My Love is a Star (BTS Suga Fanfiction)

95. The Invite

JK's POV

Our conversation got cut short when Sejun Hyung called, telling me he was already at the parking lot waiting. Apparently, my mom got in touch with him and requested him to drive me to the KTX station. I was pretty clear when I said I didn't want to bother him but my mom does things under the table sometimes. And Sejun Hyung is such an angel to refuse so long as it involves my safety. I don't like people waiting for me so I hurriedly got ready and threw a couple of things in my duffel bag.

When I opened the door, she was standing right by it with a snack bag in her hands.

"I made you a sandwich and got your coffee from the fridge. In case you get hungry." She may not be aware that they have food for sale in the station and the train itself. But heck, I'm loving what she's doing. If she does this every day, I'm not sure how much longer I can hold myself back. She's making it all so easy and hard for me at the same time.

"You didn't have to but thanks. I appreciate it."

"You're welcome." She smiled sweetly.

"So I guess I'll see you in a couple of days. While I'm gone..."

"Don't worry I have everything listed." She pulled a piece of paper from her back pocket with her nice handwriting scribbled all over it. The silly rules I laid out to her during her first day here. These rules have lost their validity ever since the incident with the drunken men. A lot of things have changed since then. Things have been better. I've been better.

I just wanted to say, "Take care of yourself." but nevertheless, I smiled at her little effort to keep me at peace. At the back of my mind though, something's telling me this may just be some compensation for whatever's going to happen when I'm not around. I shouldn't have let that idea float in the first place. As a result, now I'm having all these negative thoughts and feelings sprouting from all directions.

"Alright then." I pursed my lips together. When I realized she's going to Daegu until God knows when that made everything worse. The things that may happen flashed before my eyes. He's going to seal it there for sure. She slipped away twice from him and knowing him, he's never gonna let her get away this time around. I gritted my teeth together. 

Fuck. I don't like it. I don't like it at all.

But what can you do anyway? What can you really do about it JK?

Nothing. Nothing.

I felt like a loser.

It's a fight I think I'll never win.

No, I'm sure I'll never win it. They have invested in each other both time and feelings. All I have is the little time we spend in this apartment and these feelings I kept to myself.

There is nothing mutual about us. So don't cross the line JK. Just please don't.

My fingers dug into the strap of my duffel bag, just like how I'm choking all these foolish emotions in my chest. It stops here JK. It stops now.

"I'll go ahead." refusing to meet her eyes. I started walking down the hallway while she followed right behind me. 

You don't need to walk me to the door. I may not be able to say goodbye if you do. But she did anyway and I didn't stop her.

Every step I took towards the door weighed like a ton. I can feel my breathing getting heavier by the second. With my strides, I can reach the main door in a jiffy. But I was purposely slowing my pace. I don't expect her to do anything. I just want to linger in her presence a bit longer.