In the Golden Light - A Justice League AU

Chapter 22 - The Bell That Sank

! Before You Read Act 3 !

 {Act 3 has been branded with a content warning for containing the following topics: depression (moments of emptiness and hopelessness), alcohol abuse, verbal abuse, physical abuse, manipulation, gore, death and trauma. Please protect yourself first if these topics will upset you/cause a trigger.}
{This particular chapter deals with: depression, slight suicidal thoughts alcohol abuse}

In the quiet ocean, her heart echoed in her ears, so loud as though every sea creature could hear it. Soft but hard thumps against her ribcage. 

Lazuli curled up tighter in the underwater cave where she first hid Goldwath when they first met, shivering. Her body had been in pain ever since her argument with her Father over the incident. She had ran away from Atlantis, furious over her Father's proposal for her to be under 24/7 supervision and to never see Goldwath again. 

How more ridiculous could he get!? she thought angrily, tearing the rock with her claws. Why didn't Mother interfere?? Or Starshern or Heelburn? UGH! WHY DON'T THEY ALL LISTEN TO ME!?!?

Another surge of pain seized her, her muscles tightening uncomfortably. 

Clams and pearls, what is this sudden pain that has seized me? she groaned to herself. I've only felt this slightly when...I was with Goldwath...but since returning, it's starting to get worse. ... She flicked her ears. ...Don't let it be what I think it might be--

Lazuli lifted up her head once the pain ceased and poked it outside to scan. Once it was clear, she headed out once more, going at a slow pace to not wear herself out.

Aquaman, help me.

✰✰✰

"Oh, my poor son."

"It's...It sounds stupid, I know. But... I really love her, Mother Merli. I thought I loved Hawkgirl, but...Lazuli is different."

In the bustling bar, Goldwath sat in a more private room as the other alien looking wolf, Mother Merli, tended to his wounds as she listened to the recounts he was telling her, her paws gentle against his fur. Braaqi had been with the two of them for a while before he had to continue his job. Though nodding and agreeing, this time she grabbed his cheek and gave it a gentle tug, shaking it. The fin like flap on her head twitched. 

"No, son, it is not stupid," she said in her raspy yet motherly voice. "Don't call yourself or your actions stupid. You were hurt, angry, betrayed, heartbroken. Pretty sure everyone has their regrets when acting on those emotions blindly. Though, you should have been more in control of your anger than having someone to remind you. You have to do that yourself."

"Tell me, son, what troubles you?"

The Thanagarian raised an eyebrow at the alien. "Son?" he said bitterly. "Who do you think you are-- Don't touch me!"

"Trust me." The alien approached closer to him, a paw extended. "I'm called Mother Merli for a reason."

She then pressed her paw to his forehead, and a rush of calm overtook him.

Goldwath sighed, shaking the memory, and placed his head in his paw, tuning out the music that blared outside and the excited shouts of the bar's customers. He felt so alone in a crowd. The sadness from losing Lazuli and regret from attacking the very person who gave him a second chance of life by joining the League consumed his soul, tearing him apart. He jerked his head back, scratching his claws at his mask, right where his temple was. He couldn't handle this much heavy weight in his heart. Too much, he muttered in his head, too much, it's all too much. I can't take it anymore.