I don't know!" she fretted. "It's too much anticipation!"

"I want to make this easy for you and I want to make sure you're comfortable-"

"I was but I'm getting pretty uncomfortable right now-"

"Well, what do you want me to do?!" Sirius shouted, cutting her off.

"JUST KISS ME!" 

Sirius let go of her hand and cupped her face in a split second. He shut his eyes and quickly brought his lips onto Avalon's. 

Avalon was taken aback because part of her didn't think he'd actually do it, but she tried her best to kiss back, or whatever she thought kissing back was. Her palms were sweating and her eyes were forced shut, but Sirius was right. First kisses did feel like nothing. 

Avalon thought it would feel like something at least, since she'd fancied Sirius for a decent amount of time, but it felt like slugs. Not that she ever knew what slugs felt like, but this is what they would feel like. 

And even though she did feel slugs on her lips, she was okay with it because she knew it was Sirius. And she liked Sirius.

Sirius slowly removed himself from her, taking his hands off first, then his lips. Avalon's eyes fluttered open and she smiled a little bit, although she was very embarrassed for some reason.

Sirius smiled back.

"It's you, Av."

"What?" she frowned. 

"The person I fancy is you."

He stared at her hopefully and held his breath, waiting for a response.

Avalon, on the other hand, was not expecting that at all. Her eyes widened significantly and she pursed her lips together tightly. She couldn't form the words to say that she fancied him too and she didn't know what was stopping her, but a part of her wasn't letting her tell him. 

Sirius' smile vanished and fear flashed in front of his grey eyes. "I thought- I thought- I didn't-"

"I'm gonna go," Avalon said, choking on her words. She didn't know what else to say at that moment and her mouth wouldn't let her say anything other than that.

"Wait, Av, I don't- but you- and the other day- I-"

He couldn't seem to form words either but at least he was trying to, while Avalon was too afraid to say anything more. Maybe it was because she was afraid of rejection or maybe she was just scared. Maybe that was why she was a Slytherin. Because she wasn't brave.

"Dinner is in like fifteen minutes," Avalon said quickly. "So goodbye." She grabbed her backpack off the ground and basically ran out of Sirius' dorm, leaving him a stuttering, angry mess.