Monsters - Loki x Reader Fanfiction.

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After the revelation of her relationship with Loki,
Y/N felt embarrased. Some of the reactions were worse than she imagined them to be. They were angry. Especially Steve, who currently stood in the en-suite bathroom washing his face, of the bedroom Y/N was resting in. He kept making lots of noise, as if he wanted to start a conversation with her, but didn't know how. As if he was trying to send her a signal which clearly communicated his anger without actually saying it. Y/N wasn't going to indulge in his attempt, if he wanted to speak to her about it, he'd have to bring it up first. Steve had always been very protective of Y/N, she noticed recently, he always made sure she was okay. Y/N was always angry and rude to him, but it never drove him away. He continued to always care for her no matter what. She knew he probably cared for the fact that she felt so guilty, but his anger of her liking a murderous evil god outweighed that care. Y/N could understand the reactions, although she didn't want to see him, Loki had done very bad things, killed Agent Coulson, mind controlled Clint, stabbed her. But so had she, she felt like sometimes the boys forgot that she was a murderer. No, a serial killer. Perhaps a villian like Loki was all she was any good for. Natasha always understood the guilt, they had similar pasts. Although Natasha's killings were part of her job and Y/N did it because she was jealous of how rich they were. Most of them were really bad people anyways, that's what helps the guilt go away most nights. Her thought trail was interrupted by the sound of a loud huff, Steve wiped his face dry with a towel and looked directly at Y/N in the mirror staring at him from the bed.

"So you really liked this Loki guy huh?"

"What's it matter to you?"

"Nothing, I mean, I just think you deserve better than that."

"I thought you knew how hard it was to support someone who had done bad things? Loki, he isn't a bad person."

"He's a murderer. By choice."

"So am I Steve, did you forget that? or did you suppress it so deep into your subconscious so your stupid hero squad would be just the way you like?"

"Y/N, we both know there was a difference in...he killed innocent people. You, not so much."

"Still killed people, stole them away from their families."

"The same way they stole girls from their families and sold them for millions? Stop telling yourself you're a bad person. Stop telling yourself you deserve nothing. Look, Y/N. I know you have a hard time accepting that you are and can be a good person, but you gotta believe it. I believe you are, I know you are. And it's not your fault he's dead, and you deserve better than a villian, you deserve a hero, like yourself."

"Heroes don't let people die."

"You didn't let him die. As far as I'm aware, from what Thor told me. He chose to sacrifice himself. You couldn't have done anything."

"Still..."

"Still nothing. It's not your fault he's dead."

"Well you can say that all you like but it won't get rid of the way I feel or any of the nightmares."

"Nightmares?"

"Yes."

"Well, what if I stay here with you tonight. You'll know, even if you have a nightmare, that I'll be here to support you after one."

"Yeah, that would be nice I guess."

"Still, don't know what you seen in him. With the greasy black hair, and cocky attitude," Y/N looked at him with eyes that told him to choose his next words carefully. "I mean what a catch he was!"

"Why do you even care so much?"

"Huh?"

"About me and Loki, about our ONE kiss. You jealous or something?"