My Love is a Star (BTS Suga Fanfiction)

92. Fragile and Vulnerable

ROZIE's POV

I leaned against the kitchen counter with my arms across my chest, waiting for the heater to do its job. I still can't believe how the turn of events happened. It quickly transitioned from awkward to heartwarming in just a short span of time.

I can hear him sniffing from where I was at. He had his head rested on the couch, his eyes fixed on the chandelier above him. He hasn't spoken a word since he arrived and damn, it scares and worries me up until now.

Ever since I met the guy, he always had a lot to say. From the moment he caught me hiding behind the fridge at their dorm to day one of being in this house. How many rules did he lay out? I can't even recall. All I know is when he reached Rule #5, my brain just went autopilot.

Tsk. I'm sure he never mentioned anything about a curfew. I swear to God.

I tugged on my sleeve and realized it was still wet from his tears. I felt a pinch in my heart all of a sudden.

He had countless, heavy sobs. It was heartbreaking to even just remember how it was to hear him. I am still clueless about what made him feel that way though. All I could ever do was to assure him that I wasn't going anywhere.

Did it help? I don't know. But it made him break down even more. I'm just not sure if it was for the better or worse.

During that heart-rending moment though, it made me realize that even superstars like them have these moments just like average people do. It's even harder knowing their entire lives are made available through a magnifying glass for the rest of the world to see. They may have their supportive fans cheering them on but they also have detractors waiting for them to mess up and take their fall.

No wonder why they always have to be flawless, like every day should be so damn perfect. When in reality, there is so much more than meets the eye.

They get tired.

They get hurt.

They break down and cry.

Just like everybody else.
____________________________________________________________

I put the wooden tray slowly at the coffee table. That trip from the kitchen to the living room, with a tea set's life dependent on me, was definitely a milestone. I have vowed to myself not to break anything else in this house besides that old, red speaker. I quickly cast the thought away before it even consumes my mind.  Happy thoughts Rozie. Only happy thoughts.

Phew. I didn't spill a drop. Small victories. I smiled giddily but stopped almost instantly when I caught his gaze.

Rozie, try to learn how to display appropriate emotions. It's worth a try.

I sat right next to him and poured him a cup. "I got you some tea. It really helped me calm down the last time." I handed him the teacup politely like how I see on TV. Koreans must be the most courteous people on the planet.

But when he said, "I'm not a tea person..." my heart just sank. Okay. I take back what I just said. He should've said so you know! Could've saved me both effort and time.

"... but thanks." He warmly smiled, taking the cup from me.

Oh-kay. Feeling a little guilty. Maybe I shouldn't make quick judgments.

I took a sip from my cup and so did he. Then everything fell silent again. It was starting to feel awkward too, at least for me. I want him to feel comfortable. I'm not the type who gets into other people's businesses but he sure looks like he needs to unload himself of something.