Where Ever you Go

..Chapter 12 - The Daft and the Damaged..

The stillness in his office chilled Logan's body to the bone. He was frozen to his chair. Virgil had called him, and it shook something loose in his heart, something he had been burying for years. He had been building an empire, and yet everyone hated what he needed to do to maintain order. Even Virgil, who he had let go, who he had allowed to leave despite the rules, was saying he was in the wrong. Logan was following the rules and orders his parents had raised him in, the things that they had taught him were right. He had only broken the rules for his brothers, and for Virgil. Maybe it was time for him to go back to being the good child he had been before.

The pencil in his fingers bounced in thought. A good boss got rid of those who betrayed him, but took care of those who followed his instructions. Following the rules would mean.... He took in a deep breath, slowing his fidgeting. Following the rules would mean disposing of all three of them. They had questioned his authority, and he was supposed to get rid of them for that, but he couldn't do it. He didn't want to be alone. One failure didn't need to be the reason for their destruction, right? If he could just get them to understand what he was trying to do, what he was trying to protect.

Logan was trying so hard, and it felt like everyone was against him. None of them understood. Was he making it all worse?

He dropped the pencil, grabbing his right hand with his left. Virgil had always been his confidant, he was crafty, and always seemed to look at the worst outcomes in a scenario. It had made preparing for things easier, but he hadn't been built for the stress. Virgil thrived under soft consideration and consistency, that was not the life Logan led.

He ran his fingers over where his engagement ring should have been. Originally, the engagement ring was meant for the left hand, because of an incorrect belief about the veins in the fingers. Logan had wanted to stick with those traditions, no matter how far removed society was. Virgil had called him a dork but smiled and agreed. His fiance had brought out a part of himself that he thought he lost long ago, a love and curiosity for the world. Logan really had thought that they would have each other for forever.

But that was before things went south.

He pinched his finger hard, using the pain to ground himself. Virgil left because he wasn't meant for this life, but Remus left because he believed Logan didn't care. He could fix that, couldn't he?

"Logan?"

His head shot up as he looked at the intruder into his space, quickly picking up his pencil again as a makeshift weapon. It was only Roman. His shoulders relaxed a little as he nodded in acknowledgment. He should have expected that someone would let him out. Logan couldn't even be mad, but he took precautions for Remus. He was the only one with a key.

"Roman." He responded.

"What is your plan now? Keep us locked up like animals?" His voice was strained and although Logan could tell that his brother was doing the best he could to maintain his composure, Roman's forte had never been the control of his emotions. There was a mix of fear and anger, he didn't understand. None of them understood.

The fact that Roman was lashing out was expected. He just wanted to be able to say the right thing to smooth this over, but he was tired. "If that's what it takes, yes."

"Wow, I didn't realize I was related to a monster." That was unnecessary.

"Is that the best insult you can come up with?"

"How about Robot? You are so emotionless you can't even see that you are hurting everyone around you! Either that or you just don't care. God, I don't know why I ever trusted you," he laughed a humorless laugh and Logan felt his grip around the pencil tighten. "Just shows that not all family can be trusted. Is your head so big that it eclipses the consequences of your actions? Everyone hates you."

The pencil snapped, and Logan stood. "Get out! If that's how you feel, get the fuck out of my office! Do you think I want this? That I want to be here? But someone had to uphold mom and dad's legacy, someone had to protect the two of you." Logan was taught that weakness was going to get him killed, but he was beginning to believe that the real problem was that weakness would allow everyone to destroy you from the inside.

There was a flash of something in Roman's eyes, but it was gone in a moment as Roman squared his shoulders. Logan had seen this many times, Roman had decided on a course of action and wouldn't change from it. "We are adults now, we don't need you to protect us, we just need you to leave us alone."

Silence permeated the room for a bit before Logan set down the broken pencil. "Is that really what you want?" He asked softly, voice cold and hard as the dead, no emotion leaking through.

"Yes, isn't that obvious?"

Logan kept his face stolid, hiding the raging storm in his head. "Fine, leave."

"Not without my brother."

He fished the key out of his desk, tossing it to Roman. "Now leave, I have work to do."

"That easy?"

"If everything I have done to keep this family together has failed, then there is no point. Leave."

From the corner of his eye, Logan could see Roman opening and closing his mouth in protest before grabbing the key tightly in his hand and walking out the door.

The irony of Roman's words weren't lost on Logan, 'Not without my brother' but he had meant Remus and only Remus.

He held his face in his hands, looking down at the papers on his desk. Drops of water were now scattered on the sheets; he refused to acknowledge where the moisture came from.

It took him a while to pull himself together, straightening his shoulders and pulling a case out from a secret drawer in his desk, gently running his fingers over the wood, he picked up his phone. He dialed the first of two numbers, waiting for the other person on the phone to pick up.

"I'm going home." He didn't wait for the other person to respond before he hung up and called the other number.

"Sleep, I..." his voice faltered for a moment, "I need you to initiate Fallen Star."

"Anything you want boss, but like, you sure? There's no coming back from that."

"I'm aware, and I've made my decision."

"'Ight, if that's what you want. Just give me an hour, kay?"

"Very well, I'll be in my office waiting."