My Love is a Star (BTS Suga Fanfiction)

100. Life is indeed an irony.

JK's POV

"What the hell just happened?!" She exclaimed, swiftly taking my hands off of her face. Her eyes wearily scan the pitch-black cabin.

Fucking "Tunnel. Just a tunnel." I was about to hold her hand in an attempt to calm her down but she snapped it out of my reach like she'd known what I was going to do.

She clasped her hands together on her lap and peeked through the glass windows. "Why is it taking so long?"

I wanted to laugh at her for being so anxious but I couldn't help but feel bad about how that game-changing moment abruptly ended. Did she really get frightened of the darkness, or was this just the perfect excuse to lose touch and pretend like nothing happened? All because of a freaking tunnel. Damn it.

"It's one of the longest tunnels out here. It'll take around 10 minutes I guess. But there's nothing to worry about. Really." I flashed her a reassuring smile but her eyes were focused on her hands. She just nodded a couple of times but she never really looked in my direction.

I told you so, JK. You should've let her go. But you just badly want to kiss the girl.

It was a good thing the entire cabin was still unilluminated, or else she would've seen the shame painted across my face. Did I just blow things up?

Maybe she was oblivious of what you were trying to do? Impossible. She was like an inch from me before I almost closed my eyes. She knew it. She let me get intimate with her.

Nevertheless, she had her back turned away from me now. Her head rested on her side of the window.

Aish, JK. Look what you've done. I shut my eyes in anguish. Whatever happened to baby steps? You just took a blindsided leap. You were overconfident. You should've slowed down. I continued to scold myself.

A few minutes after, the sunshine from the window greeted us once again. But she stayed in the same position, quiet as a mouse. I feel my heart sinking in my chest. We were this close and now we seemed to be miles apart.

Maybe I should give her her silent time back. It would probably be best to just put things to rest for the time being.

____________________________________________________________

Half an hour has passed and still not saying a word to each other. I can now see her face again but she made sure she sat right next to the window leaving a considerable amount of space between us.

I tried to appear unaffected. I'm not even sure if she intends to make me feel this way. I feel unwanted. My heart was painfully twitching as I said the word in my head.

She was on her phone again, occasionally gasping every time we passed another tunnel. I'd secretly steal glances at her recognizing how her eyes would be wide opened like she'd seen a ghost. Her hands would ball into fists as if preparing to fight an unseeable force.

Her hand would then clutch her chest. Her eyes momentarily close as a sign of relief whenever the sun strikes the window once more. She'd repeat the same little gestures without fail as if experiencing the whole thing like the first time.

So this is how she is when she gets surprised.

"Are you always this jumpy?" I braved to break the silence. At least half an hour to go before we hit Busan and I need to make sure we're alright.

She flinched a bit at the sound of my voice. "Yeah." She nervously smiled. "What years and years of coffee can do to you." She obviously felt awkward. She didn't know where to cast her eyes upon, to me or her phone.