Chosen (Damiano David & Victoria DeAngelis)

Chapter 40

"Fuck I...I don't think I can do this...", once again, she brought Damiano into her arms, trying to calm him down. They only had an hour left till the concert would start and he was breaking down completely. She didn't know why...he probably didn't know either but she guessed that just everything had gotten too much for him to handle. Who could blame him? "Deep breaths, Angel...deep breaths, okay?", she soothed as she rubbed his back in a very comforting way. It was the first time he was crying in front of the others as well. He just hadn't been able to hold it back this time. Ethan watched them, a soft but extremely worried look in his eyes. He didn't say anything...nor did he come close but that was good. Thomas on the other hand wasn't as calm and collected. He seemed to be annoyed...angry, almost. That's what Ethan had meant with he is unpredictable. Thomas could be the sweetest human being on this planet but he wasn't exactly someone who could deal with lots of emotions as he had some sort of anger issues himself. She tried to blend that out, gently brushing through Damiano's hair. She knew he was scared of people finding out and judging him but it seemed like all of his issues just came together, making it extremely difficult for him to think rationally. "I can't go out there, Vic...I just can't.", he whispered desperately, holding onto her tightly. Something needed to happen...fast. "We need to cancel the concert...and the whole tour altogether. I know that's a harsh decision but it can't go on like that. We need to stop.", she said for everyone to hear. She felt how Damiano was shaking his head but she didn't pay too much attention as Ethan stepped a bit closer. "I agree, Vic...I really do. But you know just as well as I do that it's not that easy. We can't cancel a concert an hour before it's supposed to start. That's not gonna do any good to anyone at all." She held Damiano a bit tighter as she stared at their drummer: "It is what's best for Damiano...that's all I care about." Ethan sighed but nodded: "I know...I know and I would be happy to make that possible...but nobody's gonna let us cancel this show. And you know how our manager is. He'll force us to finish the tour...it's only a few more days..." She knew he was right but still, hearing things like that made her extremely angry:" A few more days? Look at him, Ethan. He needs some time to get better. A few days can completely destroy him." She took some deep breaths to calm down a bit: "I'm sorry...I know it's not your fault...and I know you're right. But it's not fair." Now Thomas spoke up: "Can you stop this bullshit? Whatever it is, he needs to get his shit together and stop whining like a fucking baby. Our show is on in 45 minutes." She couldn't believe what she was hearing. She glared at him, feeling the anger bubbling up inside of her: "Do you hear what you're saying, Thomas? Have you looked at him? It can't go on like that." Now, Thomas got up, kinda pulling Damiano out of her arms so he could face Victoria without anyone between them: "No, do YOU hear what YOU'RE saying?! All you care about is him, when he clearly only wants attention because his fucking girlfriend is not around. Are you two having sex? Is that it? Because right now it looks a lot like you don't give a shit about this band." That caught her by surprise but before she could respond to any of that, Damiano spoke up: "Leave her alone, Thomas..." It was very noticeable that some of the things Thomas had said had hurt him but she couldn't deny that her heart skipped a beat when he stood up for her. Thomas looked at him, pure anger in his eyes: "Ok, Damiano why don't you go back to crying like the fucking attention whore you are?" That was enough for her, she pushed him backwards harshly. Carla had probably insulted him more than enough. "You listen real close now, Thomas...", she growled. "You call him that one more time, I'm gonna fucking end you. Don't get me wrong, I like you...but this is where friendship stops. Some boundaries can't be overstepped and you are this fucking close to doing that exact thing. So, if I were you, I would watch my fucking mouth." That left him completely dumbfounded, so she went back to Damiano and grabbed his hand, leading him to another room, so they could have some private time.

She could tell that Thomas' words had gotten to him. He was in a vulnerable place at the moment and literally any words could do harm. He looked even worse than before...pale and anxious. She sat down on the sofa next to him, gently wrapping an arm around him: "Angel...", she whispered and to her surprise he turned to look at her immediately: "What if he's right, Vic..." She immediately shook her head, her hand drawing gentle circles on his back: "No, he's stupid, that's all. You have every right to be anxious and scared, he just doesn't understand that." "But...he...he called me an attention whore...", it was so obvious how much he was fighting against his tears right now, it was heartbreaking. She kept on caressing his back, hoping to make him relax a little: "It's not true, Angel...he had no right to call you that at all." "But maybe it is true...Carla said that as well. I am a man and I am not supposed to cry all the time. You know that, Vic...and I do too." That was enough. It was absolutely unbearable to hear those words coming out of his mouth: "I'm sorry, Damiano but Carla is a bitch. She abused you for God knows how long and nothing she ever said to you was true. And I really need you to get rid of that stupid mindset about masculinity. Of course, some people exaggerate for attention and cry because of things nobody has to cry about. But you don't do that. You're holding it back all the time but sometimes that just doesn't work and that is absolutely okay. You have experienced more pain than most people ever will in their entire lives and still, you are strong enough to hide it from so many people. But believe me...sometimes it's easier to just let go, even if that means being judged or having to deal with people who don't get it. Regardless, you are not weak, you are allowed to cry and most certainly, you are not an attention whore." He looked at her in disbelief, tears now glistening in his big brown eyes: "That's the kindest thing someone has said to me in a while...thank you...", at the end of the sentence, his voice broke which almost made her tear up as well. "Fuck, Damiano...don't make me cry now...", she chuckled a bit to make the tension go away a bit. He chuckled too, though it was a sad chuckle as he erupted in sobs right after. "I's okay, Angel...cry it out.", she whispered, now pulling him into a strong hug again. "But...but the show...", he protested but she just gently wiped his face to get some tears out of the way: "Forget the show. If they care about you, they can wait. You and me...we're taking some time now, alright? No pressure...just let everything out and we'll manage the rest while we're on stage.", her voice was quiet and soothing and it seemed to actually help him as she felt his muscles relax a bit. "They're gonna hate me, Vic...if I keep them waiting they're gonna hate me. Just like Thomas hates me, like Carla hated me...and how you'll eventually end up hating me.", his voice was barely more than a whisper shaken by sobs which made that whole statement even harder to process. "Thomas doesn't hate you...he just doesn't understand. And I would never ever hate you either. Why on earth would I hate you?" The next words he spoke completely shattered her: "Because I am a waste of space. I'm worth nothing, Victoria."

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Hey ;)

I am terribly sorry about the delay but I had some trouble with the internet because - as I said - I am currently on vacation in another country.

Anyway...I hope you like it.

What do you think about Thomas' reaction? Is it understandable or completely unjustified? What could be a reason for his behaviour? And what do you think about Damiano breaking down again? What would be the best solution for everyone? Let me know in the comments :)

Thanks for reading.

- Thalia