Hell is Living Without You ~ Loki

Chapter Three

"We should never have let him go." Volstagg stated. We were all sat in the Common Room, dealing with what had just happened. "There was no stopping him." Sif said. "Well, at least he's only banished, not dead. Which is what we'd all be if that guard hadn't told Odin where we'd gone." Fandral explained.
After a moments silence Volstagg spoke up. "How did the guard even know?" He asked. Loki looked up and took a breath. "I told him." He confessed. "What?" Fandral muttered. "I told him to go to Odin after we'd left. He should be flogged for taking so long. We should never have reached Jotunheim." Loki informed. "You told the guard?" Volstagg yelled. "I saved our lives. And Thor's. I had no idea Father would banish him for what he did." Sif stood up hurriedly. "Loki. You must go to the Allfather and convince him to change his mind." She pleaded. "And if I do, then what? I love Thor more dearly than any of you, but you know what he is. He's arrogant. He's reckless. He's dangerous. You saw how he was today. Is that what Asgard needs from its king?" Loki questioned, walking out.

I'll be in the weapons vault, meet me there and I'll show you.

"He may speak of the good of Asgard, but he's always been jealous of Thor." Sif spat. "You should be grateful to him, he saved our lives." I defended. "Laufey said there were traitors in the House of Odin. A master of magic could bring three Jotuns into Asgard." Hogun commented. I turned to him in horror and disbelief. "Do you seriously think that little of him? Loki's always been one for mischief, but you're talking about something else entirely." I scolded, turning to leave.

I entered the vault and saw Loki standing before the Casket. "Loki, what is it you want to show me?" I asked, approaching him. "You're my closest and only friend Freyja. You know that don't you?" He asked, hesitantly. "Of course I know that. That's why we gotta stick together." I smiled softly. "Are you sure though? What if one of us changed? Was different? A monster perhaps?" He asked. I furrowed my brows in confusion. "Loki, where is this coming from?" I questioned. He moved and picked up the Casket and I saw his hands turning blue. "Stop!" Odin yelled. "Am I cursed?" Loki asked. "No." Odin said. "What am I?" He asked, turning to face Odin and me. His whole body was blue and his eyes mirrored that of a Jotun. "Your my son." The Allfather said almost regretfully. "What more than that? The Casket wasn't the only thing you took from Jotunheim that day, was it?" Loki said, advancing toward him. "No...In the aftermath of the battle, I went into the temple and I found a baby. Small for a giants offspring. Abandoned, Suffering, Left to die...Laufey's son." Odin explained. "Laufey's son?" Loki repeated. "Yes." Odin stated simply. "Why? You were knee deep in Jotun blood, why would you take me?" Loki asked, almost crying. "You were an innocent child." Odin answered. "No. you took me for a purpose. What was it?" He pressed. Odin looked down in shame. "Tell me!" Loki cried, desperately. Tears welled in my eyes at the sight of my friend so broken. "I thought we could unite our kingdoms one day. Bring about an alliance, bring about permanant peace. Through you." Odin explained. "What?" He breathed, and I began walking closer to them. "But those plans no longer matter." I rolled my eyes. Of course Odin would make it about him. "So I am no more than another stolen relic, locked up in here until you might have use for me?" Loki scoffed. "Why do you twist my words?" Odin sighed. "You could have told him what he was from the beginning. Why didn't you?" I asked. "Loki is my son, I only wanted to protect him from the truth." Odin replied. "Because I'm the monster parents tell their children about at night!?" Loki asked in defeat. "You know it all makes sense now! Why you favoured Thor all these years! Because no matter how much you claim to love me, you could never have a Frost Giant on the throne of Asgard!" Loki spat. Odin fell to the floor suddenly. I looked at Loki in confusion, we slowly apporoache him and i checked his breathing - which had slowed dramatically. Loki, realising this, called for the guards and they came rushing.

*****

It had been days since the confrontation in the weapons vault and Odin was still laid up in bed. Whilst he rested, Loki took his place and let's just say he made sure people were aware of it. Since becoming King, Loki had become distant and rarely spoke to me, so now I was stuck in the Common Room once again with Sif, Volstagg, Fandral and Hogun. I rested my head on my fist, and used the arm of the chair for elbow support.
"Our dearest friend banished, Loki on the throne, Asgard on the brink of war, yet you've managed to consume four wild boar, six pheasant, a side of beef and two casts of ale. Shame on you. Don't you care?!" Fandral scolded Volstagg. "Do not mistake my appetite for apathy!" Volstagg roared. "Stop it both of you! Stop!" Sif cried, standing between the pair. "We all know what we have to do. We must go, we must find Thor." She explained. "It's treason." Fandral stated. "To hell with treason, it's suicide." Volstagg said. "Thor would do the same for us." Sif commented and they agreed. Volstagg turned to face me. "You seem awfully quiet Freyja. Usually you would have stuck up for Loki, or made a comment to advise us not to go by now." He quipped. I stood, and for a second he looked scared. I strode forward and joined their group. "That's because I want in. Loki has changed, he would never usually act this way. He needs to be stopped before he does something worse." I confessed. "Now shush, Heimdall might be watching." I said. Seconds later, as if on cue, a guard marched in. "Heimdall demands your presence." He told us. "We're doomed." Volstagg mumbled under his breath.

