It's Only The Beginning {1}

† Thirty Seven †

I groan as my eyes open due to the sunlight shining through.

I spin to face Lexas back and I trail my fingers up and down her arm gently.

"We have to talk about Ice Nati-" she cuts me off mid sentence.

"Shhhh" she whispers to me and I smile at her child like behavior.

I fingers trace the tattoo on her back and I watch as goosebumps slowly lay across her skin at my touch.

"I got it on my ascension day" she tells me gently, still facing away from me.

"A circle for everyone that died" she continues and I could hear the regret in her voice.

It was life or death.

She did what she had to do.

"The commander chose you" I state and watch as she nods.

"Seven circles....I thought you said there were nine officiates in your conclave" I question, my eyes trained on the tattoo.

"There were" she confirms.

"What happened to number eight?"

I hear her release a sigh before slowly turning over to face me.

"Can we talk about something else" she asks me, avoiding my eyes and I nod.

"Of course, you don't have to tell me anything you don't want to.....we have all the time in the world....right?" I grin at her but she can see it wasn't completely real.

"What wrong" her right arm props her head up to look at me while her left is draped over my waist.

I watch as her eyes flicker with worry and concern.

"I won't be able to live without you if you die, Lex" I whisper and she shakes her head.

"Don't even think about that. Neither of us are dying anytime soon" she immediately gets angry but I could tell it was a wall to block her emotions.

"Lexa..." I trail off and she sighs.

"I wouldn't be able to live without you either. You can't die on me, okay? You're the only person I've loved since Costia. I just- I can't lose you, okay?! So don't even think about it" she rants and I lift my hand up to caress her cheek.

My life would be so different without her.

I probably wouldn't be alive right now if it weren't for her.

She made me happy.....no...she makes me happy.

She saved me.

I don't think I could do anything to repay her for that.

"We have to get going" I break the comfortable silence and she groans.

Her eyes close as she lays limp beside me.

"C'mon, you have your Commander duties and I have to make things right with O, Kota and Clarke" I explain.

I sit up in the bed before climbing to my feet.

Feeling the movement, she opens one eye and smirks as she looks my nude body up and down.

"Are you sure we have to go" she winks and I laugh, grabbing a pillow and throwing it at her face.

She sits up, her arms holding the pillow on her lap.

She smiles, laughing slightly.

"I'm the Commander, I could get you in trouble for doing that" she teases and I smile, tugging on my pants, having already put on my undergarments.

"Get up, come on" I pull her out of the bed and watch as she gets ready.

"Where'd my shirt and jacket go" I ask, looking around the room.

"Over here, babe. Heads up" I heard her call and I spin to face her right as she throws it.

The clothes smack me in the face and she breaks out laughing at my flustered state.

They fall in a pile at my feet as I try to recover from the hit.

She spins around in circles before she starts talking to me.

"Have you seen my coat" she scans the room once again only to sigh in defeat.

"Watch it" I call as I throw the brunette her coat.

It hits her in the back of the head and with the weight of it and with how hard I threw it, it took her down.

I start dying laughing as her body hit the floor.

I hear a groan in response and laugh even harder.

"I'll get you for that, Mara" she warns as she stands up, putting her jacket on when she's on two feet.

She stalks towards me and when she's close enough, her fingers prod and poke at my sides as she starts a tickle war.

And no.

I don't mean a fight or little cutsie game.

I mean war.

I wrap my arms around her and pick her up, body slamming her down on the bed.

We both giggle playfully as I hold myself up as I hover above her.

"I love you" I tell her, a grin on my face.

She kisses me gently before smiling.

"I love you too"