"You would defy the commands of Loki, our king, break every oath you have taken as warriors, and commit treason to bring Thor back?" Heimdall asked once we got there. "Yes." Fandral said for us. Heimdall moved away from the key and walked forward. "Good." He said simply. "So you'll help us?" I asked as he walked away. "I am bound by honour to our king. I cannot open the bridge to you." He finished, just leaving us there. "Complicated fellow isn't he? Now what do we do?" Volstagg asked, just as the Bifrost opened and we were transported to where Thor was.

*****

We walked through a desert town and noticed a familiar face through a window. "Found you!" Volstagg yelled, alerting The God of Thunder. "My friends!" He boomed happily. "I don't believe it." One of the mortals breathed. "Ah apologies. Freyja Sigurddottir and Lady Sif with the Warriors Three." I introduced, before being picked up in a bear hug by Thor. "My friends, I've never been happier to see anyone. But you should not have come." Thor said with concern. "We're here to take you home." Sif said. "You know I can't go home. My father is dead because of me. And I must remain in exile." Thor told us, earning a frown from us. "Thor, Odin still lives." I informed him.

We were interuppted by the sound of panicked civilians. When we stepped outside, we saw a huge portal from a distance. "Was somebody else coming?" A female mortal asked. "Loki, what are you doing?" I asked myself under my breath. "Jane, you needd to leave." Thor instructed to one of the mortals. "What are you going to do? I'm staying here!" She exclaimed. "Thor's going to fight with us!" Volstagg announced proudly. Thor looked solemn for a second, but then held his head up. "My friends, I'm just a man. I'll only be in the way, or worse, get one of you killed. But I can help these people to safety." He explained apologeically. "Well, if you're staying so am I!" Jane shouted stubbornly. "We'll need some time." I told Thor as the Destroyer approached us. "You'll have it." He smiled, running to save the mortals.

Sif and I looked at each other and nodded our heads. I ran behind the metal man and climbed up a wooden pole. Volstagg got thrown back and I gave Sif the signal. We both jumped on top of the threat, Sif aimed for the jugular, whilst I aimed for the head. We striked it together, bringing it down victoriously. Sif and I grinned at each other, but it fell when the Destroyer began moving to face us. "Jump!" I cried, and we leapt off it onto the hard ground. Thor ran up to Sif, and kneeled beside her. "Sif, you've done all you can." Thor told her. "No. I will die a warriors death. Stories will be told of this day." She muttered. "Live, and tell those stories yourself. Now Go!" He instructed, before running to Fandrall, Hogun, Volstagg and I. "You must return to Asgard. You have to stop Loki." He said. "What about you?" Fandrall asked. "Do not worry my friends. I have a plan." Thor stated. I went up to the mortals and helped Sif guide them away. "Wait." Jane said, stopping us all to watch Thor. He must have said something, because seconds later, he was flung backwards - resulting in severe injuries.
I ran forward, as did Jane. But I headed for The Destroyer. "Loki!" I yelled, gaining it's attention. It turned to me and waited. "Please, stop this. It isn't you. The Loki I knew, would never harm anyone this badly. End this now and come back to us. To me." I shouted. The Destroyer just stood there for a second before it picked me up and threw me onto the roof of a building, resulting in me falling through to the ground floor.

Freyja, Freyja, Freyja. Never would I have thought you'd pick Thor over me.
The Loki you knew is gone and I can't help that. The past few days have uncovered things I never would have expected to happen. Nevertheless, I cannot return to who I once was as I now see the world in a new light.
Forgive me, dear friend.

My vision was blurry with tears from both the rejection and the hit. Voices could be heard but I ignored them, succumbing to the pain and blacking out.

*****

I awoke in my bed in Asgard. My eyes adjusted to the light, and I was met with a regretful looking Frigga and Sif. "What are you guys doing here? Did we do it? What of Loki? Is he okay?" I asked groggily, but I noticed Frigga's head bow and the mention of Loki. I realsied this and raised question. "What happened? Where is he?" I pressed. "Freyja, he and Thor fought on the bridge. He fell, but Odin and Thor caught him. But he let himself go." Sif told me. My face fell and tears pricked in my eyes again. "What?" I breathed in disbelief. "Before he fell, he spoke to me in my mind. He told me to tell you that it wasn't your fault and that he is sorry for all the bad things he ever did to you." Frigga said. My whole body went numb. A whole started to form in the middle of my chest and I wanted to cry. "It's alright child. Grieve." Frigga comforted me, as I let the endless tears fall.